FIC: Mad World, Part 1
Mad World
On the day before everything in Jared's Padalecki's life unwound itself he couldn't really feel the change in the air. Though you can look at it now, and see where all the pieces knit together.
**
History class is intolerably dull as usual, so Jared's amusing himself by gazing out of the window at the scene of pastoral spring playing itself out in front of him. The way the trees and the blades of grass start to shiver and sigh with the wind, the colors catching in the sun and the dance of the seedlings across the field as they find place to rest themselves and germinate. It's like that French painting come to life, only without the naked people, Jared muses to himself.
And somewhere in the mists of his reverie, Professor Samantha Smith-bane of his academic existence, slams her textbook down on Jared's desk and he reacts with an embarrassing yelp. The entire class erupts with laughter and Professor Smith sucks in her teeth. "Mr. Padalecki, if only you'd spend half as much of your time on your studies as you do on daydreaming. Why, you'd overtake the head of the class by quite the margin."
Jared smiles, "I sacrifice myself, Ma'am, for the sake of the grading curve. You're all welcome," Jared says to the class, and they laugh softly in return.
Jared nods and Professor Smith goes back to her lecturing, though soon his thoughts and eyes are wandering back out the window, to the springtime and the breeze.
Class dismisses, and Jared starts to pack his books with the others. Chad bumps his arm, "We're playing a game today, and you're in, right?"
Jared chews the inside of his lip. "I dunno if I can, I have to meet with Dean-Dean Morgan again," Jared always refers to the Dean by both his last names, even to the Dean's face, which might explain the fact that he's still on academic probation; even though his grades have gone up since-
Jared shakes off that thought and slings his bag over his shoulder as he walks out of the classroom with Chad.
Chad groans, "Oh come on! Are you still on probation?" Jared nods and Chad shakes his head. "Only you could get in trouble for constantly having your head in the clouds, Jared. Couldn't you have done something worth getting into trouble for? Like stolen a mascot? Or painted a mural in the cafeteria like that freshman did?"
Jared shrugs, "I'm a mystery like that. Many layers, like an onion."
The other guys are splayed out on the benches by the sports green when Chad and Jared join them to wait for the Girls' croquet club to finish practicing and clear the field for their soccer game.
Tom acknowledges them with a nod, and then returns to his book; Mike's idly shuffling a deck of playing cards, and peers over Tom's shoulder before he scoffs.
"Nursery rhymes?!" Mike exclaims.
Tom rolls his eyes. "It's for my thesis," he says dryly.
"Only you could study literary theory and then apply it to 'How doth the busy bee'," Jared says with a smirk.
Chad sputters, "How doth the what?"
Jared stands, appreciating his audience, and recites from childhood memory, complete with the corresponding hand motions.
"How doth the little busy bee
Improve each shining hour,
And gather honey all the day
From ev'ry opening flower!"
"I thought it was about a crocodile?" Misha interrupts from his corner on the bench.
"Not the way I'd heard it," Jared says, and then before he can continue, a whistle blows and the girls start to wander off the field.
Chad smiles at one of them, a little thing with the mouse-brown hair, "Hey, Sophia!" he calls to her.
She sniffs the air, ignoring him, opting to flick a cigarette out of the pack instead. "Did you ladies hear something?" and her girlfriends all roll their eyes and laugh.
"They really shouldn't smoke so much," Misha says towards the girls as they head towards the dorms.
Chad shouts after her, "You know you can't resist me!"
"There are other girls out there," Mike says.
Jared snorts. "And Chad's already been with them all, that's the problem."
The guys laugh and start to assemble on the field for their game. "C'mon Jared, just play with us for a little bit?"
Jared sighs. "Maybe…"
"Or you could go to the Dean's office, not be late for your meeting, get off probation, and then come back and play a full game and be able to rejoin the soccer team like you've been planning to all along," Mike says matter-of-factly.
Jared sighs heavily. "Must you? Always with your logic and reason." Mike shrugs and Jared kicks a little patch of grass simply for being there, and a dandelion or two for getting too close. He takes a deep breath. "Wish me luck?"
