Hand Of Sorrow Series
Phase 3: Reminiscent
Donghae.
HIS Donghae was ONCE broken.
No scratch that, he was ONCE destroyed.
why? because he loved a man that loved someone else; a man that didnt love him back. And he knew that, but forced on, because he insisted that what he felt for that man was real. was love. IS love.
Kibum was dragged away from his thoughts as his phone vibrated in his hand. Once. Then twice. Slowly attaching together his thoughts, he looked at the display. [One new text] At the sight of the caller ID on the text, a smile - unknowingly - spread across his lips, as he unlocked the phone and read the message. The smile dragged on longer at the sight of the content and in pretense of going to the washroom, exited the set of his drama recording, and sneaked up the stairs to the level above their film set.
Once away from all ears, Kibum re-read the message,
" I miss you. Call me"
His eyes twinkling as the smile spread further apart, he called back, and was surprised - and touched- to have his call answered after the first ring.
"Kibum-sshi" Donghae's voice flew from the other end of the line, his name entrapped in his silky voice.
--------------
He watched. He watched silently.
Like a tiger prowling its pray, he watched, as Donghae that was so stiff and ignorant about his presence smile- no literally grin from ear to ear- while conversing over the phone with Kibum. He searched Donghae's face for a single, a single, expression, that denied his happiness over Kibum, but he only found more proof as Donghae's expressions softened, his eyes steadily emitting the overflow of happiness that was being stirred within him.
But Siwon's gaze, spoke ver little of harm compared to as it did pain, while he silently watched Donghae spilling his joy to the world, when he himself, was falling apart.
----------------
"ah~ hmmm" ,
Kibum listened, content, as Donghae speed train trail about his day, while he simply interjected here or a few moments there, only to assure that Donghae that he was listening. But what he really wanted? to listen to Donghae's voice for as long as he could.
Donghae trailing on, Kibum's mind wandered to when he first found out about what the relationship between - more precisely; WAS between- Donghae and Siwon was.
It was lunch break after trainee exercises a few months after Siwon and Donghae first met, when Eyunhuk, him and their other close friends- Siwon and Donghae included, gathered together to eat. Noticing how happy Donghae seemed and how much Eyunhuk was teasing him for it, he had inquired about it to which Eyunhuk has snickered and whispered to him how Siwon and Donghae were dating.
The smile was wiped from his face, as he watched Donghae tease Eyunhuk back, making fun of him and Sungminnie.
The world died around him, and it was just Donghae in his eyes, and Donghae sheepishly peering at Siwon who was sitting next to Eyunhuk, across from him. The words that he wished to say, were caught in his throat, and his breath shortened as he silently got up and walked out, waving a hand to dissolve the looks of questions from Eyunhuk and Donghae. He slid into the bathroom, and had stood there, staring at the wash basin, letting Eyunhuk's words settle in. Eyes watering from the thought of watching HIS beloved Donghae with another man, with Siwon, he staggered into a stall as someone came crashing into the bathroom.
-------------
He held his hand, so tightly yet to softly, tight enough to not be able to break hold, yet soft enough to not harm him, as he dragged him steadily but carefully into the men's bathroom. He heard a movements from within a stall, and dropped his hand away from the hand he was holding and moved to the mirror, acting normal. A stall door opened,
"Hello Siwon-sshi! Good work" Eetuk greeted him and turned around and faced the man behind him. With a slight nod and a swift compliment of "Ryewook-sshi your voice and dance moves are really good. great work", Eetuk turned on his heels and left.
Taken into account that they were the only two in the bathroom, Siwon pushed Ryewook against the wall, once again careful not to bruise him, and slowly, his voice barely above a whisper, pleaded, his voice cracking in all the wrong places,
"Ryewook. Please. Please come back. You love me more than you love him right? You loved me then, remember?" his throat drying, his eyes stinging threatening to burst out in emotional floods.
"I-I Can-t. I l-"Ryewook hesitated a moment but then, raising his eyes to look straight at Siwon, his voice steady, replied, "I love Yesung Hyung. I'm sorry Siwon Hyung", breaking free from Siwon as his hands feel to his sides as he dropped to his knees. Stopping at the door, Ryeowook looked back at the man that he once loved, but with a steading breath walked out, stopping himself from reaching out to Shiwon, in fear of giving him false hope.
