Resident Evil: Afterlife
Katie is a Milla Jovovich fan, so yesterday we went to see Resident Evil: Afterlife. It was bad. I don't mean mediocre, or not my thing. This was an unambiguously terrible movie. The plot made no sense, the character development was pitiful, and the whole basis for the zombies was diluted. To keep you from having to see it yourselves I'm going to summarize.
The camera zooms in on Tokyo where a crowd of people walk through a busy intersection. In the middle of it all is a girl, whose body we slowly circle during the credits. After waiting for a couple minutes while nothing happens, the girl all of a sudden chomps the person next to her. The zombie plague has begun.
The camera again zooms in on Tokyo, this time dark and lifeless (but not deadless). A Milla voice-over informs us that the Umbrella corporation did this, and that the people responsible are hiding in an underground fortress, continuing their research. Milla is out for REVENGE!
MOTIVATIONS
* Why would a corporation whose only customers were governments and militaries continue operation after the end of the world?
* Why would scientists whose work has just destroyed human civilization want to continue researching?
* Where do the hundreds of people in this base get food? There aren't any farms in Tokyo.
Milla executes a Mission Impossible-style infiltration, taking out a wave of soldiers with ninja stars, katanas, submachine guns, and slow-motion cinematography while guitars wail furiously in the background. Then she takes out another wave with magic.
No, seriously. Magic. She makes the room explode with her eyes. The T-virus can do this now, I guess. It's no good, though, because she gets shot from behind. The End. But wait -- two more Millas come in and shoot everyone! Why are there Milla clones? Who knows? I didn't see the last movie.
The only real threat is big badass Wesker, chairman of the board (for the deceased shareholders?). Wesker shoots his subordinates in the head because he is evil. Wesker also has superpowers and manages to escape in a plane/helicopter thing while Milla clones kill everyone else. He blows up the entire base and all the Milla clones to show how evil he is. The real Milla sneaks on board his vehicle and puts a gun to his head, but Wesker stabs her with something that instantly neutralizes her superpowers. Then he beats the crap out of her because HE IS EVIL, SO VERY EVIL. Unfortunately for him, he forgot to put the plane on autopilot so it crashes into Mount Fuji, and we're treated to a super-slow-motion scene of both of them flying through the air because neither of them buckled up. Milla emerges from the wreckage, shaken and covered with soot but unharmed, believing her revenge to be complete.
PHYSICS
Two people are in a fiery plane crash. Which one should crawl out of the wreckage?
A. The ordinary human who didn't buckle up
B. The super-powered bad guy who doesn't need to buckle up
Milla flies to Alaska to search for Arcadia, the source of radio broadcasts advertising a zombie-free sanctuary. Her friends, the actual Resident Evil characters, went there in the last movie. She lands and finds a bunch of abandoned planes and the empty helicopter that once held her friends and sad music. While exploring she hears a noise and opens a door and OH SHIT CROWS FLY OUT OF AN EMPTY PLANE! We all breathe a sigh of relief and OH SHIT SHE'S ATTACKED BY A GIRL WITH A KNIFE who turns out to be Claire Redfield, driven mad by a mechanical spider-thing attached to her chest that's administering berzerker memory-loss drugs. Claire won't get her memory back until the plot demands it, so Milla takes her along so they can "explore the coast" (if you know what I mean). By the way, everything Milla says in her plane (including her video blogging) is overheard by a satellite that can pick out human voices over a propeller engine FROM ORBIT. Yes, really.
Eventually they reach LA, where they spot survivors on the roof of a skyscraper prison. The prison is surrounded by a horde of zombies, so Milla lands on the roof... barely. We are introduced to our cast of disposable secondary characters.
ROLL CALL
Token Black Guy, a former basketball player
Traitor, a former film producer who still thinks he's the most important person in the world EVEN WHILE TRAPPED IN A PRISON SURROUNDED BY HUNDREDS OF BLOODTHIRSTY ZOMBIES
Intern, the producer's assistant who for some reason still listens to him
Hot Girl, a wannabe actress whose main purpose in the film is to have a nice chest
Mechanic, a mechanic and token hispanic guy
Zom-Bait, a guy who's going to die soon
Half an hour in, the real movie has begun. The survivors are trying to get to Arcadia too. It turns out to be a cargo ship anchored in the harbor. The plane only seats two, so they need a plan. Enter Chris, a prisoner who claims to be with the army. He knows a way but wants out of his cage first. Some prisoners played a prank on him and locked him in the cage, and now the survivors don't trust him because he has "the eyes of a killer", and because he's kind of a dick when talking to people. Milla rolls out her ninja toolkit and shows them that she's a killer too! (Incidentally, we will never see these tools again.) Zom-Bait hears noises in the walls but there's nothing there... yet.
