it's c o r t; remember me?cut_the_cameraDecember 29 2004, 08:09:12 UTC
deanna, to be straight-forward: i miss you.
you need to read this. and i don't know when you'll read it and by the time you read it, it may be a month or more from the time i post it on here, but, whenever you read it, it needs to be read.
i don't just miss you, i miss.. the real you? deanna, you've changed so much. i mean i'm fine with it if this is who you say you are, be whoever you want; that's your decision and it's not my place to tell you otherwise, and i'll still be your friend too, of course, but what i'm getting at here is.. you're just so d i f f e r e n t and i guess it wouldn't bother me as much if [i'm gonna be honest here] you didn't give me this vibe that you think i am such a bad person anymore..listen..
i remember last year.. -late night conversations online. -finishing each other's sentences. -sleepovers. -just hanging out. -helping each other through all those bad/sad moments where you just feel so lost in the world.. and trust me we had a lot of those. -occasional telephone calls..not very often.. you told me you didn't like the phone.. -your midnight snacks: macaroni &cheese and soup. -one time your mom came over to pick me up and i hopped in the car, got my yearbook out, and as we looked through the pages we were laughing nonstop, since just about the second i got in the car. and your mom said "boy.. from the moment you two get together you never stop laughing." and she smiled. i remember. -being "punk" -being "goth" i really don't want to sound like..well an ass.. but you knowww i helped you through that. -"first loves" [[i remember it all.]]
okay, anyhow, trust me the list goes on, i'm just going to stop it there for now.
dude.. i don't know, maybe you're just maturing faster than i am or something. but i miss having you around. hey, maybe i'm wrong here.. i just thought we used to be really good friends.. or maybe that's the thing.. we used to be really good friends..
and maybe you just decided you don't like me anymore, or that you arree maturing faster and you don't really need a less mature person holding you down, so you came to the conclusion that you just plain-out didn't like me. and once again that's entirely your decision. i mean.. yeah.. obviously, you don't have to like me. and maybe i should stop suggesting random "maybe's".. yeah that might be nice.
i mean.. i know i d i d e x p l o d e on you that one time about being a lot alike me, and you know i did apologize, and yeah i also know that sometimes an apology isn't really enough. but i also know that to have me, the one that said you were too much like me, sitting here, asking for your friendship back, and trying to get it for the past.. how many?.. er.. months?..would pretty much show sincerity and have the word a p o l o g e t i c written all over it.
and getting back to the "maybe's" .. maybe you changed because of what i said? because i said you were too much like me..? maybe not.. maybe i sound cocky for thinking that i caused it.. i don't want to sound like that.
i just want to know w h a t h a p p e n e d t o u s ? give it to me straight. it's cool. just do me a favor, and if you never talk to me again, just reply to this comment and let me know why we don't talk and why we aren't friends or why we can't be friends anymore if we can't .. or maybe we can, i don't know. you have the power decide on all of this.
i think now would be a good time to end this comment and shut the heck up. : \ okay i'm done <3 think about it.
Re: it's c o r t; remember me?memoriesxawayDecember 29 2004, 21:38:15 UTC
Oh cort..
Its really not that I dislike you. Really it isnt that at all. You are an awesome girl and great person who is always fun to be around...
Its not just you I've been drifting apart from..its mainly..everyone.
Since I started playing LLRO I have been doing that nonstop..its what has been on my mind during school, at home, wherever whenever.
