(no subject)
I don't know how many times I've sat down to write something, only to realize I don't know what to write. So, uh, here's what's going on with me.
Something has been wrong with me lately, and I still have no clue what it is. I really wish I could just figure it out and get over it but that's kinda hard to do when I still don't know the cause. And the people I seem to be taking it out on are the ones who deserve it the least.
Summer has been so-so. I've hung out with a few people, but I've mostly just been babysitting. There are really only two things I have to look forward to, and one of them seems to be stressing out my family and me lately. I feel like I should be hanging out with a lot of people that I haven't seen in a long while, but when it comes down to it, I just don't have the motivation to actually do it. Not that I don't want to, but everybody has different lives now. It's just harder to get back to the point you once were at.
I also don't know why I've been so contemplative lately. Part of growing up, maybe? I ask a lot of questions (to Dan mostly), but can't seem to give a response when asked back. I expect a lot of people, but don't register at first that they might expect a lot of me. I have secrets that I can't tell anyone, nothing major... just about stuff that has been on my mind lately. Frankly, I think I might just be embarrassed or scared to talk about it all. I'm losing my patience with people. I feel like I'm caught between an adult world and a kid world. This could be brought on by the fact that I spend everyday with kids, and I have to be the adult, and then when I come home, I'm the "only child", the baby, and everything flips. It's so weird and difficult to cope with at times.
Basically, all I do is ramble on because I don't know what's going on in my head anymore. The only things that are clear to me are that I love my family, I love someone, and I really want to go back to Miami (haha, what else is new).
In other news, sleeping in is the best; I enjoy going to the shooting range with my daddio; I am currently hating my hair; I have been in the mood to take a roadtrip somewhere; my room is blue; I don't like it when my car is dirty.
ALSO: if anyone would like to see OAR and Jack's Mannequin with me when they come to Columbus, let me know :)
Something has been wrong with me lately, and I still have no clue what it is. I really wish I could just figure it out and get over it but that's kinda hard to do when I still don't know the cause. And the people I seem to be taking it out on are the ones who deserve it the least.
Summer has been so-so. I've hung out with a few people, but I've mostly just been babysitting. There are really only two things I have to look forward to, and one of them seems to be stressing out my family and me lately. I feel like I should be hanging out with a lot of people that I haven't seen in a long while, but when it comes down to it, I just don't have the motivation to actually do it. Not that I don't want to, but everybody has different lives now. It's just harder to get back to the point you once were at.
I also don't know why I've been so contemplative lately. Part of growing up, maybe? I ask a lot of questions (to Dan mostly), but can't seem to give a response when asked back. I expect a lot of people, but don't register at first that they might expect a lot of me. I have secrets that I can't tell anyone, nothing major... just about stuff that has been on my mind lately. Frankly, I think I might just be embarrassed or scared to talk about it all. I'm losing my patience with people. I feel like I'm caught between an adult world and a kid world. This could be brought on by the fact that I spend everyday with kids, and I have to be the adult, and then when I come home, I'm the "only child", the baby, and everything flips. It's so weird and difficult to cope with at times.
Basically, all I do is ramble on because I don't know what's going on in my head anymore. The only things that are clear to me are that I love my family, I love someone, and I really want to go back to Miami (haha, what else is new).
In other news, sleeping in is the best; I enjoy going to the shooting range with my daddio; I am currently hating my hair; I have been in the mood to take a roadtrip somewhere; my room is blue; I don't like it when my car is dirty.
ALSO: if anyone would like to see OAR and Jack's Mannequin with me when they come to Columbus, let me know :)