The action begins when Milla takes a shower. (Not like that, unfortunately.) A zombie tunnels up from the ground and eats Zom-Bait, who was peeping nearby. Milla and some guitars kill the zombie. The zombies now have tendrils that burst out of their mouths. I think they took this idea from Resident Evil 4, but those were brain parasites, not zombies. Now everyone *really* needs to escape, so they let Chris out to reveal The Plan.
THE PLAN
There's a military personnel carrier that someone borrowed from Left 4 Dead parked in the garage. All they have to do is start it up, drive over the zombies to the beach, then transfer to a boat and set sail for Arcadia.
Mechanic has to cut open the door, which will take time. BUT THEY DON'T HAVE TIME, because a ten foot tall zombie with a giant axe/hammer and a burlap sack over his head starts pounding on the gate. This is definitely ripped from RE4 but makes even less sense because he didn't come from anywhere and there's nobody to give him an axe *or* a sack, but WE DON'T HAVE TIME to worry about this so Chris suggests going to the basement and getting weapons from the huge armory the army left behind. Thanks for not mentioning that before! Milla, Chris, and Hot Girl go for the weapons while Mechanic, Traitor, and Intern open the door. Problem: the basement is flooded. Solution: Hot Girl was a swimming champ! She volunteers to swim to the guns, and the other two go with her -- wait, what?
LOST IN TRANSLATION
By the way, Chris is really Claire's brother. The movie probably would have been better if they were the main characters. The first RE movie made the bizarre choice to create an entirely new main character and we've been stuck with her ever since. RE had two perfectly good action girls (Claire Redfield and Jill Valentine) so there was no reason to add a new one.
Meanwhile, Team B reaches the vehicle and finds that the engine has been removed. Traitor shoots Mechanic because HE IS AN ASSHOLE, then runs off with Intern. Team A holds their breath for over three minutes before they reach a convenient air pocket with the weapons. As they emerge from the water, a zombie grabs Hot Girl and drags her under, then more zombies emerge. Chris and Milla open fire with their SOAKING WET PISTOLS, then lock themselves in with the guns and escape through an air shaft.
Everyone somehow meets up on the roof. Traitor is stealing Milla's two-seat plane and is trying to get Intern to join him. Intern refuses, so Traitor takes off and almost crashes, cutting a bloody swath through the zombies which magically doesn't destroy the plane or propeller. The others are pissed but THEY DON'T HAVE TIME TO BE PISSED because a horde of zombies swarms the roof. Claire tosses Milla a gun in slow motion and everyone and the guitars open fire. They run to the elevator but Milla has a different plan. She runs away from the zombies, stops and shoots for a bit for no reason, then runs again, hurling herself off the roof while clinging to a wire. She throws a bomb to kill the zombies even though they just run off the roof anyway.
At ground level, Milla is surrounded by zombies. Maybe she should have thrown the bomb off the roof instead. She runs through the horde, shooting in slow-motion while the zombies fail to grab her in a very unconvincing way. Token Black Guy closes the door behind her as she runs through.
PLAN B
Go through the zombie tunnels to the sewers, then follow the storm drains to the ocean.
The survivors start to enter the tunnels, but we still have too many cast members so Big Axe Guy bursts into the bathroom and kills Intern. Milla fights him but gets knocked out, so Claire uses super kung fu to beat him back. They shoot him in the head a few times and he goes down. BUT HE'S NOT DONE! With guitars still wailing, he does an over-the-shoulder axe hurl which Milla and Claire limbo under (yes, really). Then they shoot him in the head *again* and it explodes in such a fake-looking way that their special effects guy should have been fired on the spot. We're talking 1980s quality here.
