wow! so. a lot to say.
First of all, happy holidays, merry christmas, all that jazz. It still doesn't feel like Christmas... which sucks. This semester just took so much out of me, mentally.
I was going to do a whole special holiday post and go "caroling" on people's journals this year, but damned if I am just not too tired. Ugh. I think I will do a christmas recap later.
Instead, Laura, Max, Kyle, Chris, and I got bored and went out to see a movie on Christmas, the first time in my life I have ever done that. I was a little pissed because I wanted to see Sherlock Holmes or Imaginarium and Imaginarium isn't out anywhere locally as far as I can tell and everybody else decided no, Holmes was going to suck, so let's see Avatar.
I was a bit reluctant because of all the Dances With Smurfs crap I've seen about it, not to mention the fact that I hatehatehate most CGI because it comes off looking fake. Maybe not the textures, but the laws of physics never seem to apply. (Not to mention Uncanny Valley shit like Polar Express, GOTDAMN.) But Chris as drunk as fuck and my whole life I've been trying to fight Max and Kyle and Laura when they team up and it just does not fucking work, okay? Ugh. I hate them when they get like that.
Anyway, the non-spoilery summary, it's pretty good. Yes, Dances With Smurfs. Yes, visually stunning. Yes, has lots of lame moments. Dialogue was actually better than I expected. Anyway, I'd say, if you're interested, see it, but it's not some great epic, and it has lots of eye-rolling moments. (At three hours long, I do mean lots.)
Here are my reactions upon seeing the movie:
1) First sight of avatars twitching in the tanks: THOSE MOVEMENTS ARE SO UNNATURAL.
2) avatar cgi: UGH THEY MOVE SO ANNOYINGLY. Honestly, as great as the CGI is, the muscle movement in the avatars is so fucking annoying. Mouths especially, but running and walking was the worst. Not so much for the other animals, IDFK WHY. However, at one point you get more used to seeing the Na'vi than the humans and it's SO MUCH FUCKING CGI it stops bothering you. hHowever, I did like the detail they put into the characters' avatars. Sigourney Weavers' is an "older model" so to speak so she has a more humanoid nose; Jake Sully's has more humanoid eyes than your average Na'vi as well as five fingers per hand WHICH BTW IS JUST FUCKING ODD considering the ~rest~ of the body is Na'vi. (I CAN GIVE YOU A FAKE HIVE-MIND BRAINSTEM BUT DAMNED IF I CAN'T GIVE YOU A FOUR-FINGERED HAND)
3) Na'vi language: REALLY, YOU SPEND $300 MILLION ON A MOVIE AND COULD NOT AFFORD SOMEONE TO SUBTITLE THE NA'VI IN SOMETHING OTHER THAN PAPYRUS? THAT SHIT IS GETTING AS ANNOYING AS COMIC SANS FFS
4) civil engineering moment, excessive waterfall flyovers: oh, hey, critical depth occurs at the edge of a waterfall.
5) nerd moment part dos, in the Hallelujah Mtns: OH HEY LET'S JUST FUCKING ~turn gravity off here~ WE'LL JUST CALL THIS THE BERMUDA TRIANGLE TAKE TWO, AIGHT GUYS?
6) part three: not to mention all these flying rocks in the clouds WHERE THE FUCK ARE ALL THESE WATERFALLS COMING FROM and why hasn't the water just evaporated
7) part six, flying into the tree-space-thing: WHAT THE FUCK THESE ARCHES WOULD NOT APPEAR NATURALLY WHAT KIND OF ROCK FORMATION IS THIS SUPPOSED TO BE. idfk but it really goddamn bothered me.
8) on odd story-telling: Oh, the Na'vi have naturally occurring carbon-fiber bones, huh? idfk, I think you could have written than line less awkwardly. Or, fuck, the whole script. If you pay too much attention, it's kind of a mess of too-detailed-science and generalized-army-science which P.S. WOULD HAVE BEEN A GOOD WAY TO GO FOR A LOT OF IT because the TMI feels fake and the generalized dumbed-down descriptions, one, leave room for the imagination to fill in the plot holes, making it believable, and two, help you identify more with the humans and feel like less of an observer to the plot.
