Confused
Well let's see, my kids and I have been living with my friend & her family for about a month now. It's gots it's ups & downs but over all I'm grateful to have a place to stay espceically considering I lost my job about a week ago. And since it was pt and temporary I cannot get unemployment from it. Dont want it would rather have a stable job anyways. Things with Jesse seem to be the same. I think he's doing better then bam, something else comes up. So glad I decided not to live with him. It would be the same ol shit all over again.
On that note, my current relationship is well confusing. I guess it's because I'm use to having someone around(well living with). It's hard. I hate how everything is right now. Sometime's I wonder if our relatipnship is as meaningful to him as it is to me. Then at times I just want to give up & say "fuck it". I talk to him alot about my problems and he's been so understanding about it. Even though my kids are not his, he has their interest at heart as well. Is respectful of my wishes and concerns. He's awesome to say the least. But still I wonder, he say's he loves me, and I want to believe it but I just don't know. I know he cares for me. Maybe I'm too loving and caring.
Or I'm just a fuck up. Who know's I'm good at that.
I think I'm just going to give up fuck it all.
I can't seem to do a damn thing right.
On that note, my current relationship is well confusing. I guess it's because I'm use to having someone around(well living with). It's hard. I hate how everything is right now. Sometime's I wonder if our relatipnship is as meaningful to him as it is to me. Then at times I just want to give up & say "fuck it". I talk to him alot about my problems and he's been so understanding about it. Even though my kids are not his, he has their interest at heart as well. Is respectful of my wishes and concerns. He's awesome to say the least. But still I wonder, he say's he loves me, and I want to believe it but I just don't know. I know he cares for me. Maybe I'm too loving and caring.
Or I'm just a fuck up. Who know's I'm good at that.
I think I'm just going to give up fuck it all.
I can't seem to do a damn thing right.