(no subject)
We need to have a meeting as soon as possible. The Ministry is in an uproar; I've gotten at least fifty owls since yesterday, half of them demanding to know what happened and the other half insisting that I go after the Death Eaters that attacked Hogsmeade, even though we have no clue where they are.
Either way, we need to have a meeting. With everyone. We need Kingsley, Alastor, everyone there. As soon as possible.
If the Death Eaters are strong enough to attack a full fledged wizarding village near to Hogwarts, I'm afraid to find out what they're going to do next.
Are you all right? From yesterday, I mean...
How could we not have seen that this would happen? We were caught off guard, and....oh, the students, the poor students.....only a few years younger than I am, and we couldn't protect all of them.
What kind of Auror am I? How can I call myself an Auror if I cannot even guard those I've sworn to protect, and serve Dumbledore, the one who I've sworn allegiance to?
I haven't felt this much self-loathing since....oh, I don't even want to remember that.
I wish Sirius were here. I miss him...he was like a big brother to me. And whenever I'd be feeling down, he'd always turn into his dog form, and lick my face and hands, and let me hug him, and that was his special way of letting me know everything would be all right. But he's dead now, and I need to stop wishing he was here. This is a war, and people are going to die and get hurt, no matter how much it breaks my heart to see.
Being an Auror really isn't as easy and wonderful as it seems to be. Really. You think it's great to be fighting for a cause and doing it for the honor, but once you get out there....it's a lot more real than people think.
I think I'm going to go and see Remus now.