A Knight in Shining Whatever
Blah. I hate Valentine's Day. With a passion. What makes this year worse, though, is that tommorow is the day people are going to Florida Superstars- aka the competition I was invited to but couldn't afford. So not only am I single and bitter and sort of lonely (hey! at least I can admit it at the moment), but I'm also not where I SHOULD be. I should be there. We should be there. Admittedly, I have tons of confidence issues w/ dancing, but the truth is, I know I'm good enough to compete. Especially with Mark, because for whatever reason, we have fantastic chemistry and dance really well together. I should fucking be there. And I'm not. AND IT REALLY FUCKING SUCKS. I love competition (there's a news flash for you...) and I love dancing and damn it, I want to wear ridiculously sparkley, revealing over-the-top outfits and dance until I can't possibly see straight, let alone stand anymore. Damn it all.
On the other hand, I know I should try and be positive, something which has been become exceedingly difficult for this girl who was formerly glass half-full all the freakin time. I mean, they thought enough of me and my dancing to invite me. That's pretty freakin cool, esp. since the invite was offered a few months ago. And they invited me to another one, out in LA in May. So they have confidence in me, which is nice. I like that. I'm still dancing, even if I"m not doing with it what I want to be doing (competing). I do love it and have fun with it, which does count. A lot. Other positive things: Daddy's taking me to the Phils' Opening Day [APRIL 2 VERSUS ATLANTA!!!!!!!] That should be fun. Like your mom.
I'm trying, see? I can't stand my job @ the moment but am really trying to keep my eyes on the potential it has. But I'm also starting to wonder if I'm just falling into cause what the hell else can I/do I want to do? *shrugs* I know, I'll run away and join the circus! Anybody interesting in joining?
Ok, that wasn't quite as optimistic as I had hoped for, but I tried. That counts. GO PHILLIES!!
On the other hand, I know I should try and be positive, something which has been become exceedingly difficult for this girl who was formerly glass half-full all the freakin time. I mean, they thought enough of me and my dancing to invite me. That's pretty freakin cool, esp. since the invite was offered a few months ago. And they invited me to another one, out in LA in May. So they have confidence in me, which is nice. I like that. I'm still dancing, even if I"m not doing with it what I want to be doing (competing). I do love it and have fun with it, which does count. A lot. Other positive things: Daddy's taking me to the Phils' Opening Day [APRIL 2 VERSUS ATLANTA!!!!!!!] That should be fun. Like your mom.
I'm trying, see? I can't stand my job @ the moment but am really trying to keep my eyes on the potential it has. But I'm also starting to wonder if I'm just falling into cause what the hell else can I/do I want to do? *shrugs* I know, I'll run away and join the circus! Anybody interesting in joining?
Ok, that wasn't quite as optimistic as I had hoped for, but I tried. That counts. GO PHILLIES!!