So the Sap of Maldoror Unpathed
My lungs are a bit sore. That's fine, that's fine. It's all over good friend. No more spirits in the shade of my spleen. I've found a beast to cordially shake the hand of a would be man inside of me. Darwin would have been proud.
Four years ago I was suffering through a drought of transition. Paintings became some interjecting conversation for the pretentious, poems were for those on a verbose diet, and music was loosing it's faith now that Bob Dylan and Ray Charles was booted off of American Idol. Little did I know I would find myself at the pub a year later, suddenly opening up and soothing the ever so talkative thought train in my head. Thinking too much in an uncontrollable manner is a very common thing when you don't have gods or schizophrenia to talk to on a refreshing bedway night. When them thar booze hit my soul I seemed to let go of all of it's critical mannerisms. What joy! What release! It's everything! Every colour! Every Light! Every Note!
Whadda putz, hyphen
Ahh the meantime pressure of excess and it's following. Practically drunk every night for three years or so. And you know, I can't remember most of it besides the mistakes (there were MANY). Can't regret though.... no sir! If I die tomorrow at least I will always know that nothing stopped me yesterday. So here I am... out of the delirium decembers.... how do I feel?
wait.
Am I saying I quit drinking and never will go back to it again? Not likely. Now having a clearer window from whence I gave up the foul lovely horrible stank of flowerly pain in the ass I realize who I was in sobriety. When I said I can't regret though....well.... there was a bit of truth lacking. The whole reason why I stopped this foolish inebriate experimenting was not specifically from the pain I had caused others, though I do share empathy from their side of the grass. No doubt, there was this child born in 1979 and spent many years without nicotine, alcohol, tweed, and caffeine. I want to meet him again. That being the old me. Time to break out the old Beta home videos and take notes.Time to play with what I love to do instead of working to get to some conclusive dream goal. That's how all this started, with imagining and learning. Never condemning. Understanding more.
There is another half though I can only speak so much about. I'm not sure how terminal it is to my personality. mmmmmmm vague.....
Through the mistakes I've made under ye ole Booze n' Chain I've lost a lot of people in my life. I'm starting to see something and someone wonderful coming out of that. My newest incarnation of personality. All I need is a match and my shoes then soon will be on the road with this other new creative experiment. mmmmmmm ambiguous.......
this is a secret.
I shall curtsy off with this writing I wrote predating all of this. Seems accurate.
The Good Dr is in, Lunakkin is in to tell you about
The fine visions out from your bedroom theatre window
This is surely an odd place to be, yes sir
Just keep in mind that the grass is greener from all sides
So do what, do what they see from windows
Within our gelatinous gallery of eyes?
Good question, thank you doctor
We see a well paved road
Coated in rubble, sticks and stones
From that one morning you woke up
Realized you were an earthquake
Shall we go for a walk?
Sure why not
Let's go talk about this
Turn the page and put your shoes on
Why do I feel like a solid on some liquid days?
To be honest, just been trying to grip on myself
To find that catharsis to be intimate
Do you think I need to loose someone dear to me?
Cancer?
H.I.V.?
Son, tragedies can lead to enlightenment
but not in every case from a lack of motivation
Why not make a deal with the devil
if you're asking for hell to appreciate heaven?
Some great dawning from the yawning void
You open your mouth and place it down
See the nonsense that you're talking about
Just as the camera shifts you see the same in everyone else
I've made my mistakes taking chances
Advancements now lead me to proceed
So Good Dr, I will let time no longer tell.
Four years ago I was suffering through a drought of transition. Paintings became some interjecting conversation for the pretentious, poems were for those on a verbose diet, and music was loosing it's faith now that Bob Dylan and Ray Charles was booted off of American Idol. Little did I know I would find myself at the pub a year later, suddenly opening up and soothing the ever so talkative thought train in my head. Thinking too much in an uncontrollable manner is a very common thing when you don't have gods or schizophrenia to talk to on a refreshing bedway night. When them thar booze hit my soul I seemed to let go of all of it's critical mannerisms. What joy! What release! It's everything! Every colour! Every Light! Every Note!
Whadda putz, hyphen
Ahh the meantime pressure of excess and it's following. Practically drunk every night for three years or so. And you know, I can't remember most of it besides the mistakes (there were MANY). Can't regret though.... no sir! If I die tomorrow at least I will always know that nothing stopped me yesterday. So here I am... out of the delirium decembers.... how do I feel?
wait.
Am I saying I quit drinking and never will go back to it again? Not likely. Now having a clearer window from whence I gave up the foul lovely horrible stank of flowerly pain in the ass I realize who I was in sobriety. When I said I can't regret though....well.... there was a bit of truth lacking. The whole reason why I stopped this foolish inebriate experimenting was not specifically from the pain I had caused others, though I do share empathy from their side of the grass. No doubt, there was this child born in 1979 and spent many years without nicotine, alcohol, tweed, and caffeine. I want to meet him again. That being the old me. Time to break out the old Beta home videos and take notes.Time to play with what I love to do instead of working to get to some conclusive dream goal. That's how all this started, with imagining and learning. Never condemning. Understanding more.
There is another half though I can only speak so much about. I'm not sure how terminal it is to my personality. mmmmmmm vague.....
Through the mistakes I've made under ye ole Booze n' Chain I've lost a lot of people in my life. I'm starting to see something and someone wonderful coming out of that. My newest incarnation of personality. All I need is a match and my shoes then soon will be on the road with this other new creative experiment. mmmmmmm ambiguous.......
this is a secret.
I shall curtsy off with this writing I wrote predating all of this. Seems accurate.
The Good Dr is in, Lunakkin is in to tell you about
The fine visions out from your bedroom theatre window
This is surely an odd place to be, yes sir
Just keep in mind that the grass is greener from all sides
So do what, do what they see from windows
Within our gelatinous gallery of eyes?
Good question, thank you doctor
We see a well paved road
Coated in rubble, sticks and stones
From that one morning you woke up
Realized you were an earthquake
Shall we go for a walk?
Sure why not
Let's go talk about this
Turn the page and put your shoes on
Why do I feel like a solid on some liquid days?
To be honest, just been trying to grip on myself
To find that catharsis to be intimate
Do you think I need to loose someone dear to me?
Cancer?
H.I.V.?
Son, tragedies can lead to enlightenment
but not in every case from a lack of motivation
Why not make a deal with the devil
if you're asking for hell to appreciate heaven?
Some great dawning from the yawning void
You open your mouth and place it down
See the nonsense that you're talking about
Just as the camera shifts you see the same in everyone else
I've made my mistakes taking chances
Advancements now lead me to proceed
So Good Dr, I will let time no longer tell.