"Those of us that are about to play soccer, salute you," Tom says, giving him a fist pump in the air and everybody laughs, as the ball hits the ground and all of a sudden they're immersed in the game. They don't see Jared taking the long, dreaded walk across the field to the Dean's office.
**
Of course, it also had to be the day Jensen Ackles was at the desk outside of Dean-Dean Morgan's office. Jared pretends not to notice the particular twitch Jensen makes when he sees Jared standing in the doorway.
Jensen isn't just a grad student working for the Dean's office, he's also the head of the peer tutoring program, and personally selected by the Dean to tutor Jared every other weekday and on Saturdays.
And the worst, the absolute worst part of that whole equation, is that Jensen Ackles is also fucking gorgeous. The punctual, persnickety and obnoxious owner of a mouth that just begs to be kissed. At least in Jared's head he's begged.
Jensen's just as tall as Jared, coming to where their mouths could so easily lock together-a thought that crosses Jared's mind more often than he'd care to admit. He hides his lovely eyes behind thin, wire frames and an equally lovely body behind rumpled brown clothes. Which Jared takes in frustration as a sign that Jensen actually actively tries to make himself less appealing to look at.
Jared saunters over to the desk where Jensen is assisting with Dean-Dean Morgan's filing, making neat little piles of everything. Jared wonders what Jensen would do if he hopped up on the desk and scattered the papers all around, kicked the folders to the ground and ruined all of Jensen's hard work.
In his mind's eye, Jared envisions himself doing just that, all with a satisfied little grin on his face, like a cat into cream. And then he sees Jensen turn red, flushing with anger and frustration and ripping the glasses from his face, eyes burning with intensity.
With passion.
Jared thinks of himself shrinking away slightly as Jensen charges forward, hopping up on the desk to join him, pinning Jared flat on his back with a powerful kiss. Jared shivering as Jensen's hands are grabbing at the fabric of their clothing; and then they're pawing at each other madly, like animals.
"Damn it, Jared!" Jensen screams between kisses and moans, "Jared..."
"Jared!" Jensen yells loud enough to break him from his daydream. Jared's been leaning against the doorjamb the entire time, staring at him. He can tell because Jensen gets fidgety whenever Jared fantasizes about him during the tutoring sessions. And Jensen's most definitely shifting uncomfortably in his chair.
"Huh?" Jared says, trying to shake off his reverie.
"I said you can take a seat, the Dean's finishing up with another student," Jensen hisses, and then flicks open his gold pocket-watch to check the time. "Besides that, you're late anyhow. And stop staring at me! Don't you have a book or something you could be reading? Like maybe one you have an essay test for on Monday?"
Jared rolls his eyes and flops down on one of the chairs, ignoring Jensen's nagging. "Doesn't ring a bell."
"Of course it doesn't," Jensen mutters, going back to his filing.
Jared huffs and blows a lock of his hair out of his eyes. He's really got to trim it, or try that goop Chad's always slicking his hair back with.
A few minutes pass and the door to Dean-Dean Morgan's door clicks open. He walks out with a young blond girl, wringing her hands. "Now Miss Cassidy, no more organizing murals on school property. Let's keep the art in the art rooms." She nods, and hurries off.
Dean-Dean Morgan smiles, and turns to Jared, "Mr. Padalecki, if you please?" he beckons, directing Jared to enter his office. Jared gives Jensen a final wink and a click of his tongue before he ducks inside, trying to get under his skin a little more, and make him do the thing where he pretends to clean his glasses so he doesn't watch Jared from afar.
At least, that's what Jared imagines he does.
Jared sits in front of Dean-Dean Morgan's desk, and begins snatching assorted candies from the dish he keeps there.
"So you know why I've called you here, Mr. Padalecki?" the timid Dean asks, trying at the same time to sit up straighter in his chair, attempting to get a little height advantage, even though Jared still towers over him.
"To discuss my-" Jared gnaws on a butterscotch and it cracks in his mouth, "-academic probation?"
Dean-Dean Morgan nods, shuffling his papers. "I'm afraid that while your grades have improved since you joined our peer education program..."
