How you have not been spammed, I will never know.transferbodynowSeptember 10 2011, 08:00:06 UTC
[Alright. Well. The giant metal box has now stopped and Yegrinna isn't exactly sure if it's supposed to do that, coming from, you know, an alternate dimension with no technology what so ever.]
[Well, she's unsure of how to react to all this, although she does chuckle at the wonderful schadenfreude, despite the fact she's meant to be destroying humans lives because of all their nonsense. Still, piss is funny. At least to her.]
You may be a despicable human, but at least you're an entertaining one.
Woof? [ SQUINTS AT HER LIKE HE'S TRYING TO READ HER MIND. ]
So I'm no situated in this here predicament with a bloody idiot. Brilliant.
Hipsters are the nunces and assholes who wear the scarves and the stupid little berets and go around yapping about Donald Trump and Churchill or whoever's the latest prime minster or president or whoever.
YOUR MAGIC HAS FAILED, YOU GONNA BE SPAMMED, SONhasnocookiesSeptember 10 2011, 12:37:47 UTC
[Jane's going to be so late to that Mystik Spiral concert at this rate. Not that it really matters, Trent probably won't even notice his little sister's trapped in an elevator with some freaky looking guy. Still, it's a shame she won't be feasting on the delicious eyecandy the occasional attractive Spiral fan provides.]
Well, looks like we're in for a slow and painful death. Anything to say before one of us goes insane and ravages the other?
First base is homicide to you? And people called me strange.
[Eyeroll.]
Don't flatter yourself. Ravage isn't just us jumping into bed and doing it like they do on the Discovery Channel. Ravage also means one of us completely annihilates the other in a fit of psychopathic insanity.
I'm okay with both of those. What's shameful about two consenting adults slaughtering one another? It's a perfectly natural, and might I add beautiful thing.
[Glancing at her watch only proves she's going to miss the concert. Life is good. Wait- no. It's the opposite.]
Regardless, should I snap and non-consensually ravage you before the metal death box releases us, is there anything you'd like to say. I'll start us off; I'm sorry they invented those ugly, blue M&Ms.
[ HE LIKES YOU. That's not necessarily a good thing. ]
Oy oy, it's not as bad as those new white ones. I'll never quite understand the idea of a colorless M&Ms. It's like they just got lazy and couldn't think of anything else like. I don't know, I REMEMBER they used to have these tan ones. Granted, that's not much more interesting than white, but it's certainly something.
Oh oh. And I hate the stupid holiday ones. Like, oh ho, let's suddenly make all of our sweets green and red in commemoration of Valentine's day. I was thinking of perhaps petitioning for a puke-green and diarrhea-brown to commemorate Oktoberbest but what do I know. There's no REAL creativity these days.
I'd sign the petition. The world suffers without such beautiful M&Ms, and Oktoberfest is sadly underrepresented by the candy industry. They need to get their dicks out of Valentine's Day and Christmas and celebrate some realistic holidays.
[She like you, too, Muds. Although, that might not be good, either.]
In fact, lets do away with Valentine's Day all together and replace it with... Satan Day, or something. Sounds much more entertaining than little candy hearts and couples.
Only animal sacrifices? I'm disappointed in you. Why animals when there's plenty of busty blondes just begging to be sacrificed to a higher power?
[She's amazed he hasn't had some kind of overdose from all the sarcasm. Although, watching Brittany get knifed in a Satanic ritual would be pretty funny.]
Here I was, hoping I'd found a like-minded person. Oh, well. I'll just murder all the aforementioned porn stars, myself.
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...What is it doing?
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Wait. She's serious. And... rather observant. He's too hung over to have noticed. ]
Shit. My agent's going to stick his fiery fist up my arse if I don't show.
[ PAUSES. Smiles. And totally doesn't answer her question. ]
Brilliant. He's a wanker anyway. Nothing like pissing in his cereal.
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You may be a despicable human, but at least you're an entertaining one.
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HEY she's kind of cute. Maybe he'll try turning his charm on.
He scratches one bloodshot eye, digesting the situation. ]
So you're one of those angst-riddled hipsters now, yeah?
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[Damn you humans and all your foreign words! Learn to talk her her, damn it.]
What's that? Some kind of food? As for angst, I quite enjoy my life, woof.
[Because ice-cream is totally something worth living for. That and her les yay with that wheelchair girl.]
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So I'm no situated in this here predicament with a bloody idiot. Brilliant.
Hipsters are the nunces and assholes who wear the scarves and the stupid little berets and go around yapping about Donald Trump and Churchill or whoever's the latest prime minster or president or whoever.
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Well, looks like we're in for a slow and painful death. Anything to say before one of us goes insane and ravages the other?
[Yep, she's bored. Someone entertain her!]
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Woah, woah, woah. Oy. We aren't even on first names yet. Jumping right to first base, just like that!
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[Eyeroll.]
Don't flatter yourself. Ravage isn't just us jumping into bed and doing it like they do on the Discovery Channel. Ravage also means one of us completely annihilates the other in a fit of psychopathic insanity.
But, enough about my art collection, how are you?
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[Glancing at her watch only proves she's going to miss the concert. Life is good. Wait- no. It's the opposite.]
Regardless, should I snap and non-consensually ravage you before the metal death box releases us, is there anything you'd like to say. I'll start us off; I'm sorry they invented those ugly, blue M&Ms.
Reply
Oy oy, it's not as bad as those new white ones. I'll never quite understand the idea of a colorless M&Ms. It's like they just got lazy and couldn't think of anything else like. I don't know, I REMEMBER they used to have these tan ones. Granted, that's not much more interesting than white, but it's certainly something.
Oh oh. And I hate the stupid holiday ones. Like, oh ho, let's suddenly make all of our sweets green and red in commemoration of Valentine's day. I was thinking of perhaps petitioning for a puke-green and diarrhea-brown to commemorate Oktoberbest but what do I know. There's no REAL creativity these days.
Reply
[She like you, too, Muds. Although, that might not be good, either.]
In fact, lets do away with Valentine's Day all together and replace it with... Satan Day, or something. Sounds much more entertaining than little candy hearts and couples.
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[ Taps his chin thoughtfully. There's a delighted gleam in his eye, ngl. ]
It'll be fantastic. Let's nix the sweets. Instead, weekly--no--daily animal sacrifices required. Discounts on livestock all around!
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[She's amazed he hasn't had some kind of overdose from all the sarcasm. Although, watching Brittany get knifed in a Satanic ritual would be pretty funny.]
Here I was, hoping I'd found a like-minded person. Oh, well. I'll just murder all the aforementioned porn stars, myself.
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