[Even the most stable of people couldn't be expected to handle what Gamzee's had to deal with for the past few weeks and come out of it calm and sane, and Gamzee has never been really anchored in reality as it is. A few days of being chased by wraiths, finding out he'd attacked his moirail and hurt him badly, and then a week of being terrorized by
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Oh ... hello.
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Hey there, motherfucker. [His voice is soft, almost a purr.]
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It was ... Gamzee, right?
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Ah ... i-is it late? [He turns to look in the direction he thinks he heard the voice coming from.] I guess I lost track of the time.
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[There's that laugh again, and down the street ... something dart past an open doorway in one of the buildings. Something small, child sized, really, with the careless, slightly clumsy movement of a child, as well.]
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... Did you see that?
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[A shadowed head peers out from the doorway, then is pulled quickly back inside before any light can fall on her face ... it is clearly a small girl, though, unless little boys have started wearing pigtails.]
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[But he's too intently focused on the figure ahead to finish his sentence. His breath sticks in his throat; his heart pounds so hard he feels like it's shaking him as he takes another step forward, and another. The shadow looks too much like Nanako to deny, and yet ... ]
... That's not possible. [It's barely a murmur to himself. Souji seems to have forgotten all about Gamzee, at this point.]
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Big brother? [a soft voice calls, drifting down the street]
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He takes a deep breath and shakily exhales. His voice, usually so sturdy, trembles.]
... N-Nanako?
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What did you do, big brother?
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The question echoes in Souji's ears, and even though the figure's tone was quietly forlorn, Souji hears the accusation, feels the weight of it, heavy on his chest like a slab of rock, and it sends his head spinning with all the thoughts he'd been trying to suppress for months. i failed, i didn't save you, couldn't save you, couldn't be the leader they needed, couldn't be your big brother, wild card wild card empty empty empty nothing nothing -
Souji finds himself recalling every ghost story he's ever heard, every tale of vengeful spirits of the dead he's ever read, and he breaks into a cold sweat.]
Nanako ... no ... [shaking his head, taking a slow step back away from the shadow of the girl] .. I didn't ...
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What did you do?
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Every last nerve in his body screams run, run away, run far away, but he stands, rooted to the spot in his fear and guilt.]
I ... I tried to save you, Nanako. Please, you have to believe me. I'm - I'm so sorry.
[And it's true, not just empty words said out of panic. He's sorrier for failing her than almost anything else in his entire life.]
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What did you do, big brother? [She repeats, and her face ... there's something wrong with her face, her expression. Her mouth is twisting a little, and her hands go over her stomach in distress.]
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