9) on Dances-with-Smurfcats: IT IS. I really thought for a moment he'd just be some warrior-leader and the cultural leader would retain his Kingship so to speak but then YOU TOTALLY INSULTED HIM with the speech ("I'd like your permission...honor me by TRANSLATING BECAUSE I'M TOO GOOD TO SPEAK NA'VI OR ASK YOU TO COMMAND MY MESSAGE INSTEAD.") AND THEN the writers fucking insulted him further by having him Killed Heroically so they don't have to deal with the fact that, oh, hey, this outsider totally fucked up your ascension of tribal leadership, and we'll just conveniently make him the next Cultural Leader instead, AMIRITE GUYS? BECAUSE HE RODE THE DRAGON-BEASTIE?
9b) Not to mention I was pissed when Zoe Saldana's character got to ride that panther-beast thing at the end, THAT HAD TOTALLY COOL POTENTIAL FOR CULTURAL RAMIFICATIONS and instead they just killed it.
10) on the hive-mind: I personally believe this is the only truly ~original~ Cameron had for this. It, and the braids, were awesome. Considering all the drama I've seen considering racism, sexism, and ableism, as an agnostic this hive-mind was truly awesome, a scientific sort of religion, not to mention a semi-hive mind. Not a complete hive mind like Buggers, or complete independence like us, but a SYSTEM OF SYMBIOTIC SPECIES across multitudinous boundaries, all which could communicate with eachother. However, it does bring up some sorts of "ethical" questions considering the seemingly non-advancement of the species over time (idk, that could be my ~human superiority~ [i.e. my human chauvinism/privelege speaking), considering they have probably amassed great knowledge, and wars they have had between "tribes", and lots more.
11) on scriptwriting: UNOBTAINIUM, REALLY, YOU COULDN'T COME UP WITH SOMETHING A LITTLE LESS FOURTH-WALL?
12) On racism: HIT THIS LIKE A BRICK WALL. Even though Laura and Max and Kyle and Chris thought I was crazy for seeing the race-fail in it (I've heard it takes mostly from Aboriginal culture but I don't know enough to speak on that; only that the tree-dance is pretty much stolen directly from the culture that does the Monkey Dance in Baraka or the one in The Fall.), they all thought the aliens were so "stereotypical" of a "weak alien race" that they found it cheesy. Said the only way it could be worse was if they threaded bones through their noses. Hits heavily on the Noble Savage home-front, not to mention the Dances-With-Wolves fail I addressed earlier. Also, way to make this "humanoid" culture be pretty much blue humans with cat noses. They cry, they laugh, they speak another language... so what? THEY KIND OF HAVE DREAD-MOHAWKS. THEY ALL HAVE BLACK HAIR, WHERE IS THE FUCKING GENETIC VARIATION, OMFG. Also, way to make their skin-freckles mimic ritual scarring, THAT MAY HAVE NOT BEEN THE BEST IDEA.
13) on ableism: I, actually, have no ground to speak on this front. It's something I am sadly to ignorant about to make any sort of formed opinion on the matter.
14) on gender stereotypes: Nice male/female identification there. In the religion (a bit too obviously OMGPAGAN for me, but maybe I am overestimating the average audience member's exposure/acceptance of non-Christian tropes in the US), the physical representation of the Na'vi... yeah. I feel like they could have made these "humanoids" sort of gender-neutral, ignored their OMGNAKEDNESS (so much for original sin and the noble savage, AMIRITE GUYS?) and maybe had Mating for Life to do more with their hive-mind-braid-stem (see what I did there)? Or am I once again pushing it too far? idfk. I realize the implications that would have on the hive-mind relationship to both their "Mother" and their animal-steed-familiars, but it is obviously DEEPLY PERSONAL AND SACRED, I'm sure with a little creativity this could have been wonderfully done. On another note, why couldn't Zoe Saldana's character become the Bigass-Dragon-Rider? SECRET PATRIARCHY in a ~omgmatriarchalcheckouthowpaganweare~ culture. yeah.
15) on Cameron's dream-world: First of all, apparently, when we discover an Earth Subsitute, aren't we lucky, it will still have bamboo! Secondly, the plants seemed to start off in a beautiful mimcry of underwater nature... and then promptly went nowhere with it. Flora and fauna failure. CHECK OUT MY HAMMERHEAD RHINO GUYS, OH SHIT, HERE COMES THE PANTHER WITH SIX LEGS. AND NOW THESE HYENAS WITH SIX LEGS. AND CHECK OUT THESE ARMOR-PLATED HORSES WITH SIX LEGS, AMIRITE? Actually, in terms of culture appropriation, the horses seemed incredibly offensive as their defining silhouette seemed ripped from Native American art and ancient cave paintings. The only thing remotely cool, other than the semi-hive-mind I already mentioned, was the dragon things, because they had four wings AND legs AND badass beaks and crests AND wicked coloring AND they moved like bats on cave walls when they were hanging on the undersides of the Mountains Ripped Straight from Gamerworlds.
