Comments | metamorfic_moon: Animal Magnetism, by celtmama

an_fhanai in metamorfic_moon

Animal Magnetism, by celtmama

Oct 26, 2006 06:26

Title: Animal Magnetism
Author: celtmama
Rating & Warnings: PG-13, for language
Prompts: Gringotts; Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them; a day of romance; romantic comedy
Word Count: a little over 7,000
Summary: Remus and Tonks are on the brink of admitting their growing feelings for one another, when Tonks finds herself pitted against a completely ( Read more... )

half moon rising fic jumble, romantic comedy, celtmama

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an_fhanai October 26 2006, 16:29:13 UTC

so I don't ever want to hear you moaning and groaning about that genre again, d'you hear?

Yes'm. ;)

Thanks for the awesome comments - honestly, I thought there was more to dislike about it, but it rocks that you took away that much from the story. I think I need to read it again when it's not the wee hours of the morning.

My one bit of concrit is that they were so subtly sexy throughout, and the ending was so romantic and sweet, but I felt slightly cheated that they didn't actually kiss.

Bugger...

This is my own stubborness showing through. I struggled over the issue of the kiss for days, and I finally decided that in the little universe of my own characters, I didn't want this piece to be the "first kiss" story. So I didn't, thinking that it would work simply ending it with their mutual attraction finally being openly acknowledged. I played with the idea of doing a little one-shot follow up, where they explore the "something fantastic". On the other hand, it had also occurred to me to have the ending directly echoing the opening sequence...aargh...need to think about this.

I agree that if I were the reader, I would feel completely cheated by the ending. I'm so torn! Is it really lopsided without it?

mrstater October 26 2006, 16:46:41 UTC

In my opinion, the whole story reads as a first kiss story: with Remus thinking about it at the beginning, and Tonks' repeated promise of something fantastic, it just seems that the natural conclusion is some sort of physical payoff for the sexual tension.

an_fhanai October 26 2006, 17:12:30 UTC

No, you're right - it's a bit like yanking the rug out from underneath the reader by not having the story culminate in a kiss. I'll see what I can come up with. :)

mrstater October 26 2006, 17:15:09 UTC

May I vote for the eyelashes to come in? I love that description...

an_fhanai October 26 2006, 18:08:07 UTC

Me too. I will certainly include them if I can - there's something about eyelashes that's soooo sensual.

First kiss an_fhanai August 6 2010, 20:22:01 UTC

No, I disagree. I think it was great without the kiss. It leaves some mystery and excitement. Plus, it makes me so impatient to read more of your stories about thier relationship! Don't change the ending...its so sweet.

Also, you have done an absolute superb job with grasping the characters, hp universe, and the Order. And the plot is excellent as well. Thanks so much for this great piece of work. If there was anything I would request you to change, it would be the strong language Tonks used in the library.

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