i sure am a little sneek!
We rented unfaithful...and she does cheat on richard. that poor man. I love richard. i really do.
i'm at tyler's house right now and tyler isn't here. it's really kind of weird because he left about ... 20 minutes ago, for his guitar lesson...and i stayed here. His mom is at work and his dad has work buddies over here working on....work things. And i'm in the basement.
Hm... 2 more days. || that's it.
||
and tomorrow, there will be one day... |
it's just hard.
and i've been thinking about bailey...i don't know.... she seems to be not handling things very well...or i mean, i suppose as well as can be expected. ... i don't know. i just see her, and i feel like i can gauge (sp?) how i'm going to be by looking at her...and i feel like if that's bailey....i'm going to be so bad i won't be able to even function. it sucks.
But we went to edge yesterday. It's funny. I really like seeing everyone. I really do. I miss hanging with most of my old friends. I think it's funny when they're like.. "MERYN!!! OH MY GOSHHH!!!" and they ask how i am, and i tell them i'm doing fine. Because really...i'm fine! i'm probably the happiest i've ever been right now in this moment. I'm doing really really well. And then they go, "but really, meryn...how ARE you?? are you doing alright?" like they expect me to be like "oh my gosh, i'm so unhappy, i need to get back into god." and really...i'm doing really well actually, and there isn't any sob story, and i'm doing excellent! so...whatever. I really want to hang out with amanda. i need to give her back her shoes. i was knd of hoping she'd forgotten all about them...because i love those silver shoes. i wear them all the time. lol. but the right thing to do is to give them back.
hm...i talked with matt today. That was nice. I guess he's doing well on the girlfriend front. He's met a nice new cheerleader girl...she's probably tall and skinny and blonde, because that's what he likes. And...then he was telling me that a friend of his died in a car accident. She was hit by a UPS truck. I guess...it's an exciting way to go...ya know? Like, she didn't just fall asleep and die...she was hit by a UPS truck. I hope i'm hit by a UPS truck...everyone would hear about it. I'm not trying to make light of the situation...i'm just... i don't know. talking out of my ass.
it's really weird being at tyler's house, in his room...with insence burning....but he's not here. This is what it's going to be like when he leaves. only his room will be cleaner. i hate to be so depressing...but i sure am going to miss that boy.
i feel bad that all summer i've sort of ditched my friends. I hope they understand. I mean....i want to spend as much time with tyler as i possibly can right now. And i feel sort of guilty, because as soon as he's gone i'm going to need my friends at my side 24/7. I'm going to need people to keep me occupied so i don't turn into one big huge blubbering ball of tear and snot filled kleenex. I want to hang out with bailey, elise, celina, stephanie, tania, beth, thor, zach, kyle resto..? Zach hanson is leaving soon too. I need to get together with him.
Jamie budnick got hot. I don't care what anyone says. She is SO pretty now. SO SO SOOO pretty. Boys -> catch her while you can.
Oh, also....GUESS WHAT MOM?!?! i snuck tyler over last night!!! guess what else? he was hiding behind my chair when you came in to my room at 145 to check on me. you didn't even see. MWAHAHAHA.
guess what else mom? he snuck over the night before that too.
sometimes i don't like my mom, and sometimes i love my mom. all the time i love my mom...sometimes i don't like my mom. always, most of the time tyler's mom bugs me. i always like tyler's dad. he's awesome.
i'm going to take a nap now.