you're still my day late friend...

[mer_j]

I was at a funeral yesterday, I was looking around at all the people, and they were practically all old. Imagine being old and just having person after person you love die. It's a terrible thought really. But I guess it's true. While I was there, I was thinking about Grandpa. And it really hit me. He's actually gone. I'll never see him again. I really want to go to Cheticamp this summer for his final funeral. But then there's Red Pine. I can't work on Staff and go there. It's actually such a hard choice. I think the experience of being on Staff at Red Pine would be amazing, but at the same time I love Cheticamp, and especially to be there for Grandpa's service. I don't know. I could see if I end up passing my bronze med. But I probably will now. The only reason I didn't pass it last time was for the timed swim, but I actually did it today. So I guess I'll probably pass it. It would make it easier if I didn't pass it, because then I couldn't work on Staff and I could go to Cheticamp. AH! I really don't know what to do. Maybe I'll apply for Red Pine and see if I get on... and if I don't then I'll go to Cheticamp, but if I do get on, then I still don't know what to do. Sigh. I'm excited for exams. Only because we get a week off school. I'm tired of school.

"I'm tired of pretending I don't care because the truth is - I care more than you'll ever know."

-Meredith