The next reply was delayed, the end of the message registering that he'd made John come in his workplace; he'd turned John from a functioning member of society into a horny man that needed to hide in a bathroom to jerk off in the middle of the day, and Lucien was going to replay that knowledge over and over in his head for days to come. He was going to picture it, imagine John as completely insatiable and trying to hide his rock hard prick behind folders and under his desk, (a big, old oak desk), as he was forced to get through his patients and snatch a dirty moment alone.
For now though, he concentrated on the thought of John, there with him. Pinning him against the seat as he bent over him and drilled him hard. His voice, the growl that his soft voice took on, telling him that he was allowed to come now, just for him. Only John.
"... John..."
Afterwards, Lucien slouched sideways in the seat, pleasantly sated and not willing to come back to the real world as his heart rate slowed down and he caught his breath. Eventually, he stirred, wiped his hand on the leg of his jogging bottoms and lifted his phone to type.
Fuck. That was amazing. Hope no one heard you. Kinda craving a cuddle now...
By the time John received Lucien's reply, he had washed his hands, gotten himself together and returned to his office. He was in the middle of another patient appointment when he could feel the soft vibration of his mobile in his trousers. God, this consultation couldn't pass quickly enough, he wanted to read what Lucien had written, wanted to know if he'd come, if his climax had been as intense as his own...
Getting to read the text once his patient had left was intensely satisfying, and it left John feeling warm all over. He felt quite the same, imagined being able to hold Lucien in his arms after the both of them had fallen apart, spent by their intense coupling. He would brush Lucien's damp hair away from his forehead and kiss the salty skin there, brush his lips down the other's jawline until he could catch his lips in a slow, lazy kiss.
You'll get your cuddle. Promise. Want it too. Hold you close, fall asleep with you in my arms.
John exhaled slowly as he hit the send button. Why did those words seem so much more revealing than any of the dirty ones had been?
The cat had come over to see Lucien by the time the text came through - good old Zirconia had enough sense to stay out of the way until after Lucien had had his fun at least. Lucien was sprawling out on his side, stroking the purring cat and not particularly watching what was happening on the TV in front of him. It was almost perfect, only lacking the warmth of another human body pressed against his back, he'd decided, arms wrapped loosely around him as they basked in the afterglow together.
As soon as the text arrived he reached out for his phone, a smile spread over his face and a fuzzy feeling started in his stomach.
That sounds perfect. I wish I could be with you right now. He hesitated, typed a kiss, then shook his head to himself and deleted it again before hitting send.
For long minutes, John simply sat in his chair, staring down at his phone, reading the mesage over and over, fingertip sliding over the screen if the backlight threathened to go out. Truth was, he wanted to be with Lucien just as much. Not just in this moment. But every single moment since the man had returned to Leeds. The thought of seeing him again filled with him such excitement, anticipation, joy, impatience, frustration... It couldn't happen soon enough. John had already caught on that this had rapidly turned into more than a bar hook-up, but it seemed, while he wasn't looking, that it had reached an entirely new level. One that made his heart jump in his chest and his mind grind to a halt.
Was he actually falling for this man? Falling for a man, at that. A very gay man, who had 'playful' and 'commitment issues' written all over him, and John would know, because he had issues of himself in that area. Still, he couldn't deny what he was feeling, much as he wished he could, much as it confused him.
I could come up. To Leeds. Depending on what your work schedule looks like.
There. John sat back in his chair with a slow breath. He was interested enough in Lucien to take the train up north and visit Lucien on his turf, placing himself out of his comfort zone, his city. Question was, would Lucien accept him in his daily surroundings? Was he more than a London-based fuck buddy arrangement?
Alarm bells should have been ringing, and in truth, they were. This was more than Lucien being the one to drag some poor repressed doctor out of the closet and now he wants to explore; John wasn't stupid, he knew if he wanted to try out the scene he was already living in the best city in the country to do that. This wasn't a couple of quick and convenient holiday shags and some fun phone-sex after for Lucien either. This was actually going out of each other's ways to travel all the way up the country and to give up a weekend off to entertain someone. This was figuring out exactly what to do with Lucien's brother to get him out of the house for a couple of days. This was a lot of trouble for just a shag.
The alarm bells were ringing. And Lucien was ignoring them.
I'd like that. First weekend I get off. I'll email you as soon as I know when. Can't come soon enough.
Maybe he could even swap shifts with someone. Fuck. He needed to see John again so badly, fuck the alarm bells.
The feeling of relief was heady, to say the least. The feelings of dread and anxiety that followed right after were expected by now, and so John pressed them down just as quickly as they surfaced. Later. He would deal with those later. Not the right time for an identity crisis, or a sexuality crisis, or even a relationship crisis. This wasn't that. Yet. It might well be soon, if things continued on like this. But it would do not good, no good at all, to rush on ahead and sabotage anything when it was going so well, so far. And it had been. It all been happening very fast, certainly that, but throughout it all, it had felt natural. And good. Really bloody good.
Great. I'll ring you up tonight, after work. If you like.
After all that, John felt an intense need to hear the other man's voice, if just for a short while. By now, he knew it would lift his spirits, and calm him down, which was just what he needed right now. Because this? This was fucking terrifying.
