darkness

[metallicpenguin]

my life is nothing but darkness. i'm so depressed over this teaching thing. and lately all i do is drink (never get drunk but do drink) and think about how much i wanna have sex. last night it got so bad that i called and e-mailed the guy i had a really dumb one night thing with last year. the guy that practically wanted to rape me, just to see if he was interested in hooking up. that is not me! who the hell was in my body and mind last night? luckily he didn't pick up his phone, and i retracted the e-mail before he got it.

i'm a mess. i need help, but what kind? and from whom?