Fic: The Drugs Don't Work
Title: The Drugs Don't Work
Rating: PG-13
Warnings/Spoilers: Single use of strong language, recovery from drug addiction.
Summary: Written for the dailyfics comm under the prompt 'Addiction'. In modern-day London, Arthur cares for a fragile Merlin, who is recovering from his descent into drug abuse. Pre-slash, part of a longer WIP- if you want the full version to happen, I'd like it if you encouraged me.
Also on AO3.
'Merlin?'
No response, bar some quiet -was that Britpop?- humming away upstairs.
'Merlin?' Arthur called again, setting aside his keys and coat. He opted to follow the noise.
Of course Merlin was home. Merlin was always home. It was just, every time Arthur came back from work, there was just the slightest fear that he might not return to Merlin in the same state he left him in.
Despite the fact that it was clearly what Merlin was, Arthur had pushed the label of 'drug addict' aside weeks ago, in favour of 'unconventional lodger'. He didn't pay any rent and wasn't allowed out on his own for fear he return to his old ways. He didn't do any chores, but he didn't really make a mess, either. He didn't do an awful lot at all.
Except, perhaps, threaten to kill himself on a virtually daily basis. So, when Arthur pushed the bathroom door open to reveal a perfectly alive but completely naked Merlin lying in the bath, it was with an unbidden sigh of relief.
'What are you doing?' he asked, nearly laughing.
'Waiting to drown,' Merlin said.
The water was clear, almost up to his chin. Arthur, careful of Merlin's modesty, tested the water.
'This is freezing, Merlin!'
'I kept topping it up with hot,' Merlin explained. 'But I ran out of room.'
Arthur frowned.
'Why didn't you just let some of the old water out?'
Merlin shut his eyes for a moment. He didn't know at all.
'I'm done now anyway,' he sighed. 'Turn the stereo off for me?'
Arthur did so, bundling up the player's flex and carting it back to the dining room where it belonged.
'Can we go for a walk?' Merlin asked, appearing, dressed but damp, at the top of the stairs. 'I could walk for miles.'
'You might,' Arthur rubbed his eyes. 'I've been at work since eight thirty.'
Merlin had never asked what Arthur did for a living. It never occurred to him to do so. Addiction had brought with it a survival instinct which taught him to overlook the trivialities of other people's lives.
'And I've been locked in here since Tuesday,' he scowled.
'You know why.'
'Because crystal methamphetamine is just too delicious to resist.' Merlin slumped on the stairs. 'It's perfect, Arthur. It's ruined my life but I'll never be happy again without it. Not now I know.'
He snorted, 'Other people fall in love. I had meth. It's all just chemicals, fucking us up.'
'And who knew drug abuse could make you such a cynic?' Arthur said to himself. 'Are we going on this walk or not?'
'I'm not a dog,' Merlin scowled, shuffling down the stairs all the same.
'I'm going to need to eat,' Arthur said, once they were outside. It was a dark evening, even for the time of year.
'I'm not hungry,' Merlin complained. 'I could just walk for ever.'
'Merlin,' Arthur warned.
'Fine,' he kicked a can into the road. 'I wish I could just go without you.'
'And what would you do?' Arthur sighed.
'I'd go back to Morgana's old flat, and the meth, and not think twice about it.'
'The drugs don't work, Merlin. They just make you worse.'
'You sound like Will,' Merlin grumbled. 'Where are we eating?'
'What happened to Will?' Arthur asked.
'I lost him.'
Arthur felt guilty. He looked to Merlin's face for some sign of expression, but there was very little, as ever.
'I'm sorry,' Arthur said.
Merlin frowned for a second.
'Oh, no. I actually lost him. Drove him away, like I did everyone else, and like I will you.'
Arthur wanted to refute that. There was something about Merlin that made him seriously doubt he could ever give him up, but Will had been Merlin's best friend once too.
'What happened?'
'You want more stories?' Merlin asked. 'The fall and fall of Merlin Emrys?'
'Sorry. I just want to know how you ended up there... how Morgana ended up there. I haven't seen her in so long, but you did. You were there with her.'
'Alright. Tell me where we're eating and I'll sing in your ear again.'
Arthur looked around.
'I know a good Thai on Earl's Court Road?' he offered. 'Do you like cod?'
'I lived off cold beans for six weeks,' Merlin scowled. 'I take what I can get.'
'Come on. It's nice. Really nice.'
Merlin stretched.
'I'm sold. Let's go.'
Arthur couldn't cure Merlin with a nice piece of fish and a plate of ung choi, but it seemed to be helping. Every day, a little more magic came back into Merlin's eyes. Eventually, he might even learn to smile again. Arthur wished Merlin would.