Jared snorts. "You mean when you told me to pick suspension or torturing?"
"Tutoring," the Dean corrects. "And as I was saying, your grades have improved, which is good!"
"So I'm off probation?" Jared asks, hopefully.
"Sadly, no. I'm afraid your continued classroom behavior is still being called into question by one of your instructors," Dean Morgan says.
Jared groans and throws his head back. "Not Professor Smith! She hates me Dean-Dean Morgan, that shouldn't count!"
Dean Morgan clasps his hands together, ignoring the nickname Jared's saddled him with. "But unfortunately, it does. I cannot lift your probation at this time, Jared. And we'd like you to continue attending your tutoring sessions."
"But, that's just not fair! Why am I being punished for acting out in class with having to still be tutored!"
"That's just how the program works, Jared. Until your teachers can give you a passing report-"
Jared resists kicking a hole through Dean-Dean Morgan's desk, and sits back, listening to him ramble on and on about the virtues of continuing in the program, and the further progress he can make. When he's finished, Jared mumbles a half-polite goodbye under his breath, and excuses himself.
Jared almost slams the door on the way out of the Dean's office. He takes a deep breath and glares at Jensen.
Jensen raises an eyebrow at him. "Please don't slam the door."
Jared almost snarls in response. "That spineless little jerkoff just letting Professor Smith walk all over him like that! Wish he'd grow a backbone and she'd grow a heart..." Jared mutters to himself as he stomps towards the exit.
"Jared," Jensen says, interrupting his train of thought. "I'll be over for your lessons on Saturday then?"
Jared wants to bang his head against the wall, but even he can't bring himself to that level of melodrama yet. "Yeah, same as always."
"See you then," Jensen says, returning to his files.
Jared looks over his shoulder at him. I wish you'd surprise me just once, and be the person I can see you holding back. Be someone who feels the same way I do. Jared thinks to himself, before turning around and leaving the room.
**
On the day that Jared's life comes tumbling upside down and then right-side up again, he decides over his breakfast grapefruit that he has developed somewhat megalomaniacal tendencies. In so much as he'd like to grasp the world and squeeze the juices out of it, and pour sugar on its bitter parts.
Jared leaves his house on Saturday morning, his puppy, Sadie, yapping at his side. "You know what I'd do with a world of my own, girl?"
Sadie barks, and Jared takes it as her puppy-way of telling him to go on.
"In a world of my own, nothing would be sensible, because sensible is boring. And everything would have sugar on it," Jared begins, but pauses, chewing on his thumbnail. "No, that's not right, in my world..." Jared looks down at Sadie.
"That's it!" Jared snaps his fingers. "In my world, animals would talk like the people. And you wouldn't have to teach your children to recite silly rhymes about bumblebees. The flowers would always grow no matter what the season. And you could weave crowns of daisies, and play sports and have wild parties whenever you wanted. So I'd want a world of contradictions, a world of things I've never seen before, and nothing I'm tired of having to deal with."
Jared nearly slips off the log he's balancing on, he and Sadie crossing the stream to the particular clearing he and Jensen choose to meet. It took him so much cajoling, faking allergies to dust mites, and flat-out begging to get Jensen to leave that musty old library.
"And in my world, a certain someone would get a clue already," Jared sighs.
"He would be fun, and spontaneous, and not afraid to share his feelings. A certain someone that's obsessed with school and boring things would be obsessed with just the opposite. Instead of hounding me about my studies, he'd just-" Jared makes a sly little smirk. "He'd just hound me."
Jared flops back against the trunk of the old oak tree, idly scratching the top of Sadie's forehead. He let's his eyes slip shut for a moment while he catches his breath. "Can you believe I rushed all the way over, and he's not even here yet, huh?"
Sadie licks Jared's fingers in response.
"It's not like Jensen to be late-at least, not later than me, right girl? He's always early to everything, you know," Jared says, thinking aloud.
Jared taps his fingers, then weaves them together in his lap, twiddles them. Fidgets and readjusts himself, pulls at his shirt sleeves from under his jacket.
