Sunday morning crack!fic: God of Doors and Gateways (Stargate Atlantis/Xena crossover)
Welcome to Cracksville, population Mhalachai. As per the poll, here is a crazy crossover for you.
God of Doors and Gateways
A Stargate Atlantis/Xena, Warrior Princess crossover fanfic
Summary: Xena and Gabrielle meet a mysterious man in the forest, one who brings warnings of evil beings called 'Wraiths'.
Rating: PG
Characters: Xena and Gabrielle and a mysterious SGA character
Disclaimer: Sony and MGM own all things Stargate Atlantis. MCA Television and Renaissance Pictures own all things Xena. I'm only borrowing and will return them at the end of the fix.
Setting: Well, it contains spoilers for Season one's Before I Sleep in SGA.
Word count:: ~850 words; complete.
Note: Assuming all the Ancients who went to Earth 10,000 years ago Ascended... well. Take that leap of faith with me. Also, I'm fudging with the dates of the Goa'uld rebellion on Earth, but that's okay, because this is crack!fic.
Another Note: Remember that for a DHD to dial another galaxy, a specific crystal is needed (as McKay is fond of pointing out).
~*~
Xena froze, the forest silent around her. Never had she heard such stillness when surrounded by living things.
She couldn't risk calling for Gabrielle, who should really have known better than to wander away from the campfire at night. The very dark was listening.
Waiting.
The air changed, and Xena was drawing her sword before she even knew in which direction to look for danger.
"Good evening."
The man, wrapped in a light traveling cloak, sat on a rock ten paces away, bathed in moonlight. Xena blinked. He had appeared out of nowhere, without the flashy lights of the Gods.
"Who are you?" Xena demanded.
"And what have I done with little Gabrielle, I suppose is the next question?" the man asked, and smiled. "Now now, Xena, is that any way to treat a friend?"
"I don't make friends with people who threaten me." Xena looked around, trying to figure out what this man had done to Gabrielle. If he had hurt her, then his blood would wash the forest floor.
On the rock, the man chuckled. "Oh, I never said I was your friend." He stood up. "I seek a small object, and my... family, has barred me from it. However, human hands such as yours can retrieve it easily." He glanced at Xena, and sighed. "I suppose you want your friend back." He waved his hand, and Gabrielle appeared at Xena's side.
The blonde woman started back. "Xena, where did you go? You--"
Xena held up her hand. "Why would I do anything for you?" she demanded of the man.
The man smiled. "Because that is your self-appointed mission of atonement, is it not? To aid humanity in penance for your sins?"
"And how will helping you do that?" Xena asked. Her grip tightened on her sword. The air around this man felt charged, as it did whenever Ares was around, but he did not feel like one of the Gods.
"Because it's not helping me, it's helping your people, preventing this world from coming to the attention of..." His voice trailed off. "An enemy far greater than any this world or its Gods have seen." He reached into his cloak and pulled out a small scroll. "Here are the directions to the location you must go, deep in Egypt, at Giza. There, you will find a device. Inside are several crystals. I have made notes on which of the crystals to remove."
"And I suppose this crystal holds great power, and you want it," Gabrielle said, the cynical sarcasm of years in her voice.
"Oh no," the man said. "Destroy the crystal as best you can, then get out of Egypt before the Goa'uld know what you have done." He threw the scroll over to Gabrielle.
"What does this crystal do?" Xena asked. "Why can't you get it yourself?"
"Only human hands may touch it," the man said. He held up his own hands. "These… I am no longer allowed to interfere."
"He didn't answer your question about what the crystal does," Gabrielle said quietly.
"I know that," Xena hissed.
The man chuckled again. "It is in a device that is attached to a gateway to... to a land similar to Hades. Right now, several... worshippers of the Egyptian gods are attempting to open the gateway. They are perhaps a year away from succeeding. If this crystal is destroyed, the gateway cannot reach the land on other side, and the Wraith will never learn of this world's existence."
Xena raised her eyebrows. "A gateway to a land full of... Wraiths." She tried to keep her voice light, but a chill burrowed its way into her spine. She didn't know what these Wraiths were, or what they might do, but the words of this strange man filled her with dread.
The man shrugged and got up off his rock. "The Wraith are creatures bent upon the destruction of all we have built. Believe me if you will. I have already done more than I am permitted."
"Why can't you go stop these guys?" Gabrielle demanded.
"I cannot interfere," the man repeated.
"But you're doing that right now," Gabrielle pointed out.
The man stared at Gabrielle, so intently that Xena had to stop herself from stepping between them. "I am only doing what must be done," he said. "The Wraith must not reach Earth, and things must progress until Elizabeth..." He smiled sadly. "Until it is once again time for man to return to Atlantis. It has happened before, and must again."
He vanished.
Gabrielle let out a startled meep. "What was that?" she asked.
"I don't know," Xena said, already moving. "Come on, we're breaking camp."
"But who was that?" Gabrielle hurried behind Xena, almost as silent on the leaves as her companion. "Was it one of the Gods?"
Wind swept through the trees, rattling the branches far overhead. The air whispered "Janus," over and over, until Xena's head rattled.
"Wait, Janus?" Gabrielle whispered. "God of gates and doorways? That Janus?"
"I'm not waiting around to find out," Xena said grimly. "Hurry. We're setting out for Egypt. Now."
the end
Yet Another Note: Janus was the Roman god of gates, doors, doorways, beginnings, and endings.
