A post that's been rattling around in my head for a while, loosened by drink...

[metallian]

Some of the most important qualities in a romantic partner are judgment, wisdom, reasonability, and communication skills. I'd say deficiencies in these areas account for most of the relationship-related complaints I hear about from people of all genders and sexual orientations. The best relationships I see excel in these respects. They are among

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[rivet_geek]

Coming out of a relationship (read: getting divorced as in "All right? No marriage counseling, no trial separation, I'm going to get fucking divorced, okay?") where the other partner was deficient in all of those areas - and in a budding relationship with someone who has all four of those traits in leaps and bounds - I have to say that these traits are not portrayed as positive or attractive. Women are supposed to be emotional, fickle, irrational, "PMSing", "psycho" and a whole host of other traits. They're supposed to obsess over the love of their life, expect to be the center of their man's world, and take the slightest little things out of context. They're supposed to be lied to if they ask if they look fat or if you think that other chick is hot.

If you can tell, I've been thinking on similar subject matter lately and probably from the same side of the fence - that I seem to have found someone with those qualities and I'm amazed at the difference in the quality of the relationship, even if it's only a casual one. I can tell her about some girl that I saw (like the one today at work that you could see through her dress when sunlight shone through it) and when she asks "Was she hot?" it's not a trick question and I can give an honest answer without her going psycho on me.

[metallian]

mrsmetallian calls the stereotypical (mostly bad!) ways in which men and women are supposed to behave towards one another in relationships the "Stand-Up Comedy Version of Gender Relations." It's not something we care to see promoted, but there it is.