Relief
Well well well, recently life has been rather good if i do say so myself. work has been okay, nothing too unbareable fortunatly, ive been doing more school work and taking my tests, so far ive taken 3 tests since ive re-started and i got a 90, 93, and a 100! woo for nick, i cant wait untill i get this done so i can start looking for jobs and checking off the "do you have a high school diploma" box in the application, all is well.
I did ALOT of thinking recently and decided that letting go of some things is probably the best route too take, ive been dealing with the same emotions for far too long now and im just getting sick of the same old shit....i needed a serious change or something and i think i got it finally. it really does feel good to not have to worry about the same stuff all the time, my major flaw was that i kept doing certain things out of routine because i didnt know what else to do otherwise. but theres been things goin on that make me realize that all this work that i put towards something that i dont get anything out of is just a huge waste of time and energy, so i have trued to focus all this towards other things like my school work, and other things that matter and will give me something back in return which im not used too at all.
you know how when your younger you find change or even now a days when you empty your pockets and put all the loose change into a jar or a piggy bank....you keep doing it and doing it and doing it, and when the time comes you can open that jar and get a whole lot of money and it feels good. well ive been doing that for a couple years now, only not with money, ive been putting alot of myself into something and when i get to open that jar or whatever it is, theres nothing in it, i get nothing out of it, and thats what made me realize that there are things more important in life and things that will give back...or for that matter, things that will be more gratefull for it. i dont expect anyone to understand what im saying right now, but oh well, theres plenty that i want to say but none of it will make any sence to anyone i dont think.
what it all breaks down to is that if im going to put my time and energy into something i expect there to be an outcome and so far there hasnt been one, so from now on, no time and no energy will be spent on something not worth it, so fuck yourself. whew
everyone is back from college and im happy because that means theres more people to hang out with and more ideas to go arround instead of the usual ones....hopefully this summer will be fun and exciting like it should be. i would really like ti start filming things that are my ideas but no one who would do it with me ever has the initiative to do it, for reasons un known. but whatever, dodgeball will reign supreme this summer and we will rule all. i hope we get to play tonight and i hope we get to get some more balls becuase we managed to pop 2 and lose three last night apparently. nut whatever, life goes on, im outta here. Peace.
-Nick-
*PLEASE LEAVE SOME COMMENTS I FEEL UNLOVED*
I did ALOT of thinking recently and decided that letting go of some things is probably the best route too take, ive been dealing with the same emotions for far too long now and im just getting sick of the same old shit....i needed a serious change or something and i think i got it finally. it really does feel good to not have to worry about the same stuff all the time, my major flaw was that i kept doing certain things out of routine because i didnt know what else to do otherwise. but theres been things goin on that make me realize that all this work that i put towards something that i dont get anything out of is just a huge waste of time and energy, so i have trued to focus all this towards other things like my school work, and other things that matter and will give me something back in return which im not used too at all.
you know how when your younger you find change or even now a days when you empty your pockets and put all the loose change into a jar or a piggy bank....you keep doing it and doing it and doing it, and when the time comes you can open that jar and get a whole lot of money and it feels good. well ive been doing that for a couple years now, only not with money, ive been putting alot of myself into something and when i get to open that jar or whatever it is, theres nothing in it, i get nothing out of it, and thats what made me realize that there are things more important in life and things that will give back...or for that matter, things that will be more gratefull for it. i dont expect anyone to understand what im saying right now, but oh well, theres plenty that i want to say but none of it will make any sence to anyone i dont think.
what it all breaks down to is that if im going to put my time and energy into something i expect there to be an outcome and so far there hasnt been one, so from now on, no time and no energy will be spent on something not worth it, so fuck yourself. whew
everyone is back from college and im happy because that means theres more people to hang out with and more ideas to go arround instead of the usual ones....hopefully this summer will be fun and exciting like it should be. i would really like ti start filming things that are my ideas but no one who would do it with me ever has the initiative to do it, for reasons un known. but whatever, dodgeball will reign supreme this summer and we will rule all. i hope we get to play tonight and i hope we get to get some more balls becuase we managed to pop 2 and lose three last night apparently. nut whatever, life goes on, im outta here. Peace.
-Nick-
*PLEASE LEAVE SOME COMMENTS I FEEL UNLOVED*