she's movin' way too fast and all he wanted was to hold her
I leave tomorrow. I'm waking up at the ass-crack of dawn to catch the bus into town, then the bus from town to the airport. These past few days have been... hectic. I should have known. But oh well. I think I managed to get everything done. I have far more stuff than I thought I had. Largely, this is due to things like... I got a comforter while I was here, with pillows; I bought loads and loads of books for my classes, etc. I shipped two boxes home, book-rate, full of books. It cost me 40€, and I still have my backpack full and a couple in my checked luggage. Crazy, no? I hadn't realised I'd bought so many for my thesis, either. But I'll probably be using a bunch of them this summer.
The biggest thing I'm experiencing now is just nostalgia. Nostalgia for the things I thought of doing here and didn't do. Nostalgia for the mistakes I made (or rather, the time prior to those mistakes). Nostalgia for the junior year at Coe that I decided to forgo. I dunno. When I got back from China at the end of my freshman year, a friend of mine said that she was glad I didn't hate America, that I hadn't just left the country and decided something else was so much better than what I had. If I'm honest, I think I like America more now (though we'll have to see if I still do after I've gotten back :P ). There's a Mark Twain quotation that I might have already mentioned here: "loyalty to your country, always; loyalty to your government, when they deserve it." I grew up hating America and hating what it stood for and hating its values. Then I got out of my anger-phase and just didn't care. Now I care a lot, and I can feel myself becoming more political. 'Cause I want America to be good, even though I don't like where I see it's headed.
But back to my original point: I do like how Ireland has changed me, but I wish I could have gotten those changes in a different way.
Final note: Mark (the professor who bought the drinks last night) told me to stop by his office today. He gave me a copy of the book he wrote, saying that pages 210-244 (or something like that) would be "horribly familiar." I realised this semester that Mark was assigned Pliny, not that he chose the person he would teach to us. I don't think Mark likes Pliny at all. :P But yeah. It was just really nice. He was really sincere, and he told me that it was a pleasure teaching me (in response to my saying that his classes were a "ray of sunshine" in my otherwise stressful year abroad) and to keep in touch. I think the "keep in touch" thing might just be standard, but I think he was earnest when he said it was nice teaching me. I think Mark saying that is akin to Burke calling you "kiddo" for the first time.
The biggest thing I'm experiencing now is just nostalgia. Nostalgia for the things I thought of doing here and didn't do. Nostalgia for the mistakes I made (or rather, the time prior to those mistakes). Nostalgia for the junior year at Coe that I decided to forgo. I dunno. When I got back from China at the end of my freshman year, a friend of mine said that she was glad I didn't hate America, that I hadn't just left the country and decided something else was so much better than what I had. If I'm honest, I think I like America more now (though we'll have to see if I still do after I've gotten back :P ). There's a Mark Twain quotation that I might have already mentioned here: "loyalty to your country, always; loyalty to your government, when they deserve it." I grew up hating America and hating what it stood for and hating its values. Then I got out of my anger-phase and just didn't care. Now I care a lot, and I can feel myself becoming more political. 'Cause I want America to be good, even though I don't like where I see it's headed.
But back to my original point: I do like how Ireland has changed me, but I wish I could have gotten those changes in a different way.
Final note: Mark (the professor who bought the drinks last night) told me to stop by his office today. He gave me a copy of the book he wrote, saying that pages 210-244 (or something like that) would be "horribly familiar." I realised this semester that Mark was assigned Pliny, not that he chose the person he would teach to us. I don't think Mark likes Pliny at all. :P But yeah. It was just really nice. He was really sincere, and he told me that it was a pleasure teaching me (in response to my saying that his classes were a "ray of sunshine" in my otherwise stressful year abroad) and to keep in touch. I think the "keep in touch" thing might just be standard, but I think he was earnest when he said it was nice teaching me. I think Mark saying that is akin to Burke calling you "kiddo" for the first time.