God of Doors and Gateways
A Stargate Atlantis/Xena, Warrior Princess crossover fanfic
Summary: Xena and Gabrielle meet a mysterious man in the forest, one who brings warnings of evil beings called 'Wraiths'.
Rating: PG
Characters: Xena and Gabrielle and a mysterious SGA character
Disclaimer: Sony and MGM own all things Stargate Atlantis. MCA Television and Renaissance Pictures own all things Xena. I'm only borrowing and will return them at the end of the fix.
Setting: Well, it contains spoilers for Season one's Before I Sleep in SGA.
Word count:: ~850 words; complete.
Note: Assuming all the Ancients who went to Earth 10,000 years ago Ascended... well. Take that leap of faith with me. Also, I'm fudging with the dates of the Goa'uld rebellion on Earth, but that's okay, because this is crack!fic.
Another Note: Remember that for a DHD to dial another galaxy, a specific crystal is needed (as McKay is fond of pointing out).
~*~
Xena froze, the forest silent around her. Never had she heard such stillness when surrounded by living things.
She couldn't risk calling for Gabrielle, who should really have known better than to wander away from the campfire at night. The very dark was listening.
Waiting.
The air changed, and Xena was drawing her sword before she even knew in which direction to look for danger.
"Good evening."
The man, wrapped in a light traveling cloak, sat on a rock ten paces away, bathed in moonlight. Xena blinked. He had appeared out of nowhere, without the flashy lights of the Gods.
"Who are you?" Xena demanded.
"And what have I done with little Gabrielle, I suppose is the next question?" the man asked, and smiled. "Now now, Xena, is that any way to treat a friend?"
"I don't make friends with people who threaten me." Xena looked around, trying to figure out what this man had done to Gabrielle. If he had hurt her, then his blood would wash the forest floor.
On the rock, the man chuckled. "Oh, I never said I was your friend." He stood up. "I seek a small object, and my... family, has barred me from it. However, human hands such as yours can retrieve it easily." He glanced at Xena, and sighed. "I suppose you want your friend back." He waved his hand, and Gabrielle appeared at Xena's side.
The blonde woman started back. "Xena, where did you go? You--"
Xena held up her hand. "Why would I do anything for you?" she demanded of the man.
The man smiled. "Because that is your self-appointed mission of atonement, is it not? To aid humanity in penance for your sins?"
"And how will helping you do that?" Xena asked. Her grip tightened on her sword. The air around this man felt charged, as it did whenever Ares was around, but he did not feel like one of the Gods.
"Because it's not helping me, it's helping your people, preventing this world from coming to the attention of..." His voice trailed off. "An enemy far greater than any this world or its Gods have seen." He reached into his cloak and pulled out a small scroll. "Here are the directions to the location you must go, deep in Egypt, at Giza. There, you will find a device. Inside are several crystals. I have made notes on which of the crystals to remove."
"And I suppose this crystal holds great power, and you want it," Gabrielle said, the cynical sarcasm of years in her voice.
"Oh no," the man said. "Destroy the crystal as best you can, then get out of Egypt before the Goa'uld know what you have done." He threw the scroll over to Gabrielle.
"What does this crystal do?" Xena asked. "Why can't you get it yourself?"
"Only human hands may touch it," the man said. He held up his own hands. "These… I am no longer allowed to interfere."
"He didn't answer your question about what the crystal does," Gabrielle said quietly.
"I know that," Xena hissed.
The man chuckled again. "It is in a device that is attached to a gateway to... to a land similar to Hades. Right now, several... worshippers of the Egyptian gods are attempting to open the gateway. They are perhaps a year away from succeeding. If this crystal is destroyed, the gateway cannot reach the land on other side, and the Wraith will never learn of this world's existence."
Xena raised her eyebrows. "A gateway to a land full of... Wraiths." She tried to keep her voice light, but a chill burrowed its way into her spine. She didn't know what these Wraiths were, or what they might do, but the words of this strange man filled her with dread.
The man shrugged and got up off his rock. "The Wraith are creatures bent upon the destruction of all we have built. Believe me if you will. I have already done more than I am permitted."
"Why can't you go stop these guys?" Gabrielle demanded.
"I cannot interfere," the man repeated.
"But you're doing that right now," Gabrielle pointed out.
The man stared at Gabrielle, so intently that Xena had to stop herself from stepping between them. "I am only doing what must be done," he said. "The Wraith must not reach Earth, and things must progress until Elizabeth..." He smiled sadly. "Until it is once again time for man to return to Atlantis. It has happened before, and must again."
He vanished.
Gabrielle let out a startled meep. "What was that?" she asked.
"I don't know," Xena said, already moving. "Come on, we're breaking camp."
"But who was that?" Gabrielle hurried behind Xena, almost as silent on the leaves as her companion. "Was it one of the Gods?"
Wind swept through the trees, rattling the branches far overhead. The air whispered "Janus," over and over, until Xena's head rattled.
"Wait, Janus?" Gabrielle whispered. "God of gates and doorways? That Janus?"
"I'm not waiting around to find out," Xena said grimly. "Hurry. We're setting out for Egypt. Now."
the end
Yet Another Note: Janus was the Roman god of gates, doors, doorways, beginnings, and endings.