"I am a defeatist"
I'm so fukking pissed off at myself right now, i just three days off work and I wasted al of them, not a single one was of any use, its just like me.
And now I'm back here i'm not much better, nothing is going right, i keep fukking up, im having to do ewvery board 4-5 times over. i just never can get it right first time, its the same with everything else, it always takes forever befor i can get soething right, i never get it first or even second time, i made a pigs ear of cooking for my family last night and i've cooked several times befor each time madea right hash of it.
Now work isn't iportant my job means nothing to me, but the knowledge that i cant do a simple task right first, second, third time. And other things i dont care about but some really matter to me.
Like Jade,
Ok this is going to sound pathetic and lame and shitty but its the truth and fuck you lot anyway.
If i was to get together with her, like i want to she would be mmy first girlfriend ever, and i dont want ot fuck that up. yeah see fukking pathetic i'm 19 for christs sake. And i'm going nuts over her, its so fuking dumb.
I should have text her back last night, fukking being tired i should have txt her back.
Last night was hell i slept in 1 hour burst then stayede awake for and hour or so, each time i woke up it was agony, i couldn't stpo tossing and turning i was far too hot, i just couildn't rest i just was so tired.
I dont feel very well, not at all, and not just in my stomach, my hands keep shakking and i cant stop grabing the top of my head or face, i cant get anything right.
And now I'm back here i'm not much better, nothing is going right, i keep fukking up, im having to do ewvery board 4-5 times over. i just never can get it right first time, its the same with everything else, it always takes forever befor i can get soething right, i never get it first or even second time, i made a pigs ear of cooking for my family last night and i've cooked several times befor each time madea right hash of it.
Now work isn't iportant my job means nothing to me, but the knowledge that i cant do a simple task right first, second, third time. And other things i dont care about but some really matter to me.
Like Jade,
Ok this is going to sound pathetic and lame and shitty but its the truth and fuck you lot anyway.
If i was to get together with her, like i want to she would be mmy first girlfriend ever, and i dont want ot fuck that up. yeah see fukking pathetic i'm 19 for christs sake. And i'm going nuts over her, its so fuking dumb.
I should have text her back last night, fukking being tired i should have txt her back.
Last night was hell i slept in 1 hour burst then stayede awake for and hour or so, each time i woke up it was agony, i couldn't stpo tossing and turning i was far too hot, i just couildn't rest i just was so tired.
I dont feel very well, not at all, and not just in my stomach, my hands keep shakking and i cant stop grabing the top of my head or face, i cant get anything right.