16) on script-writing, part dos: SLOW GRAVITY, WHAT THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN MEAN. Here is another example of TMI ruining the scene. Don't mess with your planet's gravity, if: ONE, gravity appears to have the same exact effects as Earth's, and TWO, IF YOU HAVE FLOATING MOUNTAINS. Also, don't use words like Flux Forcefield or whateverthefuck it was. JUST. DON'T.
Overall, I feel like Cameron spent $300M executing a not-fully executed idea. Blacklight poster graphics? you got it. Cheap humanoid culture that isn't, actually, very alien, considering all the "wildlife"? Check. Wildlife that isn't very creative after all? MAJOR CHECK. One good idea not executed very well-roundedly? You get Avatar.
I think he spent a bit too much time staring at UV blacklight posters instead of coming up with actually creative ideas. =/ Although, if he does make this a trilogy, he does have the opening to clean up all this crap and do some real good with it.
Also, is it just me, or is it weird they only kept two other humans around at the end? jfc, what about all the background characters that were literally standing in the background involved with Sigourney Weaver's character's research? Just the glasses guy gets to go? OKAY. did he get an avatar AND ALSO later on when he ran out of emergency oxygen a body transfer? yeah, yeah, plot holes, geez. =/
ALTHOUGH I HAVE TO SAY all the bioluminescence was kinda cool and I REALLY WANT A HELI-GECKO, LIKE, YESTERDAY. (I hate stoner UV posters but damned if I don't like neon colors and black lights.)
That all being said, for Hollywood, it was entertaining, the graphics exceeded my expectations of this film but have not yet met my standards for How Physics Works. It did feel like A Movie and not A Video Game, too.
...Whew. I think I hit everything. Okay, despite the fact that I know this is not a perfectly-written essay, it's good enough for 2 am, and I'm sure my ignorances encourage discussion, so, wtf, go for it. Rip me a new one if you so desire. =) And I'm plenty sure I missed something... somewhere. I wrote a lot.
I was going to do a whole special holiday post and go "caroling" on people's journals this year, but damned if I am just not too tired. Ugh. I think I will do a christmas recap later.
Instead, Laura, Max, Kyle, Chris, and I got bored and went out to see a movie on Christmas, the first time in my life I have ever done that. I was a little pissed because I wanted to see Sherlock Holmes or Imaginarium and Imaginarium isn't out anywhere locally as far as I can tell and everybody else decided no, Holmes was going to suck, so let's see Avatar.
I was a bit reluctant because of all the Dances With Smurfs crap I've seen about it, not to mention the fact that I hatehatehate most CGI because it comes off looking fake. Maybe not the textures, but the laws of physics never seem to apply. (Not to mention Uncanny Valley shit like Polar Express, GOTDAMN.) But Chris as drunk as fuck and my whole life I've been trying to fight Max and Kyle and Laura when they team up and it just does not fucking work, okay? Ugh. I hate them when they get like that.
Anyway, the non-spoilery summary, it's pretty good. Yes, Dances With Smurfs. Yes, visually stunning. Yes, has lots of lame moments. Dialogue was actually better than I expected. Anyway, I'd say, if you're interested, see it, but it's not some great epic, and it has lots of eye-rolling moments. (At three hours long, I do mean lots.)
Here are my reactions upon seeing the movie:
1) First sight of avatars twitching in the tanks: THOSE MOVEMENTS ARE SO UNNATURAL.
2) avatar cgi: UGH THEY MOVE SO ANNOYINGLY. Honestly, as great as the CGI is, the muscle movement in the avatars is so fucking annoying. Mouths especially, but running and walking was the worst. Not so much for the other animals, IDFK WHY. However, at one point you get more used to seeing the Na'vi than the humans and it's SO MUCH FUCKING CGI it stops bothering you. hHowever, I did like the detail they put into the characters' avatars. Sigourney Weavers' is an "older model" so to speak so she has a more humanoid nose; Jake Sully's has more humanoid eyes than your average Na'vi as well as five fingers per hand WHICH BTW IS JUST FUCKING ODD considering the ~rest~ of the body is Na'vi. (I CAN GIVE YOU A FAKE HIVE-MIND BRAINSTEM BUT DAMNED IF I CAN'T GIVE YOU A FOUR-FINGERED HAND)
3) Na'vi language: REALLY, YOU SPEND $300 MILLION ON A MOVIE AND COULD NOT AFFORD SOMEONE TO SUBTITLE THE NA'VI IN SOMETHING OTHER THAN PAPYRUS? THAT SHIT IS GETTING AS ANNOYING AS COMIC SANS FFS
4) civil engineering moment, excessive waterfall flyovers: oh, hey, critical depth occurs at the edge of a waterfall.
