16
There is a beautiful princess trapped in a castle
guarded by a dragon. Here is the end of the story
with different kind of metalheads as knights.
POWER METAL
The protagonist arrives riding a white unicorn,
escapes from the dragon, saves the princess and
makes love to her in an enchanted forest.
THRASH METAL
The protagonist arrives, fights the dragon, saves
the princess and fucks her.
HEAVY METAL
The protagonist arrives on a Harley, kills the
dragon, drinks a few beers and fucks the princess.
FOLK METAL
The protagonist arrives with some friends playing
accordions, violins, flutes and many more weird
instruments, the dragon falls asleep (because of all
the dancing). Then all leave... without the princess.
VIKING METAL
The protagonist arrives in a ship, kills the dragon
with his mighty axe, skins the dragon and eats it,
rapes the princess to death, steals her belongings
and burns the castle before leaving.
DEATH METAL
The protagonist arrives, kills the dragon, fucks the
princess and kills her, then leaves.
BLACK METAL
The protagonist arrives at midnight, kills the dragon
and impales it in front of the castle. Then he
sodomizes the princess, drinks her blood in a ritual
before killing her. Then he impales the princess
next to the dragon.
GORE METAL
The protagonist arrives, kills the dragon and
spreads his guts in front of the castle, fucks the
princess and kills her.Then he fucks the dead body
again, slashes her belly and eats her guts. Then he
fucks the carcass for the third time, burns the
corpse and fucks it for the last time.
GRIND METAL
The protagonist arrives, screams something
completely undecipherable for about 2 minutes and
then leaves...
DOOM METAL
The protagonist arrives, sees the size of the dragon
and thinks he could never beat him, then he gets
depressed and commits suicide. The dragon eats
his body and the princess as dessert. That's the
end of the sad story.
GOTHIC METAL
The princess in a velvet costume starts singing
soprano. The protagonist completes the duet by
adding the beast part, while the dragon plays the
flute. Suddenly he swallows up the pipe and
accidentally scorches the beauty and the beast
and suffocates to death. All their souls are damned
in hell's eternity.
PROGRESSIVE METAL
The protagonist arrives with a guitar and plays a
solo of 26 minutes. The dragon kills himself out of
boredom. The protagonist arrives to the princess'
bedroom, plays another solo with all the
techniques and tunes he learned in the last year of
the conservatory. The princess escapes looking for
the 'HEAVY METAL' protagonist.
INDUSTRIAL METAL
The protagonist arrives wearing greasy overcoat,
makes obscene gestures towards dragon, and gets
escorted out of fairy tale land by security guards.
SPEED METAL
Suddenly there, short solo, dragon is confused,
someones screaming weird stuff, princess realizes
she's been deflowered, dragon and princess are
still looking for the one who did this.
CHRISTIAN METAL
The protagonist rides in on his way home from
church and sings a mushy power ballad to the
dragon about how much Jesus loves him and that
the dragon should turn to Him. The Dragon is
immediately converted, and when the princess
wants to "thank" the protagonist he replies, "sorry,
but I don't believe in having sex before marriage."
GLAM METAL
The protagonist arrives, the dragon laughs at the
guy's appearance and lets him enter. He steals the
princess' make up and tries to paint the castle in a
beautiful pink colour.
BATTLE METAL
The protagonist arrives with a legion of a hundred
brave footman, war chariots and a dozen elite
warriors and, as a master tactician, flanks the
dragon in a bloody siege that lasts six hours. The
princess gets bored.
NU METAL
The pussy arrives in a skateboard with baggy pants
and calls the dragon names, then he tries to run
away but burns to death when his moronic baggy
clothes catch fire, the princess then laughs at him
and Fucks the dragon.
guarded by a dragon. Here is the end of the story
with different kind of metalheads as knights.
POWER METAL
The protagonist arrives riding a white unicorn,
escapes from the dragon, saves the princess and
makes love to her in an enchanted forest.
THRASH METAL
The protagonist arrives, fights the dragon, saves
the princess and fucks her.
HEAVY METAL
The protagonist arrives on a Harley, kills the
dragon, drinks a few beers and fucks the princess.
FOLK METAL
The protagonist arrives with some friends playing
accordions, violins, flutes and many more weird
instruments, the dragon falls asleep (because of all
the dancing). Then all leave... without the princess.
VIKING METAL
The protagonist arrives in a ship, kills the dragon
with his mighty axe, skins the dragon and eats it,
rapes the princess to death, steals her belongings
and burns the castle before leaving.
DEATH METAL
The protagonist arrives, kills the dragon, fucks the
princess and kills her, then leaves.
BLACK METAL
The protagonist arrives at midnight, kills the dragon
and impales it in front of the castle. Then he
sodomizes the princess, drinks her blood in a ritual
before killing her. Then he impales the princess
next to the dragon.
GORE METAL
The protagonist arrives, kills the dragon and
spreads his guts in front of the castle, fucks the
princess and kills her.Then he fucks the dead body
again, slashes her belly and eats her guts. Then he
fucks the carcass for the third time, burns the
corpse and fucks it for the last time.
GRIND METAL
The protagonist arrives, screams something
completely undecipherable for about 2 minutes and
then leaves...
DOOM METAL
The protagonist arrives, sees the size of the dragon
and thinks he could never beat him, then he gets
depressed and commits suicide. The dragon eats
his body and the princess as dessert. That's the
end of the sad story.
GOTHIC METAL
The princess in a velvet costume starts singing
soprano. The protagonist completes the duet by
adding the beast part, while the dragon plays the
flute. Suddenly he swallows up the pipe and
accidentally scorches the beauty and the beast
and suffocates to death. All their souls are damned
in hell's eternity.
PROGRESSIVE METAL
The protagonist arrives with a guitar and plays a
solo of 26 minutes. The dragon kills himself out of
boredom. The protagonist arrives to the princess'
bedroom, plays another solo with all the
techniques and tunes he learned in the last year of
the conservatory. The princess escapes looking for
the 'HEAVY METAL' protagonist.
INDUSTRIAL METAL
The protagonist arrives wearing greasy overcoat,
makes obscene gestures towards dragon, and gets
escorted out of fairy tale land by security guards.
SPEED METAL
Suddenly there, short solo, dragon is confused,
someones screaming weird stuff, princess realizes
she's been deflowered, dragon and princess are
still looking for the one who did this.
CHRISTIAN METAL
The protagonist rides in on his way home from
church and sings a mushy power ballad to the
dragon about how much Jesus loves him and that
the dragon should turn to Him. The Dragon is
immediately converted, and when the princess
wants to "thank" the protagonist he replies, "sorry,
but I don't believe in having sex before marriage."
GLAM METAL
The protagonist arrives, the dragon laughs at the
guy's appearance and lets him enter. He steals the
princess' make up and tries to paint the castle in a
beautiful pink colour.
BATTLE METAL
The protagonist arrives with a legion of a hundred
brave footman, war chariots and a dozen elite
warriors and, as a master tactician, flanks the
dragon in a bloody siege that lasts six hours. The
princess gets bored.
NU METAL
The pussy arrives in a skateboard with baggy pants
and calls the dragon names, then he tries to run
away but burns to death when his moronic baggy
clothes catch fire, the princess then laughs at him
and Fucks the dragon.