Sep 08, 2008 11:01
Greetings.
Earlier, through the moderator, I contributed a story of mine which, although I will defend the abstract content of it (i.e. the message), was not exactly written in a literary style. Indeed, I believe it came across as "Pornography by Spinoza." Stylistically, it was closer to a PhD dissertation than a warm and fuzzy fic, and as such some members of the comm decided to give me some advice as to how to avoid sounding overly academic (and thankfully, most of them were helpful and polite and refrained from bashing a first-time fic writer).
Now, I have been working on a second attempt. I have been especially mindful of 1) "showing, not telling" (i.e. describing things is concrete rather than abstract terms and describing things where possible through the POV's of characters, rather than simply making a flat abstract declaration and asking the reader to fill in the small details), 2) Trying to make the dialogue sound more like the characters speech and less like their internal monologues translated by a philosopher and 3) Overall dropping the academic style.
And I am looking for someone to beta it.
I should state, for the record, it is somewhat explicit (i.e. there is a screen-meltingly explicit sex scene).
Now, I will be honest, for a beta-buddy my preferences are for either Khronos_Keeper, Amethyst_Wolf or Imre_Nico, since they left the most helpful-yet-polite concrit. So if any of those three want to beta me, I'd be extra happy.
So, any takers?
Additionally, I also have a shortfic entry for the "External Gazer" challenge. May I ask how I submit it?
Sincere thanks,
OutOfMySystem87