In the night.
The last thing I remember was laying down to fall asleep. A rerun of House was playing on the TV and I was exhausted from a long day. That much I know. Right now I'm a bit confused. This place is familiar but...how did I get here?
After realizing I was somewhere I shouldn't be, I had to put the pieces together. There was loud music, people with pizza, and everyone was roller skating.
Oh my God, I thought to myself.
I started to sprint to the nearest bathroom and fell flat on my face. I was also wearing roller skates.
"Please no," I begged as I got up and made my way to the restroom. Looking into the mirror my fears were confirmed. I was eleven years old and at the local roller rink, the Roller Barn. What is going on, I thought.
"I finally travel through time and this is where I end up?" I said to my reflection. My acne was just as bad as I remembered it. My bowl-cut hair was worse. What the hell am I going to do here?
You like to think that when you travel back in time you'd do something productive. Solve an old mystery, prevent a horrible event from taking place, maybe even make yourself a shit-ton of money. Once I was there though, nostalgia really took over any other motivations and I found myself just enjoying a memory.
I always thought when I went back in time that I would get to be my own age and just act as an observer. That definitely would have been preferable, but I guess this will do. As I walk back out into the roller rink I'm surprised by all the details I had missed before.
I know these people. I'm looking at dozens of friends from over a decade ago. Some people I even still talk to! I could warn some of these people about bad relationships and horrible accidents! Would that even work? Would anything I try to change only set those events into motion? Now my head hurts and feel like I'm stuck in an episode of Lost. What was it Mr. Ecko had said to Locke, "Don't confuse coincidence with fate"? Maybe this is all an accident.
That's when it happened. I was snapped out of my daze by an announcement on the speaker system. As the lights dimmed I heard those words that haunted my juvenile psyche for years.
It was time to clear the skating rink for "couple's skate only". I could almost scream. I was being tortured. My initial reaction was to tuck myself away in a corner. I could pump a few quarters into that Ms. Pac-Man cabinet and pretend this wasn't happening. After the initial fear had washed away, I wondered why I couldn't just ask someone to skate with me. It's a strange sensation, having your adult mind inside your much younger body. I felt like I was in a constant struggle to stay in control. Who knows, maybe that's what changing the future feels like.
Then I saw her. Goddamnit, what's her name? Her hair is shorter in the future but that's her alright. She was beautiful in the way kids found other kids beautiful. I had a crush on this girl far longer then I would feel comfortable admitting. I wonder if this is why I was brought here. I wanted to ask her to skate with me, but every compulsion in my body told me that was a bad idea. It was that moment that I realized I WASN'T here as an observer. I was in control, and there must be a reason for that. Space/time paradoxes be damned, I was going to couple skate with this girl!
It's hard to saunter when you're eleven years old and even harder when your on roller skates, but I'm pretty sure I did a good job. She was looking at me (which I took as a good sign) and smiled when I got to her (even better sign). If I remember her name it would really help me out a lot, but for now I'll just have to fake it.
"Care to..."
"Do you wan..."
We ended up speaking at the same time. Of course we both did that nervous giggle thing.
Jesus, I'm in a John Hughes movie! That's what happened. The lost spirit of John Hughes is roaming the earth and has taken me back in time. Does that make him the spirit of romantic-comedy past? Why did he choose me? I really think I'm starting to lose my mind now. I need to focus here, this is important.
"Care to skate with me?" I asked nervously. I can't help but notice how she's twirling her hair around her finger and think about how bizarre this really is.
"Uhhh duh," was her response.
I couldn't help but laugh. Why did we stop saying "duh"? Oh yea, cause it was annoying as all hell.
The first song was almost over and I felt really good about myself. It's going by fast, but I've managed to not only go back in time, but to conquer an old fear. Pretty productive day, if I do say so myself. Maybe I'll buy stock in Apple while I'm here after all. I wonder how much my piggy bank has in it...
I'm shaken from my self admiration when the last song of couple skate comes on.
Bryan Adams is ringing through my ears and I hear the sweet lyrics of "Heaven" booming through the rink.
Damn you Bryan Adams! You always do this to me! My entire life in plagued by your music putting me in romantic situations that I'm too awkward to handle!
She slowly lets go of my hand and starts to skate backwards in front of me so we're facing. A skill I never managed to figure out. After coming around a turn we slow down and rest against one of the side walls.
If we want to go over all around uncomfortable situations, here I am in my youth with a girl I swooned over for years and years, I have my adult consciousness trapped in my body and she's about to kiss me. I'm twenty-six years old! How am I supposed to get out of this?
I close my eyes and just wish it all to be over.
The music is getting louder "I'm findin' it hard to believe..."
My heartbeat is in my throat.
"...we're in heaven."
There's no flash of light. No journey through a wormhole. Suddenly, I'm sitting up in my room. Drenched in a cold sweat. My cat is at my feet, and somewhat upset at having just been woken up. I feel...dizzy. I wipe my sweat from my face and can tell I have a fever.