5) nerd moment part dos, in the Hallelujah Mtns: OH HEY LET'S JUST FUCKING ~turn gravity off here~ WE'LL JUST CALL THIS THE BERMUDA TRIANGLE TAKE TWO, AIGHT GUYS?
6) part three: not to mention all these flying rocks in the clouds WHERE THE FUCK ARE ALL THESE WATERFALLS COMING FROM and why hasn't the water just evaporated
7) part six, flying into the tree-space-thing: WHAT THE FUCK THESE ARCHES WOULD NOT APPEAR NATURALLY WHAT KIND OF ROCK FORMATION IS THIS SUPPOSED TO BE. idfk but it really goddamn bothered me.
8) on odd story-telling: Oh, the Na'vi have naturally occurring carbon-fiber bones, huh? idfk, I think you could have written than line less awkwardly. Or, fuck, the whole script. If you pay too much attention, it's kind of a mess of too-detailed-science and generalized-army-science which P.S. WOULD HAVE BEEN A GOOD WAY TO GO FOR A LOT OF IT because the TMI feels fake and the generalized dumbed-down descriptions, one, leave room for the imagination to fill in the plot holes, making it believable, and two, help you identify more with the humans and feel like less of an observer to the plot.
9) on Dances-with-Smurfcats: IT IS. I really thought for a moment he'd just be some warrior-leader and the cultural leader would retain his Kingship so to speak but then YOU TOTALLY INSULTED HIM with the speech ("I'd like your permission...honor me by TRANSLATING BECAUSE I'M TOO GOOD TO SPEAK NA'VI OR ASK YOU TO COMMAND MY MESSAGE INSTEAD.") AND THEN the writers fucking insulted him further by having him Killed Heroically so they don't have to deal with the fact that, oh, hey, this outsider totally fucked up your ascension of tribal leadership, and we'll just conveniently make him the next Cultural Leader instead, AMIRITE GUYS? BECAUSE HE RODE THE DRAGON-BEASTIE?
9b) Not to mention I was pissed when Zoe Saldana's character got to ride that panther-beast thing at the end, THAT HAD TOTALLY COOL POTENTIAL FOR CULTURAL RAMIFICATIONS and instead they just killed it.
10) on the hive-mind: I personally believe this is the only truly ~original~ Cameron had for this. It, and the braids, were awesome. Considering all the drama I've seen considering racism, sexism, and ableism, as an agnostic this hive-mind was truly awesome, a scientific sort of religion, not to mention a semi-hive mind. Not a complete hive mind like Buggers, or complete independence like us, but a SYSTEM OF SYMBIOTIC SPECIES across multitudinous boundaries, all which could communicate with eachother. However, it does bring up some sorts of "ethical" questions considering the seemingly non-advancement of the species over time (idk, that could be my ~human superiority~ [i.e. my human chauvinism/privelege speaking), considering they have probably amassed great knowledge, and wars they have had between "tribes", and lots more.
11) on scriptwriting: UNOBTAINIUM, REALLY, YOU COULDN'T COME UP WITH SOMETHING A LITTLE LESS FOURTH-WALL?
12) On racism: HIT THIS LIKE A BRICK WALL. Even though Laura and Max and Kyle and Chris thought I was crazy for seeing the race-fail in it (I've heard it takes mostly from Aboriginal culture but I don't know enough to speak on that; only that the tree-dance is pretty much stolen directly from the culture that does the Monkey Dance in Baraka or the one in The Fall.), they all thought the aliens were so "stereotypical" of a "weak alien race" that they found it cheesy. Said the only way it could be worse was if they threaded bones through their noses. Hits heavily on the Noble Savage home-front, not to mention the Dances-With-Wolves fail I addressed earlier. Also, way to make this "humanoid" culture be pretty much blue humans with cat noses. They cry, they laugh, they speak another language... so what? THEY KIND OF HAVE DREAD-MOHAWKS. THEY ALL HAVE BLACK HAIR, WHERE IS THE FUCKING GENETIC VARIATION, OMFG. Also, way to make their skin-freckles mimic ritual scarring, THAT MAY HAVE NOT BEEN THE BEST IDEA.
