I can see most of these things happening
Dear Santa...
Dear Santa,
This year I've been busy!
Last Tuesday I set born_of_desire's puppy on fire (-66 points). In November I pulled ardensseptember's hair (-5 points). In September I punched tinkerbell103 in the arm (-10 points). In February I turned imperialslug in for running naked in the mall (3 points). In July I donated bone marrow to dramageeky in a life-saving procedure (300 points).
Overall, I've been nice (222 points). For Christmas I deserve a new bike!
Sincerely,
metal4ever4life