"He's probably fine," Jared says with a nod. "Not that I'm particularly eager to start my lessons today, I mean, it's the weekend! Who wants to do schoolwork on a Saturday?" Jared looks down at Sadie for confirmation, but she's busy chewing on a stick she found near the tree.
"And I'm talking to my dog. Wonderful." Jared stands up, dusting the grass and dirt from his pants.
"You know what? It's a beautiful day outside. If Jensen doesn't show up soon, I'm going to just take the day off! Go see what Chad and the guys are up to. Probably chasing tail, but then we'll end up at the bar and that'll be just fine. Way more fun than stupid Jensen and his boring lessons; just sitting here listening to him drone on and on while I count the thirty-six or thirty-seven freckles on his face. Not that I-" Jared looks back down at Sadie, who having grown bored with the stick, is fixing him with confused puppy eyes.
"Yeah, I'm that obvious, huh girl?"
Sadie turns her head in an imitation of a doggie shrug.
Jared leans back on his heels, shoves his hands into his pockets. "He'll show up like always holding that old pocket watch of his and saying-"
"I'm late! I'm late!" an unfamiliar voice calls out from behind him. Jared whips his head around and his jaw drops.
It's a white rabbit, but it stands on its hind legs, carrying itself like a man-and even dressing the part! He wears a waistcoat and glasses, carrying what Jared could swear is the same type of pocket-watch that Jensen has. But then again, maybe he's just got Jensen on his mind right now. Before Jared can examine that particular thought too carefully, it starts singing again:
"I'm late! I'm late! For a very important date! No time to say hello; goodbye! I'm late! I'm late! I'm late!" and with a wave of its gloved paw, it disappears over the side of the meadow, through a bit of brush.
Jared and Sadie look at each other for a moment in disbelief, and then they both take off in the direction of the creature. Sadie's barking as she runs alongside Jared, who mutters to himself, "That can't be real, can it? I must be hallucinating the whole thing..."
The rabbit stops in front of a patch of grass, pulling it up like a flap of carpet to reveal a rather large hole in the ground. "Hey! Hey, uhhh, rabbit? Wait a minute!" Jared shouts but the rabbit snaps the gold watch closed and dives down the hole.
Sadie comes to a slippery stop near the mouth of it; paw pads digging into the soft brown earth, whimpering as she hangs over the edge.
"Sadie!" Jared shouts and grabs her quickly, pulling her up to safety and setting her down away from the hole. "Sadie, careful now, you don’t know what's in there and it could be dangerous-" Jared pauses, crouching down to stick his head inside and to get a better look at it.
It's almost like some kind if crawlspace, and no so much a hole at all. The ground almost curving around Jared and the walls of earth changing direction from downward to sideways, like someone's hollowed-out the side of a hill.
"Huh, you know I think this is bigger than it appears to be, Sadie. I could probably just crawl inside, like this."
Jared gets on his hands and knees, rather easily slipping into the hole, and moving through the surprisingly less narrow passageway within.
The tunnel comes to an abrupt halt at the edge of a deep, dark abyss. Jared however, can't see that since it's too dark to see that far ahead, and he goes tumbling over the edge. The last thing he sees is the sunlight coming in from the opening of the hole and Sadie looking down at him, waving her little paw goodbye.
"Whooaaa!" Jared shouts as he falls faster and faster, but then there's a whoosh of air and he's floating down like a feather caught in the wind, swaying from side to side.
"What the?" he says aloud, reaching over to switch on a lamp that seems to have joined him on his journey to the bottom.
In the soft glow of the lamp, he takes in even more peculiar surroundings, all kinds of lights and chairs and tables and sofas are strung up in the crevice, some falling down, others falling up. Jared flops down in the rocking chair that he passes by.
"Okay, so this is new, falling into chamber of discarded living-room accessories. Huh, but I wonder what slowed my fall?" Jared stretches back and raises his arms up over his head, and feels a ribbon tied in his hair. "Strange," he says and gasps as he looks down to spy a pair of black, high-heeled Maryjanes on his feet.