Everyone makes it through the sewers, but right as Token Black Guy is about to drop down to the storm drain he makes the crucial mistake of looking back and gets dragged off by zombies. Oh well. Now we're down to Milla, Claire, and Chris, the real cast members. They take a boat to the Good Ship Arcadia, which is deserted. The ship's log shows all the lifeboats were launched but 2000 passengers are still on board? They find a big clean while room that is definitely not part of a normal cargo ship. It's a cryo-stasis chamber! Claire remembers everything now. Umbrella was picking up survivors and locking them in stasis for experimentation. Why? Who knows? Milla orders all the prisoners released even though they have no source of food or fresh water for 2000 people. One of the prisoners is a character from the previous movie named K-Mart and we're supposed to be happy to see her.
Yes, her name is really K-Mart.
A WORD OF ADVICE
If you ever find two thousand people in cryo-stasis, do the logistics planning *before* you release them. It's okay to think it through. After all, they're not going anywhere.
I keep hoping the movie will end but Milla finds a bloody trail going from an empty chamber to the next room that definitely wasn't there before but I don't think the director realized that. The next room just has some operating tables with emaciated corpses and... big bad Wesker! The T-virus kept Wesker alive but it's trying to take over his body (whatever that means). Milla successfully merged with the virus before so Wesker wants to eat her to get her DNA.
Yes, he really wants to eat her for her DNA. Also, his eyes glow red through his sunglasses because he is evil. Also, he has zombie dogs for pets because he is evil. Also, his zombie dogs have heads that split in half that were totally ripped off from Silent Hill BECAUSE HE IS REALLY REALLY EVIL! Also, Traitor is now working for him and takes Milla's guns because... well, you get the idea. The zombie dogs surround Milla. Enter Chris and Claire, who attack Wesker. Wesker fights back with super teleporting speed that looks like something out of a breakfast cereal ad. Meanwhile, the zombie dogs just stand still for no obvious reason.
THE SOUNDTRACK
I can't describe in words how bad the soundtrack is. I'd say it was algorithmically generated, but no computer could make music this bad. It goes something like this:
Wesker: *throws a punch*
Guitars: *START WAILING FURIOUSLY*
Wesker: *completes his punch and stands still for a second*
Guitars: *stop wailing*
Wesker: *throws another punch*
Guitars: *START WAILING FURIOUSLY AGAIN*
Claire: *says something*
Guitars: *become all subdued and moody*
This happens on a second-by-second basis. It's very distracting.
The siblings are defeated and knocked into cryo-stasis chambers, which slowly sink into the ground. Chris takes a long time to think of shooting the wall but it doesn't work. Now that that's done with, zombie dogs attack! Milla grabs her gun, kills one dog, and kicks a sheet of falling plate glass into the other, cutting it in half. (She lost her superpowers half an hour into the movie, but I think the director forgot about that.) Anyway, she shoots Wesker in the head and releases Chris and Claire. K-Mart saves the day by stopping Traitor from killing Milla.
Wesker's not done (did anyone doubt this?) but Chris and Claire shoot him a lot so he goes down again. They lock Traitor in the room, and as they leave he's yelling "YOU CAN'T DO THIS! I'M A PRODUCER!". Seriously. No human being could ever be this stupid.
Now everyone's okay (aside from the lack of food and water), except -- OH WAIT, WESKER LIVES! He eats Traitor and escapes in a plane, then triggers the self-destruct for the ship BECAUSE HE IS EVIL! (All Umbrella facilities have self-destructs, but this is canon in the games so it's okay.) Unfortunately for him, Milla put the self-destruct bomb in his plane because she knew he would escape instead of just eating them all? I don't know. Anyway, he explodes.
RULE #2: THE DOUBLE-TAP
You could have just set his body on fire, guys. There's no need for these elaborate plans.
Milla decides to make good on the promise of the Arcadia and starts broadcasting the message that it's a safe place for survivors even though they're all going to die of thirst soon. And then comes the only cool moment in the movie. TOKEN BLACK GUY LIVES! He emerges from the sewer victorious, kills a couple zombies just for good measure, and tosses off a sassy one-liner that I forgot. We don't get to see any more of him, though, so I don't know why they brought him back.
Everything's all wrapped up and it's time to end the movie, so dozens of Umbrella plane/helicopter things approach the ship and hover menacingly overhead.
THE END
(Yes, really.)
(I'm not joking. They really did a cliffhanger for this awful piece of dreck.)
