cleaning
My mom is in Idaho now helping her cousin with her new baby. So my big sister and I are cleaning up the house preparing for when my cousin and his wife come over in about a week. My mom's kind of a hoarder so it's a big job. It's not her fault. It's easy to see how it developed. She lived in Israel for a long time, where you have to save things. Here, everything is disposable (not necessarily good). There are plenty of other habits she learned from Israel, like never eating out. I never helped out much around the house, and neither did the rest of my family- that only made things worse. The other thing that really led to it was my sister's health care. There were so many supplies that were impossible to get on our own (like they can only be sold to medical companies) that they limited. There was a type of feeding bag (similar to an IV bag, but it went to a tube in her stomach). They were not supposed to be used for more than one day (24 hours at most). She only used them at night, for eight hours, so one for every three days would have been okay (though they were really not supposed to be used like that). Well, they only let us have the equivalent of one every ten days. They got clogged and sprung leaks, sometimes (often due to overuse), so we had to have extras. For the first few years, we could only use one for every two weeks to have sufficient backups. That's either 3/14 enough or 1/14 enough of that supply that we should have had. Multiply those odds (probably worse, actually) times syringes, formula, a wheelchair, and about two dozen (literally) other vital pieces of equipment or supplies that we didn't get or didn't get enough of.
My mom had to hoard, or my sister might end up getting really sick, suffering, in the hospital and/or dying. I'm not exaggerating. Unfortunately, it bled over to other things. Anything that might have a use in the future stayed. Food that was too old, stale, and even buggy. Clothes that my big sister and I grew out of, because my little sister might grow into them. Of course that would be many years later because she was small, and had growth delays, so it would be out of fashion. Boxes, packaging materials, educational books. Luckily, it's not all that terrible. My house is about a 2.5 on this scale: clutter scale (pages 3-6). I read about a man whose mother had 78 cats at last count. At least my mother saved things she perceived as useful, not just anything. Many hoarders hoard just things. Also, my mom has always recognized it as a problem. She does throw out trash. Unfortunately, it's a million times harder for her now that my little sister is gone. Everything reminds her of her deceased daughter. She just cries so much. The trouble is now we need to clean the house. People are coming over.
I have to give her a lot of credit. She's been trying very hard. And she's let go of a lot of stuff. That being said, my sister and I are doing so much better without her watching over our shoulders. It's mostly my sister's doing. She motivates me, and is organized, and focused. If it was just me, I would get nothing done but a lot of crying.
I'm so tired right now after days of cleaning. Time for bed.
My mom had to hoard, or my sister might end up getting really sick, suffering, in the hospital and/or dying. I'm not exaggerating. Unfortunately, it bled over to other things. Anything that might have a use in the future stayed. Food that was too old, stale, and even buggy. Clothes that my big sister and I grew out of, because my little sister might grow into them. Of course that would be many years later because she was small, and had growth delays, so it would be out of fashion. Boxes, packaging materials, educational books. Luckily, it's not all that terrible. My house is about a 2.5 on this scale: clutter scale (pages 3-6). I read about a man whose mother had 78 cats at last count. At least my mother saved things she perceived as useful, not just anything. Many hoarders hoard just things. Also, my mom has always recognized it as a problem. She does throw out trash. Unfortunately, it's a million times harder for her now that my little sister is gone. Everything reminds her of her deceased daughter. She just cries so much. The trouble is now we need to clean the house. People are coming over.
I have to give her a lot of credit. She's been trying very hard. And she's let go of a lot of stuff. That being said, my sister and I are doing so much better without her watching over our shoulders. It's mostly my sister's doing. She motivates me, and is organized, and focused. If it was just me, I would get nothing done but a lot of crying.
I'm so tired right now after days of cleaning. Time for bed.