Jared tumbles from the chair, into another fast plummet, and then there's a whoosh of air as the billow of his skirt catches in the updraft like an open umbrella. "Oh, well then that makes sense, my dress got caught in the wind..."
Jared shakes his head. "Wait a minute, my dress?" He glances to the side as a mirror passes upwards, getting the head-to-toe look version of what he's wearing; a powder-blue dress with puffed up sleeves, and a frilly white jumper over it. His legs are covered in opaque white stockings that offset the black heels and he has a white ribbon tied into his hair like a band.
Oddly enough, (as if being caught in a rabbit-hole dressed like a seven year old girl wasn't odd enough), the only thought that immediately springs to Jared's mind is: Now wherever did they find clothes like this in my size? Which should tell him perhaps, that all is not right with the world he's found himself in, nor his state of mind; seeing that he's more curious with the how of these sort of happenings, than the why.
Then again, there's really not that much time left for him to contemplate such mysteries, because he's found himself stopped on the ceiling of another little chamber, this one lined with mirrors, clocks, and doorways.
"Huh?" Jared puzzles. Only seconds later, a flash of white breaks his dumbfounded gaze, and the rabbit going whizzing by again.
"Oh! Wait! Mr. Rabbit wait! Please!" he shouts and climbs down to the floor, the bell of his newly acquired dress going up over his head, and he has to stop and adjust himself into something more presentable. Because really, even though he's not actually a girl, it's not an excuse for him to look unladylike (his mother would have thrown such a fit to see her son flashing his underclothes like that.)
So he follows the rabbit again through another small, strange door that at first glance seems far too small for him to fit into, but turns out to be just his size.
"This is like a fairytale," Jared remarks to himself. And the rabbit opens another door and slamming it shut behind him. Only this one is definitely too small for him to fit, but Jared tries anyway.
Jared grabs the knob and it shouts back at him, "Ow! Not so hard there, missy!"
Jared pulls his hand away fast. "Sorry! So sorry about that!" he says. "Um, I'm not really a girl you know."
"Could've fooled me," the doorknob says. "Well then, what can I do for you?"
"Well, you see I was following the rabbit, and I'm certain he went this way."
"That he did."
"And so I should like to follow him still, may I?"
The doorknob laughs, "Oh but your much too large to fit through me at the moment! You'll have to get a bit smaller first."
Jared pouts and leans his arm on the table beside the tiny door. "Well how am I supposed to do that?" he wonders aloud, eyes scanning the room. Jared shoves his hands in the pockets of his jumper.
"Try the bottle," the doorknob says, and Jared pulls a small green vial from one of his pockets. A slip of paper tied to the neck reads, "Drink Me".
"Well, if that isn't unsettling," Jared clicks his tongue and paces a few steps, contemplating the bottle. "On the one hand, one should never drink or eat anything without knowing what it is, that's good advice, isn't it? But on the other hand, one mustn't be afraid of trying new things. For example, I'd have never thought I could pull off an outfit like this." Jared says, looking over his shoulder and kicking up a heel to show how nice and long his legs look in the ensemble.
The doorknob laughs quietly at Jared's preening.
"But then again, nothing here is as it seems, is it? And well, if I had the bottle all along, I must have known I would need to drink it, yeah? So perhaps the note is one I wrote myself, but forgot that I did."
"Whatever helps you sleep at night," the doorknob smirks.
Jared uncaps the bottle and sniffs the contents, taking a cautious sip, "Huh, it's like nothing I've ever tasted before, somewhere between cherry tarts-"
Jared loses about a foot of height in an instant.
"-pecan dandies-" Another foot and a half goes.
"-and coffee ice-cream!" Jared exclaims, turning back to face the doorknob smiling at him. It's then that he realizes that they're at eye level now.
"I'm-I've been shrunk!" Jared says, eyes wide, the bottle sitting on the ground, taller than he is. The doorknob laughs and Jared tugs at it once again.
"Ow!" the doorknob exclaims, "Oh, I must have forgotten to tell you, I'm locked!"
Jared glares, "Seriously? I shrunk myself down for nothing! Oh no, I can't be this tiny forever, Sadie will try to eat me!"
