update!
so for the past few months i've been vacillating between surrendering myself to yuppiehood FOREVER to relaxing and living up the 20s freeloading nyc, waitressing and sharing an apartment with financially challenged but big hearted loveable ppl = a lot of frustration, crying and laughing over the phone with margo posing the question: yuppiehood vs comfort? it's the american dream isn't it, working hard, working away your life so you can achieve success wrapped in a white designer sweater at some country club playing tennis/golf. . and yet i know i want the city, have wanted it for all these years, everytime i hear those dumb (damn?) urbanites exclaim "it's the greatest city in the world!" i can't imagine waiting 6 more years to come back to it, maybe even more. i miss its jazz, i miss broadway, times square, the chili+coffee shop in the corner of our apartment. all these possibilities making me drunk, all these little deaths inside of me. i want it all, yes, i want it all, happiness and comfort forever and that doesn't come without a sacrifice.