Donghae.
HIS Donghae was ONCE broken.
No scratch that, he was ONCE destroyed.
why? because he loved a man that loved someone else; a man that didnt love him back. And he knew that, but forced on, because he insisted that what he felt for that man was real. was love. IS love.
Kibum was dragged away from his thoughts as his phone vibrated in his hand. Once. Then twice. Slowly attaching together his thoughts, he looked at the display. [One new text] At the sight of the caller ID on the text, a smile - unknowingly - spread across his lips, as he unlocked the phone and read the message. The smile dragged on longer at the sight of the content and in pretense of going to the washroom, exited the set of his drama recording, and sneaked up the stairs to the level above their film set.
Once away from all ears, Kibum re-read the message,
" I miss you. Call me"
His eyes twinkling as the smile spread further apart, he called back, and was surprised - and touched- to have his call answered after the first ring.
"Kibum-sshi" Donghae's voice flew from the other end of the line, his name entrapped in his silky voice.
--------------
He watched. He watched silently.
Like a tiger prowling its pray, he watched, as Donghae that was so stiff and ignorant about his presence smile- no literally grin from ear to ear- while conversing over the phone with Kibum. He searched Donghae's face for a single, a single, expression, that denied his happiness over Kibum, but he only found more proof as Donghae's expressions softened, his eyes steadily emitting the overflow of happiness that was being stirred within him.
But Siwon's gaze, spoke ver little of harm compared to as it did pain, while he silently watched Donghae spilling his joy to the world, when he himself, was falling apart.
----------------
"ah~ hmmm" ,
Kibum listened, content, as Donghae speed train trail about his day, while he simply interjected here or a few moments there, only to assure that Donghae that he was listening. But what he really wanted? to listen to Donghae's voice for as long as he could.
Donghae trailing on, Kibum's mind wandered to when he first found out about what the relationship between - more precisely; WAS between- Donghae and Siwon was.
It was lunch break after trainee exercises a few months after Siwon and Donghae first met, when Eyunhuk, him and their other close friends- Siwon and Donghae included, gathered together to eat. Noticing how happy Donghae seemed and how much Eyunhuk was teasing him for it, he had inquired about it to which Eyunhuk has snickered and whispered to him how Siwon and Donghae were dating.
The smile was wiped from his face, as he watched Donghae tease Eyunhuk back, making fun of him and Sungminnie.
The world died around him, and it was just Donghae in his eyes, and Donghae sheepishly peering at Siwon who was sitting next to Eyunhuk, across from him. The words that he wished to say, were caught in his throat, and his breath shortened as he silently got up and walked out, waving a hand to dissolve the looks of questions from Eyunhuk and Donghae. He slid into the bathroom, and had stood there, staring at the wash basin, letting Eyunhuk's words settle in. Eyes watering from the thought of watching HIS beloved Donghae with another man, with Siwon, he staggered into a stall as someone came crashing into the bathroom.
-------------
He held his hand, so tightly yet to softly, tight enough to not be able to break hold, yet soft enough to not harm him, as he dragged him steadily but carefully into the men's bathroom. He heard a movements from within a stall, and dropped his hand away from the hand he was holding and moved to the mirror, acting normal. A stall door opened,
"Hello Siwon-sshi! Good work" Eetuk greeted him and turned around and faced the man behind him. With a slight nod and a swift compliment of "Ryewook-sshi your voice and dance moves are really good. great work", Eetuk turned on his heels and left.
Taken into account that they were the only two in the bathroom, Siwon pushed Ryewook against the wall, once again careful not to bruise him, and slowly, his voice barely above a whisper, pleaded, his voice cracking in all the wrong places,
"Ryewook. Please. Please come back. You love me more than you love him right? You loved me then, remember?" his throat drying, his eyes stinging threatening to burst out in emotional floods.
"I-I Can-t. I l-"Ryewook hesitated a moment but then, raising his eyes to look straight at Siwon, his voice steady, replied, "I love Yesung Hyung. I'm sorry Siwon Hyung", breaking free from Siwon as his hands feel to his sides as he dropped to his knees. Stopping at the door, Ryeowook looked back at the man that he once loved, but with a steading breath walked out, stopping himself from reaching out to Shiwon, in fear of giving him false hope.