(no subject)
What disturbs me most is my inability to find happiness. How easy it is to fall into these wretched patterns of hatred and quickening heart-beat!
The alarm went off at 6 this morning, but I slept until 7:30 and ran out the door as quickly as possible. Typical.
I'm sick of my job. Not sick of working, but sick of playing an uphill battle in which there exists little chance to actually meet goals without cheating.
In all honesty, I'm sick of working with my clients. I'm tired of hardship and terror. Perhaps I've burnt myself out too quickly, too completely to get back on my feet. I'm not made to interface with the public, and a poor public at that. Art and joy are few and far in between. I exist on the back of some grand failure never looking down.
So what is left?
Existing. Days. Moments of small happiness too fleeting to be confused with the real thing.
The alarm went off at 6 this morning, but I slept until 7:30 and ran out the door as quickly as possible. Typical.
I'm sick of my job. Not sick of working, but sick of playing an uphill battle in which there exists little chance to actually meet goals without cheating.
In all honesty, I'm sick of working with my clients. I'm tired of hardship and terror. Perhaps I've burnt myself out too quickly, too completely to get back on my feet. I'm not made to interface with the public, and a poor public at that. Art and joy are few and far in between. I exist on the back of some grand failure never looking down.
So what is left?
Existing. Days. Moments of small happiness too fleeting to be confused with the real thing.