This game lets me escape from this world..it lets me go off and be with people who like me for who I am..not what I wear..how I talk..or what kind of effing shoes I wear. I guess you can call RO my home away from home. Everyone there likes me...I'm pretty well known on the RO server..and its great.
but cort, what you said about me being to much like you unfortunitly did impact this out come to tell you the truth. :/... When you sais that I thought about who I was...first thing that came to my mind..was anime and how I like to play MMORPGS alot, something you didnt do. So I put my mind on that and eveutally became addicted to the damn game. It really is addicting if you would try it.
but it seems that I will try to get out of anything so I can play RO...spending time with friends...family..whatever. And I ave noticed me being alot anti social latly..and my mom even pointed out that I was becoming anti social because of this game.
but it something I am choosing to do right now...play this game because it does entirly make me happy. I eventually should get over this little spell of wanting to play it 24/7...heck I sometimes go a day without eating because of it...but the good thing is the server sometimes goes down which is when I go and eat. Its not like I dont want to eat or anything...its jus that I get so caught up in the game that I forget all about eating and other things.
~but I'm sorry for neglecting you during all of this...but know your not the only one effected...and I also miss those good old days when we would laugh over every little thing and how hard we would laugh
THE GOOD OLD DAYS
Your one hairy leg 'PEEENNISS" Catapillar in the sleeping bag Crying at the same time at sleep overs but no admitting it Waking up at 1pm (by the way this has gotten worse for me..I woke up at 3 today!) late night chats Talking about our "band" Talking about teh Bois and all in all having an effing good time.
it's corrrttie againncut_the_cameraDecember 30 2004, 00:28:13 UTC
the funny thing is.. how appropriate your LJ name is.."memoriesxaway" ..hah
anyhow.. i can understand this game or.. well i think it's a game?.. being addictive and hey i'm ok with that.. i deffffinitely get zoned out into stuff and forget, 'hey! i have a life!' yeah so that's cool.
and let me tell you something, to be honest, i'm just about as lost as a needle in a haystack right now. i mean.. as far as knowing who i am. so let me telllll youu, i pretty much had no room to tell you to back off of being so much like me. i don't even know who me is. so yeah.. not like it's gonna make a big difference, it just may help to know that i was.. basically..a jerkhole for saying that. (:
and through all of this, i'm just trying to say: i think what we had, was too precious, or rare, to waste it away.
. well that's all i have to say for now. thanks for commenting back.. and i wouldn't..er.. mind another comment back.. ;)
. <3 thanks for thinking about it/explaining, because you didn't have to, so i appreciate it.
you need to read this. and i don't know when you'll read it and by the time you read it, it may be a month or more from the time i post it on here, but, whenever you read it, it needs to be read.
i don't just miss you, i miss.. the real you? deanna, you've changed so much. i mean i'm fine with it if this is who you say you are, be whoever you want; that's your decision and it's not my place to tell you otherwise, and i'll still be your friend too, of course, but what i'm getting at here is.. you're just so d i f f e r e n t and i guess it wouldn't bother me as much if [i'm gonna be honest here] you didn't give me this vibe that you think i am such a bad person anymore..listen..
i remember last year..
-late night conversations online.
-finishing each other's sentences.
-sleepovers.
-just hanging out.
-helping each other through all those bad/sad moments where you just feel so lost in the world.. and trust me we had a lot of those.
-occasional telephone calls..not very often.. you told me you didn't like the phone..
-your midnight snacks: macaroni &cheese and soup.
-one time your mom came over to pick me up and i hopped in the car, got my yearbook out, and as we looked through the pages we were laughing nonstop, since just about the second i got in the car. and your mom said "boy.. from the moment you two get together you never stop laughing." and she smiled. i remember.
-being "punk"
-being "goth" i really don't want to sound like..well an ass.. but you knowww i helped you through that.