13) on ableism: I, actually, have no ground to speak on this front. It's something I am sadly to ignorant about to make any sort of formed opinion on the matter.
14) on gender stereotypes: Nice male/female identification there. In the religion (a bit too obviously OMGPAGAN for me, but maybe I am overestimating the average audience member's exposure/acceptance of non-Christian tropes in the US), the physical representation of the Na'vi... yeah. I feel like they could have made these "humanoids" sort of gender-neutral, ignored their OMGNAKEDNESS (so much for original sin and the noble savage, AMIRITE GUYS?) and maybe had Mating for Life to do more with their hive-mind-braid-stem (see what I did there)? Or am I once again pushing it too far? idfk. I realize the implications that would have on the hive-mind relationship to both their "Mother" and their animal-steed-familiars, but it is obviously DEEPLY PERSONAL AND SACRED, I'm sure with a little creativity this could have been wonderfully done. On another note, why couldn't Zoe Saldana's character become the Bigass-Dragon-Rider? SECRET PATRIARCHY in a ~omgmatriarchalcheckouthowpaganweare~ culture. yeah.
15) on Cameron's dream-world: First of all, apparently, when we discover an Earth Subsitute, aren't we lucky, it will still have bamboo! Secondly, the plants seemed to start off in a beautiful mimcry of underwater nature... and then promptly went nowhere with it. Flora and fauna failure. CHECK OUT MY HAMMERHEAD RHINO GUYS, OH SHIT, HERE COMES THE PANTHER WITH SIX LEGS. AND NOW THESE HYENAS WITH SIX LEGS. AND CHECK OUT THESE ARMOR-PLATED HORSES WITH SIX LEGS, AMIRITE? Actually, in terms of culture appropriation, the horses seemed incredibly offensive as their defining silhouette seemed ripped from Native American art and ancient cave paintings. The only thing remotely cool, other than the semi-hive-mind I already mentioned, was the dragon things, because they had four wings AND legs AND badass beaks and crests AND wicked coloring AND they moved like bats on cave walls when they were hanging on the undersides of the Mountains Ripped Straight from Gamerworlds.
16) on script-writing, part dos: SLOW GRAVITY, WHAT THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN MEAN. Here is another example of TMI ruining the scene. Don't mess with your planet's gravity, if: ONE, gravity appears to have the same exact effects as Earth's, and TWO, IF YOU HAVE FLOATING MOUNTAINS. Also, don't use words like Flux Forcefield or whateverthefuck it was. JUST. DON'T.
Overall, I feel like Cameron spent $300M executing a not-fully executed idea. Blacklight poster graphics? you got it. Cheap humanoid culture that isn't, actually, very alien, considering all the "wildlife"? Check. Wildlife that isn't very creative after all? MAJOR CHECK. One good idea not executed very well-roundedly? You get Avatar.
I think he spent a bit too much time staring at UV blacklight posters instead of coming up with actually creative ideas. =/ Although, if he does make this a trilogy, he does have the opening to clean up all this crap and do some real good with it.
Also, is it just me, or is it weird they only kept two other humans around at the end? jfc, what about all the background characters that were literally standing in the background involved with Sigourney Weaver's character's research? Just the glasses guy gets to go? OKAY. did he get an avatar AND ALSO later on when he ran out of emergency oxygen a body transfer? yeah, yeah, plot holes, geez. =/
ALTHOUGH I HAVE TO SAY all the bioluminescence was kinda cool and I REALLY WANT A HELI-GECKO, LIKE, YESTERDAY. (I hate stoner UV posters but damned if I don't like neon colors and black lights.)
That all being said, for Hollywood, it was entertaining, the graphics exceeded my expectations of this film but have not yet met my standards for How Physics Works. It did feel like A Movie and not A Video Game, too.
...Whew. I think I hit everything. Okay, despite the fact that I know this is not a perfectly-written essay, it's good enough for 2 am, and I'm sure my ignorances encourage discussion, so, wtf, go for it. Rip me a new one if you so desire. =) And I'm plenty sure I missed something... somewhere. I wrote a lot.