The Pinnacle of Artistic Creation.
I declare that Power Rangers (the hardcore original series, not the gay later ones) is the pinnacle of human evolution. The entire human culture of music and drama and writing led solely to that show. Now it's aired, everything else is the 'Happily Ever After' for the world. But you tossers won't shut up and enjoy it.
Of course, I haven't seen the show since I was eight years old and miming karate with my trousers on back to front. I'm afraid it won't live up to my wholly reasonable expectations. But that's just my paranoia talking.
But seriously, that show kicked unholy amounts of ass. It would always follow the same pattern, too.
Phase One: Rangers Would Faff About At School. Those Two Dudes In Leather Jackets Would Make Snarky Comments. General Dicking About. Forgettable Teen High School Plot. Characterisation Etc. Would Happen Here. Basically Padding.
Phase Two: Putty Dudes Would Show Up. Rangers Would Hand Them Their Grey Asses.
Phase Three: More Putty Dudes Show Up. Rangers Morph, Then Hand Them Their Collective Ass. Unsure Why They Needed To Morph, Really.
Phase Four: Zordon (I Think That Was His Name) Would Summon The Rangers, And Tell Them About The Man In A Rubber Suit That They Had To Beat Up This Week. Alpha Would Declare Incessantly How Much He Desires The Cock, To The Amusement Of All.
Phase Five: Rangers Would Meet Man In Rubber Suit. Would Dodge Sparks For A Bit, Then Whip Out Weapons And Blow Up Scenery Immediately Behind Bad Guy. This Hurts Bad Guy For Some Reason.
Phase Six: Make My Monster Grow, Bitch.
Phase Seven: Oh Shit. Monster Has Now Been Transplanted To Another Location, And Is Seriously Menacing A Scale Model Of A City.
Phase Eight: Rangers Summon Dinobots. Dinobots Fuse Into Giant Man, Because Everyone Knows A Robot Man Is Better Than A Robot T-Rex. Even If The T-Rex Is Hilariously Innacurate.
Phase Nine: The Man And The Suit Monster Fight. Much Of The Scale Model Is Destroyed. Rangers Are Seen To Wobble. Sparks Inevitably Fly.
Phase Ten: Rangers Kick Ass. Rita and Zedd Nonplussed.
I think my point speaks for itself.
Of course, I haven't seen the show since I was eight years old and miming karate with my trousers on back to front. I'm afraid it won't live up to my wholly reasonable expectations. But that's just my paranoia talking.
But seriously, that show kicked unholy amounts of ass. It would always follow the same pattern, too.
Phase One: Rangers Would Faff About At School. Those Two Dudes In Leather Jackets Would Make Snarky Comments. General Dicking About. Forgettable Teen High School Plot. Characterisation Etc. Would Happen Here. Basically Padding.
Phase Two: Putty Dudes Would Show Up. Rangers Would Hand Them Their Grey Asses.
Phase Three: More Putty Dudes Show Up. Rangers Morph, Then Hand Them Their Collective Ass. Unsure Why They Needed To Morph, Really.
Phase Four: Zordon (I Think That Was His Name) Would Summon The Rangers, And Tell Them About The Man In A Rubber Suit That They Had To Beat Up This Week. Alpha Would Declare Incessantly How Much He Desires The Cock, To The Amusement Of All.
Phase Five: Rangers Would Meet Man In Rubber Suit. Would Dodge Sparks For A Bit, Then Whip Out Weapons And Blow Up Scenery Immediately Behind Bad Guy. This Hurts Bad Guy For Some Reason.
Phase Six: Make My Monster Grow, Bitch.
Phase Seven: Oh Shit. Monster Has Now Been Transplanted To Another Location, And Is Seriously Menacing A Scale Model Of A City.
Phase Eight: Rangers Summon Dinobots. Dinobots Fuse Into Giant Man, Because Everyone Knows A Robot Man Is Better Than A Robot T-Rex. Even If The T-Rex Is Hilariously Innacurate.
Phase Nine: The Man And The Suit Monster Fight. Much Of The Scale Model Is Destroyed. Rangers Are Seen To Wobble. Sparks Inevitably Fly.
Phase Ten: Rangers Kick Ass. Rita and Zedd Nonplussed.
I think my point speaks for itself.