(Where did the planes even come from, anyway? Wesker's dead. Who else cares enough to stage a military assault on some of the few fellow human beings left alive?)
(I've heard there's another sequel hook in the credits but if you thought I was going to stick around for the credits you're out of your mind.)
The camera zooms in on Tokyo where a crowd of people walk through a busy intersection. In the middle of it all is a girl, whose body we slowly circle during the credits. After waiting for a couple minutes while nothing happens, the girl all of a sudden chomps the person next to her. The zombie plague has begun.
The camera again zooms in on Tokyo, this time dark and lifeless (but not deadless). A Milla voice-over informs us that the Umbrella corporation did this, and that the people responsible are hiding in an underground fortress, continuing their research. Milla is out for REVENGE!
MOTIVATIONS
* Why would a corporation whose only customers were governments and militaries continue operation after the end of the world?
* Why would scientists whose work has just destroyed human civilization want to continue researching?
* Where do the hundreds of people in this base get food? There aren't any farms in Tokyo.
Milla executes a Mission Impossible-style infiltration, taking out a wave of soldiers with ninja stars, katanas, submachine guns, and slow-motion cinematography while guitars wail furiously in the background. Then she takes out another wave with magic.
No, seriously. Magic. She makes the room explode with her eyes. The T-virus can do this now, I guess. It's no good, though, because she gets shot from behind. The End. But wait -- two more Millas come in and shoot everyone! Why are there Milla clones? Who knows? I didn't see the last movie.
The only real threat is big badass Wesker, chairman of the board (for the deceased shareholders?). Wesker shoots his subordinates in the head because he is evil. Wesker also has superpowers and manages to escape in a plane/helicopter thing while Milla clones kill everyone else. He blows up the entire base and all the Milla clones to show how evil he is. The real Milla sneaks on board his vehicle and puts a gun to his head, but Wesker stabs her with something that instantly neutralizes her superpowers. Then he beats the crap out of her because HE IS EVIL, SO VERY EVIL. Unfortunately for him, he forgot to put the plane on autopilot so it crashes into Mount Fuji, and we're treated to a super-slow-motion scene of both of them flying through the air because neither of them buckled up. Milla emerges from the wreckage, shaken and covered with soot but unharmed, believing her revenge to be complete.
PHYSICS
Two people are in a fiery plane crash. Which one should crawl out of the wreckage?
A. The ordinary human who didn't buckle up
B. The super-powered bad guy who doesn't need to buckle up
Milla flies to Alaska to search for Arcadia, the source of radio broadcasts advertising a zombie-free sanctuary. Her friends, the actual Resident Evil characters, went there in the last movie. She lands and finds a bunch of abandoned planes and the empty helicopter that once held her friends and sad music. While exploring she hears a noise and opens a door and OH SHIT CROWS FLY OUT OF AN EMPTY PLANE! We all breathe a sigh of relief and OH SHIT SHE'S ATTACKED BY A GIRL WITH A KNIFE who turns out to be Claire Redfield, driven mad by a mechanical spider-thing attached to her chest that's administering berzerker memory-loss drugs. Claire won't get her memory back until the plot demands it, so Milla takes her along so they can "explore the coast" (if you know what I mean). By the way, everything Milla says in her plane (including her video blogging) is overheard by a satellite that can pick out human voices over a propeller engine FROM ORBIT. Yes, really.
Eventually they reach LA, where they spot survivors on the roof of a skyscraper prison. The prison is surrounded by a horde of zombies, so Milla lands on the roof... barely. We are introduced to our cast of disposable secondary characters.
ROLL CALL
Token Black Guy, a former basketball player
Traitor, a former film producer who still thinks he's the most important person in the world EVEN WHILE TRAPPED IN A PRISON SURROUNDED BY HUNDREDS OF BLOODTHIRSTY ZOMBIES
Intern, the producer's assistant who for some reason still listens to him
Hot Girl, a wannabe actress whose main purpose in the film is to have a nice chest
Mechanic, a mechanic and token hispanic guy
Zom-Bait, a guy who's going to die soon
Half an hour in, the real movie has begun. The survivors are trying to get to Arcadia too. It turns out to be a cargo ship anchored in the harbor. The plane only seats two, so they need a plan. Enter Chris, a prisoner who claims to be with the army. He knows a way but wants out of his cage first. Some prisoners played a prank on him and locked him in the cage, and now the survivors don't trust him because he has "the eyes of a killer", and because he's kind of a dick when talking to people. Milla rolls out her ninja toolkit and shows them that she's a killer too! (Incidentally, we will never see these tools again.) Zom-Bait hears noises in the walls but there's nothing there... yet.