The doorknob chuckles and Jared starts to squeeze his stupid brass face, this time with both hands. "How the hell do I get you to open?! Tell me how the rabbit did it!"
"Ooooh!" The doorknob whines and then angles its eyes to the end table that's towering over them. "The key! Use the key!"
Jared sees the key through the glass bottom of the table and his eyes brighten. "Now, how can I get up there?" he wonders, trying to climb up the table legs in his heels, without much success.
A chest appears before his feet, the doorknob clears its throat and says, "Try the cookies, the ones that say 'Eat Me'."
"The cookies that say what me?" Jared asks, having already stuffed several of them into his mouth. Then like the shrinking, he suddenly feels his now-gargantuan head connect with the ceiling. "Owwww," he moans and the doorknob continues mocking him with the most irritating, tittering laughter.
It's got to be a combination of all the shrinking and growing, maybe coupled with the fact that he's dressed like a little girl and Jensen's got to be looking for him by now, thinking he's skipped out on the lesson to spite him. But Jared finds himself sniffling, on the verge of tears at the sound.
"St-stop laughing at me! It isn't funny, you know!" he cries out, until he actually starts to cry for real. Teardrops falling to the floor with a splash, and each one leaving behind enough water to fill a bathtub.
The doorknob starts screaming something about the bottle and Jared stops long enough to finish the drink, to make himself smaller and stop making the water overflow and drown them both.
He falls into the empty bottle, and sails through the doorknob's keyhole, out into the ocean of tears he's created.
**
Eventually, Jared washes ashore.
After a rather dizzying turnabout in the caucus race of birds, Jared follows the rabbit into a curious thicket of forest.
Nothing's at all familiar to him, and Jared stops short. He's got a chill in his bones, like he's being watched, though he doesn't know how he could feel it on him, in him this deep. And then he turns to the forest, and he sees the eyes.
Eyes that glow green in the black of the forest. Eyes the color of the leaves themselves, and Jared's feet move of their own free will. A slow shuffle-step closer and closer to the green that’s staring out at him, until two familiar faces pop up into his vision and block his path.
"'Allo!" They shout in unison, pie-faced and apple-cheeked visions of Jared's schoolmate, Tom, stand before him.
"Tommy?!" Jared gasps, and the identical brothers shake their heads, making strange honking sounds of laughter.
"Twellings!" one exclaims, and both point to the nametags stitched onto their matching overalls. One reads "Twelling Dee" and the other "Twelling Dum."
"What's a Tommys?" asks the other.
"Why're you 'ere?" interrupts the first before Jared can answer.
"Did you come for a fight?" the other says, holding up fists and rolling them in the air.
"Or wouldja like to hear a story?" the Twellings ask Jared, blocking his path again when he tries to sidle away from the odd creatures.
"No, no I don't think I have the time-"
"Oh but you must!"
"You must!" they echo and yank him down to sit on a stump in the wood. "The Walrus," one begins.
"And the Carpenter," the other finishes. "Or the story of the wee little oysters."
The other Twelling clears his throat and begins, "The sun was shining-" when a peal of laughter interrupts their story.
They look up in the nearest tree, towards the source of the laughter; as the gleaming green eyes Jared was drawn to reappear in tangle of branches, and a white slice of teeth begins to reveal itself. A toothy grin, with pointy incisors joins the mouth and hisses again with laughter.
"Who's dere!?" Twelling Dee asks, twitching and turning to face the darkness. Twelling Dum clasps a hand to his mouth and stutters.
"Oh no-no-no, it's him again! Bruther we should-"
"We stay and fight!"
"We flee and live!"
The smile closes and the eyes blink shut, Jared stares, captivated at the sight.
A voice prickles its way down his neckline. "Are you really going to sit here and listen to the same tired story they always tell instead of chasing down that rabbit?" Jared yelps in surprise and trips back over a tree-stump.
His headband slips out of his hair and his bangs fall loose, obscuring his vision. That's one thing he'll say for the strange getup, at least it keeps his hair out of his eyes for once.
"Wh-who?"
