(no subject)
so today wasnt exactly wonderful. i thought yesterday would be the hard day but it turns out today was. yesterday was actually pretty decent. i did my best to just go with it and be optimistic and take what comes .. plus the game last night was amazing, im so glad we won :]
but today was really hard for some reason. maybe today is when it really hit me what happened and stuff. and it might not be that big a deal but its just really hard to accept some things that i feel that ive known forever but now must come to terms with. its very difficult to watch the way hes so much happier and not get a pit in my stomach. i feel like maybe stuff wont ever go back to the way it was, and that worse, he wont want it to. if you're reading this, well... then your reading it and i dont mind because its just my way of .. dealin with it i guess!
so today i wasnt very happy which bothered me more because it was a fun day at school with the basketball game and the physics and the english stuff. but oh well, what can ya do. ill just try harder next week to be normal and regular, its just hard sometimes to pretend like i never heard those words.
anyways children.. bleh. ive resorted to livejournal rambling, whats the world coming to???
but today was really hard for some reason. maybe today is when it really hit me what happened and stuff. and it might not be that big a deal but its just really hard to accept some things that i feel that ive known forever but now must come to terms with. its very difficult to watch the way hes so much happier and not get a pit in my stomach. i feel like maybe stuff wont ever go back to the way it was, and that worse, he wont want it to. if you're reading this, well... then your reading it and i dont mind because its just my way of .. dealin with it i guess!
so today i wasnt very happy which bothered me more because it was a fun day at school with the basketball game and the physics and the english stuff. but oh well, what can ya do. ill just try harder next week to be normal and regular, its just hard sometimes to pretend like i never heard those words.
anyways children.. bleh. ive resorted to livejournal rambling, whats the world coming to???