The action begins when Milla takes a shower. (Not like that, unfortunately.) A zombie tunnels up from the ground and eats Zom-Bait, who was peeping nearby. Milla and some guitars kill the zombie. The zombies now have tendrils that burst out of their mouths. I think they took this idea from Resident Evil 4, but those were brain parasites, not zombies. Now everyone *really* needs to escape, so they let Chris out to reveal The Plan.
THE PLAN
There's a military personnel carrier that someone borrowed from Left 4 Dead parked in the garage. All they have to do is start it up, drive over the zombies to the beach, then transfer to a boat and set sail for Arcadia.
Mechanic has to cut open the door, which will take time. BUT THEY DON'T HAVE TIME, because a ten foot tall zombie with a giant axe/hammer and a burlap sack over his head starts pounding on the gate. This is definitely ripped from RE4 but makes even less sense because he didn't come from anywhere and there's nobody to give him an axe *or* a sack, but WE DON'T HAVE TIME to worry about this so Chris suggests going to the basement and getting weapons from the huge armory the army left behind. Thanks for not mentioning that before! Milla, Chris, and Hot Girl go for the weapons while Mechanic, Traitor, and Intern open the door. Problem: the basement is flooded. Solution: Hot Girl was a swimming champ! She volunteers to swim to the guns, and the other two go with her -- wait, what?
LOST IN TRANSLATION
By the way, Chris is really Claire's brother. The movie probably would have been better if they were the main characters. The first RE movie made the bizarre choice to create an entirely new main character and we've been stuck with her ever since. RE had two perfectly good action girls (Claire Redfield and Jill Valentine) so there was no reason to add a new one.
Meanwhile, Team B reaches the vehicle and finds that the engine has been removed. Traitor shoots Mechanic because HE IS AN ASSHOLE, then runs off with Intern. Team A holds their breath for over three minutes before they reach a convenient air pocket with the weapons. As they emerge from the water, a zombie grabs Hot Girl and drags her under, then more zombies emerge. Chris and Milla open fire with their SOAKING WET PISTOLS, then lock themselves in with the guns and escape through an air shaft.
Everyone somehow meets up on the roof. Traitor is stealing Milla's two-seat plane and is trying to get Intern to join him. Intern refuses, so Traitor takes off and almost crashes, cutting a bloody swath through the zombies which magically doesn't destroy the plane or propeller. The others are pissed but THEY DON'T HAVE TIME TO BE PISSED because a horde of zombies swarms the roof. Claire tosses Milla a gun in slow motion and everyone and the guitars open fire. They run to the elevator but Milla has a different plan. She runs away from the zombies, stops and shoots for a bit for no reason, then runs again, hurling herself off the roof while clinging to a wire. She throws a bomb to kill the zombies even though they just run off the roof anyway.
At ground level, Milla is surrounded by zombies. Maybe she should have thrown the bomb off the roof instead. She runs through the horde, shooting in slow-motion while the zombies fail to grab her in a very unconvincing way. Token Black Guy closes the door behind her as she runs through.
PLAN B
Go through the zombie tunnels to the sewers, then follow the storm drains to the ocean.
The survivors start to enter the tunnels, but we still have too many cast members so Big Axe Guy bursts into the bathroom and kills Intern. Milla fights him but gets knocked out, so Claire uses super kung fu to beat him back. They shoot him in the head a few times and he goes down. BUT HE'S NOT DONE! With guitars still wailing, he does an over-the-shoulder axe hurl which Milla and Claire limbo under (yes, really). Then they shoot him in the head *again* and it explodes in such a fake-looking way that their special effects guy should have been fired on the spot. We're talking 1980s quality here.
Everyone makes it through the sewers, but right as Token Black Guy is about to drop down to the storm drain he makes the crucial mistake of looking back and gets dragged off by zombies. Oh well. Now we're down to Milla, Claire, and Chris, the real cast members. They take a boat to the Good Ship Arcadia, which is deserted. The ship's log shows all the lifeboats were launched but 2000 passengers are still on board? They find a big clean while room that is definitely not part of a normal cargo ship. It's a cryo-stasis chamber! Claire remembers everything now. Umbrella was picking up survivors and locking them in stasis for experimentation. Why? Who knows? Milla orders all the prisoners released even though they have no source of food or fresh water for 2000 people. One of the prisoners is a character from the previous movie named K-Mart and we're supposed to be happy to see her.
