(no subject)
So there's me...
And there's this guy...
And there's this other guy...
A "love triangle"--if you will.
Again.
For the fourth time.
Why?
Why now?
When I finally thought I was happy with what I had, it turned out to be an illusion.
Again.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Yes, this isn't the first time.
The first time I regret. I will for the rest of my life, I think.
The wound is still open, and every time I see him it hurts. Right in my heart it hurts.
I get kind of jealous when I see him with other girls, but I know we're over.
I know nothing will ever be there again.
I know this becasue I don't love him anymore.
Not like I used to.
He's more a crazy older brother now.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
It just seems that I'm not meant to be happy.
I'm sure that's not what this all about; that fate just wants me to find the right person, but...
I don't think I can take it.
If this happens every time I think I'll be happy...
I don't know what I'll do.
I just don't know.
Right now I just have to admit to my feelings.
I don't love him.
I don't think I ever did.
Just a crush.
A fickle, middle school crush.
And all I can say is...I'm sorry.
For what? I don't know.
But I am.
Truly, deeply, sorry.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
But, there are problems.
As there always are.
I don't think he feels the same way.
He might, but I don't know.
It's too early to tell.
It's too early to tell anything right now, but I do know one thing:
I'm just so confused.
I don't know what to do...
I hoping this will pass like it did last time.
But I don't think it will.
I just need time away from both to think.
I'm hoping this summer will be that time.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
If you can offer an words of adice, that'd be great.
I just don't know what to do right now.
I need help.
.::~Cheza~::.
And there's this guy...
And there's this other guy...
A "love triangle"--if you will.
Again.
For the fourth time.
Why?
Why now?
When I finally thought I was happy with what I had, it turned out to be an illusion.
Again.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Yes, this isn't the first time.
The first time I regret. I will for the rest of my life, I think.
The wound is still open, and every time I see him it hurts. Right in my heart it hurts.
I get kind of jealous when I see him with other girls, but I know we're over.
I know nothing will ever be there again.
I know this becasue I don't love him anymore.
Not like I used to.
He's more a crazy older brother now.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
It just seems that I'm not meant to be happy.
I'm sure that's not what this all about; that fate just wants me to find the right person, but...
I don't think I can take it.
If this happens every time I think I'll be happy...
I don't know what I'll do.
I just don't know.
Right now I just have to admit to my feelings.
I don't love him.
I don't think I ever did.
Just a crush.
A fickle, middle school crush.
And all I can say is...I'm sorry.
For what? I don't know.
But I am.
Truly, deeply, sorry.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
But, there are problems.
As there always are.
I don't think he feels the same way.
He might, but I don't know.
It's too early to tell.
It's too early to tell anything right now, but I do know one thing:
I'm just so confused.
I don't know what to do...
I hoping this will pass like it did last time.
But I don't think it will.
I just need time away from both to think.
I'm hoping this summer will be that time.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
If you can offer an words of adice, that'd be great.
I just don't know what to do right now.
I need help.
.::~Cheza~::.