Rating: PG-13
Warnings/Spoilers: Single use of strong language, recovery from drug addiction.
Summary: Written for the dailyfics comm under the prompt 'Addiction'. In modern-day London, Arthur cares for a fragile Merlin, who is recovering from his descent into drug abuse. Pre-slash, part of a longer WIP- if you want the full version to happen, I'd like it if you encouraged me.
Also on AO3.
'Merlin?'
No response, bar some quiet -was that Britpop?- humming away upstairs.
'Merlin?' Arthur called again, setting aside his keys and coat. He opted to follow the noise.
Of course Merlin was home. Merlin was always home. It was just, every time Arthur came back from work, there was just the slightest fear that he might not return to Merlin in the same state he left him in.
Despite the fact that it was clearly what Merlin was, Arthur had pushed the label of 'drug addict' aside weeks ago, in favour of 'unconventional lodger'. He didn't pay any rent and wasn't allowed out on his own for fear he return to his old ways. He didn't do any chores, but he didn't really make a mess, either. He didn't do an awful lot at all.
Except, perhaps, threaten to kill himself on a virtually daily basis. So, when Arthur pushed the bathroom door open to reveal a perfectly alive but completely naked Merlin lying in the bath, it was with an unbidden sigh of relief.
'What are you doing?' he asked, nearly laughing.
'Waiting to drown,' Merlin said.
The water was clear, almost up to his chin. Arthur, careful of Merlin's modesty, tested the water.
'This is freezing, Merlin!'
'I kept topping it up with hot,' Merlin explained. 'But I ran out of room.'
Arthur frowned.
'Why didn't you just let some of the old water out?'
Merlin shut his eyes for a moment. He didn't know at all.
'I'm done now anyway,' he sighed. 'Turn the stereo off for me?'
Arthur did so, bundling up the player's flex and carting it back to the dining room where it belonged.
'Can we go for a walk?' Merlin asked, appearing, dressed but damp, at the top of the stairs. 'I could walk for miles.'
'You might,' Arthur rubbed his eyes. 'I've been at work since eight thirty.'
Merlin had never asked what Arthur did for a living. It never occurred to him to do so. Addiction had brought with it a survival instinct which taught him to overlook the trivialities of other people's lives.
'And I've been locked in here since Tuesday,' he scowled.
'You know why.'
'Because crystal methamphetamine is just too delicious to resist.' Merlin slumped on the stairs. 'It's perfect, Arthur. It's ruined my life but I'll never be happy again without it. Not now I know.'
He snorted, 'Other people fall in love. I had meth. It's all just chemicals, fucking us up.'
'And who knew drug abuse could make you such a cynic?' Arthur said to himself. 'Are we going on this walk or not?'
'I'm not a dog,' Merlin scowled, shuffling down the stairs all the same.
'I'm going to need to eat,' Arthur said, once they were outside. It was a dark evening, even for the time of year.
'I'm not hungry,' Merlin complained. 'I could just walk for ever.'
'Merlin,' Arthur warned.
'Fine,' he kicked a can into the road. 'I wish I could just go without you.'
'And what would you do?' Arthur sighed.
'I'd go back to Morgana's old flat, and the meth, and not think twice about it.'
'The drugs don't work, Merlin. They just make you worse.'
'You sound like Will,' Merlin grumbled. 'Where are we eating?'
'What happened to Will?' Arthur asked.
'I lost him.'
Arthur felt guilty. He looked to Merlin's face for some sign of expression, but there was very little, as ever.
'I'm sorry,' Arthur said.
Merlin frowned for a second.
'Oh, no. I actually lost him. Drove him away, like I did everyone else, and like I will you.'
Arthur wanted to refute that. There was something about Merlin that made him seriously doubt he could ever give him up, but Will had been Merlin's best friend once too.
'What happened?'
'You want more stories?' Merlin asked. 'The fall and fall of Merlin Emrys?'
'Sorry. I just want to know how you ended up there... how Morgana ended up there. I haven't seen her in so long, but you did. You were there with her.'
'Alright. Tell me where we're eating and I'll sing in your ear again.'
Arthur looked around.
'I know a good Thai on Earl's Court Road?' he offered. 'Do you like cod?'
'I lived off cold beans for six weeks,' Merlin scowled. 'I take what I can get.'
'Come on. It's nice. Really nice.'
Merlin stretched.
'I'm sold. Let's go.'
Arthur couldn't cure Merlin with a nice piece of fish and a plate of ung choi, but it seemed to be helping. Every day, a little more magic came back into Merlin's eyes. Eventually, he might even learn to smile again. Arthur wished Merlin would.