Stewing in my fears...
Once again contemplations on the aggressive part of my scene has me nervous. My palms getting sweaty. I look at the images of the judges and what they've contributed to their and my community as a whole. I imagine all sorts of expressions on their faces. With a desire to be able to show that I belong. That I'm not just some novice who has dreams of a title with nothing planned to do with it. My fears tell me that I am too green and have no idea what I'm getting in to.
Many of the fantasies I entertained have various forms of aggression in them. There is a power dynamic, for sure. I have read and looked through pictures of edgier fantasy performances that have been well received. None of them for a title, even so my rational mind tells me that mine will belong just fine. I need to enhance the romance. I need to make the lasting effect of the fantasy the power play with the romance not the aggression, if I am to present myself as a good representative for this BDSM and vanilla community.
Edit 04/02/10: So for whatever reason, even though I demo at these clubs, I forgot that we can't have impact or role-played impact in a club with a bar and now will need to rework the death scenes of my two thugs in the fantasy because I can't bludgeon them to death. *laugh* :)
Many of the fantasies I entertained have various forms of aggression in them. There is a power dynamic, for sure. I have read and looked through pictures of edgier fantasy performances that have been well received. None of them for a title, even so my rational mind tells me that mine will belong just fine. I need to enhance the romance. I need to make the lasting effect of the fantasy the power play with the romance not the aggression, if I am to present myself as a good representative for this BDSM and vanilla community.
Edit 04/02/10: So for whatever reason, even though I demo at these clubs, I forgot that we can't have impact or role-played impact in a club with a bar and now will need to rework the death scenes of my two thugs in the fantasy because I can't bludgeon them to death. *laugh* :)