-"first loves"
[[i remember it all.]]
okay, anyhow, trust me the list goes on, i'm just going to stop it there for now.
dude.. i don't know, maybe you're just maturing faster than i am or something. but i miss having you around. hey, maybe i'm wrong here.. i just thought we used to be really good friends.. or maybe that's the thing.. we used to be really good friends..
and maybe you just decided you don't like me anymore, or that you arree maturing faster and you don't really need a less mature person holding you down, so you came to the conclusion that you just plain-out didn't like me. and once again that's entirely your decision. i mean.. yeah.. obviously, you don't have to like me. and maybe i should stop suggesting random "maybe's".. yeah that might be nice.
i mean.. i know i d i d e x p l o d e on you that one time about being a lot alike me, and you know i did apologize, and yeah i also know that sometimes an apology isn't really enough. but i also know that to have me, the one that said you were too much like me, sitting here, asking for your friendship back, and trying to get it for the past.. how many?.. er.. months?..would pretty much show sincerity and have the word a p o l o g e t i c written all over it.
and getting back to the "maybe's" .. maybe you changed because of what i said? because i said you were too much like me..? maybe not.. maybe i sound cocky for thinking that i caused it.. i don't want to sound like that.
i just want to know w h a t h a p p e n e d t o u s ?
give it to me straight. it's cool.
just do me a favor, and if you never talk to me again, just reply to this comment and let me know why we don't talk and why we aren't friends or why we can't be friends anymore if we can't .. or maybe we can, i don't know. you have the power decide on all of this.
i think now would be a good time to end this comment and shut the heck up. : \
okay i'm done <3 think about it.
Reply
Its really not that I dislike you. Really it isnt that at all. You are an awesome girl and great person who is always fun to be around...
Its not just you I've been drifting apart from..its mainly..everyone.
Since I started playing LLRO I have been doing that nonstop..its what has been on my mind during school, at home, wherever whenever.
This game lets me escape from this world..it lets me go off and be with people who like me for who I am..not what I wear..how I talk..or what kind of effing shoes I wear. I guess you can call RO my home away from home. Everyone there likes me...I'm pretty well known on the RO server..and its great.
but cort, what you said about me being to much like you unfortunitly did impact this out come to tell you the truth. :/... When you sais that I thought about who I was...first thing that came to my mind..was anime and how I like to play MMORPGS alot, something you didnt do. So I put my mind on that and eveutally became addicted to the damn game. It really is addicting if you would try it.
but it seems that I will try to get out of anything so I can play RO...spending time with friends...family..whatever. And I ave noticed me being alot anti social latly..and my mom even pointed out that I was becoming anti social because of this game.
but it something I am choosing to do right now...play this game because it does entirly make me happy. I eventually should get over this little spell of wanting to play it 24/7...heck I sometimes go a day without eating because of it...but the good thing is the server sometimes goes down which is when I go and eat. Its not like I dont want to eat or anything...its jus that I get so caught up in the game that I forget all about eating and other things.
~but I'm sorry for neglecting you during all of this...but know your not the only one effected...and I also miss those good old days when we would laugh over every little thing and how hard we would laugh
THE GOOD OLD DAYS
Your one hairy leg
'PEEENNISS"
Catapillar in the sleeping bag
Crying at the same time at sleep overs but no admitting it
Waking up at 1pm (by the way this has gotten worse for me..I woke up at 3 today!)
late night chats
Talking about our "band"
Talking about teh Bois
and all in all having an effing good time.
okay..I'm done
<3 thought about it. Thats my reply. <33
Reply
anyhow.. i can understand this game or.. well i think it's a game?.. being addictive and hey i'm ok with that.. i deffffinitely get zoned out into stuff and forget, 'hey! i have a life!' yeah so that's cool.
and let me tell you something, to be honest, i'm just about as lost as a needle in a haystack right now. i mean.. as far as knowing who i am. so let me telllll youu, i pretty much had no room to tell you to back off of being so much like me. i don't even know who me is. so yeah.. not like it's gonna make a big difference, it just may help to know that i was.. basically..a jerkhole for saying that. (:
and through all of this, i'm just trying to say: i think what we had, was too precious, or rare, to waste it away.
.
well that's all i have to say for now. thanks for commenting back.. and i wouldn't..er.. mind another comment back.. ;)
.
<3 thanks for thinking about it/explaining, because you didn't have to, so i appreciate it.
Reply
Leave a comment