Yes, her name is really K-Mart.
A WORD OF ADVICE
If you ever find two thousand people in cryo-stasis, do the logistics planning *before* you release them. It's okay to think it through. After all, they're not going anywhere.
I keep hoping the movie will end but Milla finds a bloody trail going from an empty chamber to the next room that definitely wasn't there before but I don't think the director realized that. The next room just has some operating tables with emaciated corpses and... big bad Wesker! The T-virus kept Wesker alive but it's trying to take over his body (whatever that means). Milla successfully merged with the virus before so Wesker wants to eat her to get her DNA.
Yes, he really wants to eat her for her DNA. Also, his eyes glow red through his sunglasses because he is evil. Also, he has zombie dogs for pets because he is evil. Also, his zombie dogs have heads that split in half that were totally ripped off from Silent Hill BECAUSE HE IS REALLY REALLY EVIL! Also, Traitor is now working for him and takes Milla's guns because... well, you get the idea. The zombie dogs surround Milla. Enter Chris and Claire, who attack Wesker. Wesker fights back with super teleporting speed that looks like something out of a breakfast cereal ad. Meanwhile, the zombie dogs just stand still for no obvious reason.
THE SOUNDTRACK
I can't describe in words how bad the soundtrack is. I'd say it was algorithmically generated, but no computer could make music this bad. It goes something like this:
Wesker: *throws a punch*
Guitars: *START WAILING FURIOUSLY*
Wesker: *completes his punch and stands still for a second*
Guitars: *stop wailing*
Wesker: *throws another punch*
Guitars: *START WAILING FURIOUSLY AGAIN*
Claire: *says something*
Guitars: *become all subdued and moody*
This happens on a second-by-second basis. It's very distracting.
The siblings are defeated and knocked into cryo-stasis chambers, which slowly sink into the ground. Chris takes a long time to think of shooting the wall but it doesn't work. Now that that's done with, zombie dogs attack! Milla grabs her gun, kills one dog, and kicks a sheet of falling plate glass into the other, cutting it in half. (She lost her superpowers half an hour into the movie, but I think the director forgot about that.) Anyway, she shoots Wesker in the head and releases Chris and Claire. K-Mart saves the day by stopping Traitor from killing Milla.
Wesker's not done (did anyone doubt this?) but Chris and Claire shoot him a lot so he goes down again. They lock Traitor in the room, and as they leave he's yelling "YOU CAN'T DO THIS! I'M A PRODUCER!". Seriously. No human being could ever be this stupid.
Now everyone's okay (aside from the lack of food and water), except -- OH WAIT, WESKER LIVES! He eats Traitor and escapes in a plane, then triggers the self-destruct for the ship BECAUSE HE IS EVIL! (All Umbrella facilities have self-destructs, but this is canon in the games so it's okay.) Unfortunately for him, Milla put the self-destruct bomb in his plane because she knew he would escape instead of just eating them all? I don't know. Anyway, he explodes.
RULE #2: THE DOUBLE-TAP
You could have just set his body on fire, guys. There's no need for these elaborate plans.
Milla decides to make good on the promise of the Arcadia and starts broadcasting the message that it's a safe place for survivors even though they're all going to die of thirst soon. And then comes the only cool moment in the movie. TOKEN BLACK GUY LIVES! He emerges from the sewer victorious, kills a couple zombies just for good measure, and tosses off a sassy one-liner that I forgot. We don't get to see any more of him, though, so I don't know why they brought him back.
Everything's all wrapped up and it's time to end the movie, so dozens of Umbrella plane/helicopter things approach the ship and hover menacingly overhead.
THE END
(Yes, really.)
(I'm not joking. They really did a cliffhanger for this awful piece of dreck.)
(Where did the planes even come from, anyway? Wesker's dead. Who else cares enough to stage a military assault on some of the few fellow human beings left alive?)
(I've heard there's another sequel hook in the credits but if you thought I was going to stick around for the credits you're out of your mind.)