dead.

[memoryontape]

there are days i feel my heart heavy.
there are days i don't wish to talk.
there are days i'm a happy facade.

today's the day
i want to bury myself.
beneath the soil
in the garden of arcadia.
sometimes i want to cut myself open
to assure myself that the blood i see
is real, fluid, re-generative.
i need to know i'm not a living corpse.
the very people to give me life
have taken it away from me.

i want to stand alone in the forest
i want you to bury me alive.
that's what all of you are doing already.
why not finish the job?
spare me from a slow painful death.

goodbye.