Memorial

[jncar]

Title: Memorial
Author: jncar
Rating & Warnings: PG-13/R, violence, gore, swearing, multiple character deaths
Prompts: Gubraithian fire; Mad-Eye, Ron, Bellatrix; Strip; Mystery/Suspense
Word Count: 7,897
Summary: After receiving a cryptic warning from Snape and discovering that Harry and several of his friends have gone missing, Remus must lead the

Comments

[author_by_night]

Oh, that was heartbreaking... but extremely well written.

I found Moody's line about needing answers, not hope interesting.

[jncar]

Thanks! Heartbreaking is pretty much what I was going for, so I'll take that as a compliment. :)

As far as that line from Moody, I kind of think that after all he's been through over the years he's kind of given up on virtues like "Hope" and "Optimism." I see him as a "just the facts" kind of guy who refuses to let emotions get in the way of analyzing and acting on the facts.

Thanks for commenting.

[no_sweeter_song]

I know you said you don't do Final Battle, and I'm personally kind of grateful you don't. I sat here and sobbed. Literally, tears streaming. The ending, with Remus realising that it was where the Potters' cottage was just sent me into shaking convulsions. Dean dying, Seamus by his side, Ron's outburst, and Tonks' final showdown with Bellatrix were also beautiful moments. I loved this, simply loved it.

[jncar]

I don't know if I should apologize for ruining your day or thank you for the gushing review!

Really, though, it means a lot to me that I was able to stir up your emotions, and I really appreciate your review. Thanks!

[no_sweeter_song]

Don't apologize! It was amazing, and I love when a good story moves me, even if it breaks my heart in the process. It's the mark of a great writer, after all.

[lady_bracknell]

This is a really brave attempt at a last battle scene - takes guts to kill off the hero ;).

I really liked it - I liked how confused and disconnected from events the Order were, and the way you wrote Remus really conveyed his sense of feeling inadequate to the challenge.

I thought the aftermath of battle scenes were really evocative too, a glimpse into what so many will wake to having lost in the morning, and the hollowness of 'winning' came over really well at the end. Left me with a real feeling of catharsis.

[jncar]

Thank you! This was "worst case scenario" for the last battle, and I do hope that JKR goes in a less angsty more triumphant direction with her's. :)

I'm glad you enjoyed it.

[anoipua]

oh wow. That was so...sad doesn't seem to cover it. You did a marvelous job with the imagery and emotion in this. I love that Remus can look at Tonks and know that she's going to be upset later, but can't deal with it now. Fantastic.

This is so well written, especially considering you feel the need to revise. Bravo!

[jncar]

Thank you so much! I'm happy to hear that the imagery and emotion are effective in this.

This is so well written, especially considering you feel the need to revise.

Maybe it's a case of being my own worst critic? ;)

[shimotsuki]

You've done a marvelous job with suspense here -- you had me nervous and twitching from the beginning, and you sustained that mood all the way through. At the end, when you had Remus staring into the fire, full of thoughts of how he had failed, I was sure you were going to have him step right into it. Thank goodness for Tonks, leading him away -- it's tempting to hope that's a symbol that they'll help each other handle things in the future as well

[jncar]

Thank you so much for the thoughtful review! I'm really glad the suspense worked for you. I knew the "mystery" aspect was a little weak so I worked hard to play up the suspense, and it's so nice to know that work paid off. :)

I'm also glad to hear you liked the way I slipped in the little details about what had happened since HBP. I was a little worried about doing a backstory overload.

I'm really glad you liked it. Thanks! :D