Jared feels the band slide back into his hair, moved by invisible fingers that materialize slowly and he blinks at the sight of-
"Jensen?!" Only not quite Jensen, obviously, because the person leaning over him is the most un-Jensenish person he could think of. With those mad green eyes and that sharp smile, dressed in a suit of pink and purple stripes.
The Twellings scream and run around like chickens with their heads cut off. "The Cheshire Cat!" they shout and then disappear into the thick of the woods.
The not-Jensen smiles and leans back to stand, one hand on his cane. Jared rises slowly as well, taking in the full sight of the familiar stranger.
"Oh but you're-not quite Jensen, are you?"
"I'm not quite like anyone else, for I am quite like myself," the not-Jensen says, swishing his cane about like the tail of a cat. "And you're quite welcome for that. You hear one story about a Jesus-allegory and his food-obsessed companion, you've heard them all, really."
"Oh, oh well yeah. Thanks." Jared stares at his mouth, familiar feelings tickling his stomach as he thinks about the mouth, the body and the smile standing before him; sleek and suave. And the not-Jensen turns on his heels and begins to saunter off, "Wait!" Jared shouts after him.
"O' twas brillig, and the slithy toves, did gyre and gimbel in the waaaabe," not-Jensen sings, and turns back to Jared, who's reaching out to grab him by the shoulder.
"Um, hey?" Jared says, suddenly at a loss of words, pulling his hand back and shoving them both into the pockets of his jumper. "You, um, you're not leaving yet, are you? We only just-" and the not-Jensen cuts him off with the next verse of his song.
"All mimsy, were the borogroves, and the mome-raths," not-Jensen continues now moving closer and closer towards Jared. And then Jared notices the stripes of his clothes unraveling and disappearing into the air, fading into the background. "Out-graaaaabe..." the creature's voice fades with his visage until there is nothing left but a note hanging in the air.
"Mome-raths?" Jared says, and then the White Rabbit sideswipes him.
"I'm late! I'm late! Oh dear, oh my, she'll have my head for this!" the rabbit says as he hops quickly down the road.
Jared shakes off the semi-paralysis caused by the sight of not-Jensen and turns his attention back to the White Rabbit that lead him here in the first place.
"Rabbit! Hey Mr. Rabbit! Wait! Please!!" Jared shouts and takes off again, following the rabbit through the woods into a clearing where a cottage stands. The gate is open, and Jared knows it's very rude to trespass, but then he sees the rabbit poke his head out of the door.
"Marianne!" the rabbit shouts. "Marianne! Oh there you are, quickly now!" The rabbit grabs Jared and tugs him into the house, all thoughts of trespassing and rudeness now turned to the thought of Jared's grumbling stomach. The rabbit's shouting about missing gloves and asking "Marianne" where she's put them.
"Oh great," Jared grumbles. "The rabbit must think I'm a girl too."
Jared sighs and looks at himself in the wardrobe mirror "It's these clothes. I've got to change, oh! Here we go," Jared says, rifling through the rabbit's drawers for a waistcoat and perhaps a shirt and pants he can change into.
"And stay away from the candy dish!" the rabbit scolds from behind him.
"Stay away from the what?" Jared asks through the mouthful of the "Eat Me" assorted licorices he's just wolfed down. His stomach rumbles ominously, and in moments, his arms are sticking out the windows of the cottage and his legs break through the first floor and his head pokes through the thatched roof.
"Oh, those candies," Jared says sheepishly.
Everything's kind of crazy for a while, Jared could swear that below him on the ground; there's a Dodo bird trying to set him on fire.
And then he spies the carrots in the vegetable patch. One carrot later, he's about 3 and a half inches tall, and slinking away from the whole ordeal, trying to follow the rabbit as he hops through the garden again.
"You've got quite an appetite," the not-Jensen says from his perch in the tree. Jared turns to see him but he's gone like a ripple in a stream, barely a wisp of his presence remains.
Jared takes a deep breath and follows the trail the rabbit left when he took off, running away from the monster in his house. Jared heads towards the flowers towering over him like trees.
**
Part 2