What the hell happened to me? Did I stop the robot apocalypse?
After realizing I was somewhere I shouldn't be, I had to put the pieces together. There was loud music, people with pizza, and everyone was roller skating.
Oh my God, I thought to myself.
I started to sprint to the nearest bathroom and fell flat on my face. I was also wearing roller skates.
"Please no," I begged as I got up and made my way to the restroom. Looking into the mirror my fears were confirmed. I was eleven years old and at the local roller rink, the Roller Barn. What is going on, I thought.
"I finally travel through time and this is where I end up?" I said to my reflection. My acne was just as bad as I remembered it. My bowl-cut hair was worse. What the hell am I going to do here?
You like to think that when you travel back in time you'd do something productive. Solve an old mystery, prevent a horrible event from taking place, maybe even make yourself a shit-ton of money. Once I was there though, nostalgia really took over any other motivations and I found myself just enjoying a memory.
I always thought when I went back in time that I would get to be my own age and just act as an observer. That definitely would have been preferable, but I guess this will do. As I walk back out into the roller rink I'm surprised by all the details I had missed before.
I know these people. I'm looking at dozens of friends from over a decade ago. Some people I even still talk to! I could warn some of these people about bad relationships and horrible accidents! Would that even work? Would anything I try to change only set those events into motion? Now my head hurts and feel like I'm stuck in an episode of Lost. What was it Mr. Ecko had said to Locke, "Don't confuse coincidence with fate"? Maybe this is all an accident.
That's when it happened. I was snapped out of my daze by an announcement on the speaker system. As the lights dimmed I heard those words that haunted my juvenile psyche for years.
It was time to clear the skating rink for "couple's skate only". I could almost scream. I was being tortured. My initial reaction was to tuck myself away in a corner. I could pump a few quarters into that Ms. Pac-Man cabinet and pretend this wasn't happening. After the initial fear had washed away, I wondered why I couldn't just ask someone to skate with me. It's a strange sensation, having your adult mind inside your much younger body. I felt like I was in a constant struggle to stay in control. Who knows, maybe that's what changing the future feels like.
Then I saw her. Goddamnit, what's her name? Her hair is shorter in the future but that's her alright. She was beautiful in the way kids found other kids beautiful. I had a crush on this girl far longer then I would feel comfortable admitting. I wonder if this is why I was brought here. I wanted to ask her to skate with me, but every compulsion in my body told me that was a bad idea. It was that moment that I realized I WASN'T here as an observer. I was in control, and there must be a reason for that. Space/time paradoxes be damned, I was going to couple skate with this girl!
It's hard to saunter when you're eleven years old and even harder when your on roller skates, but I'm pretty sure I did a good job. She was looking at me (which I took as a good sign) and smiled when I got to her (even better sign). If I remember her name it would really help me out a lot, but for now I'll just have to fake it.
"Care to..."
"Do you wan..."
We ended up speaking at the same time. Of course we both did that nervous giggle thing.
Jesus, I'm in a John Hughes movie! That's what happened. The lost spirit of John Hughes is roaming the earth and has taken me back in time. Does that make him the spirit of romantic-comedy past? Why did he choose me? I really think I'm starting to lose my mind now. I need to focus here, this is important.
"Care to skate with me?" I asked nervously. I can't help but notice how she's twirling her hair around her finger and think about how bizarre this really is.
"Uhhh duh," was her response.
I couldn't help but laugh. Why did we stop saying "duh"? Oh yea, cause it was annoying as all hell.
The first song was almost over and I felt really good about myself. It's going by fast, but I've managed to not only go back in time, but to conquer an old fear. Pretty productive day, if I do say so myself. Maybe I'll buy stock in Apple while I'm here after all. I wonder how much my piggy bank has in it...
I'm shaken from my self admiration when the last song of couple skate comes on.
Bryan Adams is ringing through my ears and I hear the sweet lyrics of "Heaven" booming through the rink.
Damn you Bryan Adams! You always do this to me! My entire life in plagued by your music putting me in romantic situations that I'm too awkward to handle!
She slowly lets go of my hand and starts to skate backwards in front of me so we're facing. A skill I never managed to figure out. After coming around a turn we slow down and rest against one of the side walls.
If we want to go over all around uncomfortable situations, here I am in my youth with a girl I swooned over for years and years, I have my adult consciousness trapped in my body and she's about to kiss me. I'm twenty-six years old! How am I supposed to get out of this?
I close my eyes and just wish it all to be over.
The music is getting louder "I'm findin' it hard to believe..."
My heartbeat is in my throat.
"...we're in heaven."
There's no flash of light. No journey through a wormhole. Suddenly, I'm sitting up in my room. Drenched in a cold sweat. My cat is at my feet, and somewhat upset at having just been woken up. I feel...dizzy. I wipe my sweat from my face and can tell I have a fever.
What the hell happened to me? Did I stop the robot apocalypse?