just call me mahatma
it's so weird b/c it's 2:30 in the am, i'm using the free u of m wireless internet on my new computer-yeah! and i am bored, but wide awak b/c i took some mydol earlier and it has caffeine in it-just realized-so anyway, i'm bored and so i found maria's what leader are you most like quiz thing-which, maria i really like the quizes you post, entertaining when you've nothing else to do-or your avoiding those things you need to do. but anyway, i am getting off. stream of consciousness writing-like virgina wolff. has anyone see the hours? great, although one of my friends, which happens to be a boy, says its just about a bunch of women bitching about their lives. not so, mister. anyway, the point of this is, i took the test and it said i was most like ghandi. yeah, i don't know how to put the picture on here, but the quote is... "you are an emancipated do gooder. morals matter to you and you like to lead by example. perfection is important to you." SO true.
i was really just thinking about ghandi today. doing a stupid icebreaker in sac, the question was your ideal mate would have the intelligence of..and i said ghandi. i don't know why, but i just LOVE stuff like this that happens in my life. when it seems like someone has everything in control and some small-seemingly unimportant pieces of my life are fitting together. i love it! sorry you got hitler-maria! he was a very intelligent man though! sometimes, i really really question what teh hell i'm doing with myself and am i really doing what i want to be doing. i used to be so strong. where did it all go? i don't know.
now, thinking about virginia wolff again, what i really learned from her is that you honestly only have one life to live and yu must chose carefully how you spend it. there are so many ways to measure success, happiness, fulfillment, and anything else you might desire at one point. of course you must make yourself happy, but even that is tricky. because in making yourself happy you cannot forsake everyone else b/c people are what really make us truely happy. relationships--of all kinds. additionally, you have to worry about food, money, work, and all the otehr b.s. that wasn't created in the beginning. finding the balance is the hardest thing. when we are young, our whole entire lives are spread out in front of us. really, like an empty book, waiting to be written in. or a canvas, waiting to be painted upon. but now, my book has begun, the introduction is complete. not to bad for a beginner, but now, now is the time that the story begins. how many different directions it could turn though. only the author knows the end. my problem is that i want too much. i want to do too much. i want to love too much. i want to cry too much. i want to learn to much. i want to drink too much. i want to stay up late too much. i want to sleep too much. i want to help people too much. mostly i want to love too much. becuase in the end, it will all be a memory. it will be the text for someone else to learn from. for better or worse.
i realize now, being 4 months away from a college degree, that i cannot do it all. i must selectively choose, because, although i know that the next step is better, it is different. and all of this was sparked by ghandi. what an incredible story he left behind. and maria-thanks! now, i am even more wide awake. that's ok. clear thinking time. though i need to go to bed b/c i'm going home tomorrow. goodnight, and God bless us, everyone!
i was really just thinking about ghandi today. doing a stupid icebreaker in sac, the question was your ideal mate would have the intelligence of..and i said ghandi. i don't know why, but i just LOVE stuff like this that happens in my life. when it seems like someone has everything in control and some small-seemingly unimportant pieces of my life are fitting together. i love it! sorry you got hitler-maria! he was a very intelligent man though! sometimes, i really really question what teh hell i'm doing with myself and am i really doing what i want to be doing. i used to be so strong. where did it all go? i don't know.
now, thinking about virginia wolff again, what i really learned from her is that you honestly only have one life to live and yu must chose carefully how you spend it. there are so many ways to measure success, happiness, fulfillment, and anything else you might desire at one point. of course you must make yourself happy, but even that is tricky. because in making yourself happy you cannot forsake everyone else b/c people are what really make us truely happy. relationships--of all kinds. additionally, you have to worry about food, money, work, and all the otehr b.s. that wasn't created in the beginning. finding the balance is the hardest thing. when we are young, our whole entire lives are spread out in front of us. really, like an empty book, waiting to be written in. or a canvas, waiting to be painted upon. but now, my book has begun, the introduction is complete. not to bad for a beginner, but now, now is the time that the story begins. how many different directions it could turn though. only the author knows the end. my problem is that i want too much. i want to do too much. i want to love too much. i want to cry too much. i want to learn to much. i want to drink too much. i want to stay up late too much. i want to sleep too much. i want to help people too much. mostly i want to love too much. becuase in the end, it will all be a memory. it will be the text for someone else to learn from. for better or worse.
i realize now, being 4 months away from a college degree, that i cannot do it all. i must selectively choose, because, although i know that the next step is better, it is different. and all of this was sparked by ghandi. what an incredible story he left behind. and maria-thanks! now, i am even more wide awake. that's ok. clear thinking time. though i need to go to bed b/c i'm going home tomorrow. goodnight, and God bless us, everyone!