That... that made Lucien more nervous than he could have possibly anticipated. It actually surprised him, as he'd never had any worries about talking on a phone before. But, this was casual, this was an offer to chat, with no build up to sex of any kind. Not immediately anyway. He wanted to hear John's voice so badly, to just talk to him and reestablish the easy connection that they had between each other. They hadn't struggled to find things to talk about in the past, but suddenly Lucien was nervous, what if this time they did? It'd be so much clearer over the phone if it was awkward, and he didn't want to stumble, not right now, not when something new and interesting was forming here, something that he wanted so badly.
Yeah. That'd be great. It'll be good to hear your voice.
For the rest of the afternoon and early evening, John found himself swamped with patient appointments and updating files on the computer. Feeling just somewhat guilty for earlier that day, he wanted to make sure he got everything done, plus a few extra tasks that had been piling on his desk. It was tedious, and took longer than usual, his mind filled with images of Lucien, the sound of his voice, his laughter, the sparkle in those gorgeous eyes. Oh, but he was fucked, and he knew it. At least it seemed like the other man felt just as confused. And he hadn't disappeared yet, had responded positively to everything so far. Maybe... Maybe this could actually turn into something, something good, something for just John. God, he wanted that, so much.
Leaving the surgery, John decided to do some shopping on the way home. Chances were they'd run low on milk again, and he wasn't entirely sure there was anything that could be identified as edible in their fridge, either. He had planned to call Lucien as soon as he was home, but found his fingers positively itching as he walked down the street. He could wait no longer; his stomach was in knots and his heart was practically leaping out of his chest with the desire and need to hear Lucien's voice again. Fishing his mobile out of his pocket, John found Lucien's contact with practiced ease (the amount of times he had simply stared at it, debating whether he should call, was bordering on pathetic by now). Hearing Lucien pick up on the other end brought an immediate smile to his face, something that shaded his own voice as he spoke.
"Hey John," Lucien replied with a natural smile on his face, his tone instantly warm as he felt his whole body tingle just from a few simple words from John. It was a nice feeling, unsettling and still unexpected, even though he hadn't been able to get the man off his mind since they'd met, but one that he didn't want to give up just yet.
"Yeah, it's fine. It's good to hear your voice," he found himself spilling out as he settled on the sofa, tucking his feet under himself comfortably. He felt like a teenage girl, getting a call from their crush. He'd spent most of the afternoon trying to think of things that he could talk about, things he could ask John if the conversation dried up. He'd probably over thought it far too much by now, but he didn't want to risk an awkward silence. He wanted them to keep this connection they had here. "How was your day, huh?" There was a playful tone in Lucien's voice, the words rolling with his accent.
John smiled as he crossed the street; doubtlessly, Lucien would be able to hear the hustle and bustle of London life in the background as they spoke. It would be a little better as soon as John entered the store, which wasn't that far removed from the surgery.
"You know bloody well how my day was, you cheeky bastard," he accused the other man, fondness practically dripping from his voice. God, he missed him, so much. Lucien had a way of lifting his spirits that was almost addictive. "I trust yours was as enjoyable?" Truthfully, the only part that had been enjoyable had been the thoroughly unexpected sexting and quick but mind-blowing wank that followed... but that had certainly turned the day from alright into brilliant.
"Can't wait to come and visit you," he continued, voice a little quieter now, more intimate. "Feels like forever since you left London." And it really had not been that long at all. Christ, this situation...
The mild curse words, so very British, just made his smile grow. Somehow they felt affectionate, intimate in their playfulness. Lucien took them as a sign of how comfortable John felt with him. Somehow, even though his voice was all he could hear, Lucien felt like he was in the doctor's presence and he was extremely comfortable in it. He imagined that John was here with him on the sofa now, a cozy body that he could sprawl against while they chatted lazily.
"I've been enjoying the last of my freedom, indulging myself." He drew the words out with a smirk. "There was some excitement earlier though."
Ah, there it was, that feeling of exhilaration and anticipation just to hear that John was feeling the same as him. His heart beat a little faster in his chest. "I know. I can't believe how much I want to see you again already." He admitted. He'd already bared himself to John, but each time he reinforced it, it still felt raw and a little overwhelming. "Is there anything you want to do while you're here? Apart from the obvious. I mean... I have no problem with spending a weekend in bed, but I can make plans if you want to go out, or stay in, or whatever..." Fuck. Shut up, Lucien.
It was perfectly endearing, the way Lucien went on and on and on, and John was smiling like a loon by the time he entered the shop. He wished there was a way for him to reach through the phone with his hand so he could brush his knuckles down the other man's cheek and wait for him to shut up already.
"Lucien," he eventually interruped, voice warm and low with amusement, the shadow of desire present underneath it all. "Honestly, I don't care. I'm coming up for you, not for Leeds. If you have places you want to show me, we can do that. Things you want to do, plans you want to make, I'll be there. As long as it involves spending time with you, I'll be well pleased, I promise you."
John took his time walking through the shop, annoying more than few people who were thoroughly displeased with John's apparent lack for the rules of shopping after work. He knew he wasn't doing it nearly fast or efficient enough, but he didn't care; he was in no hurry, looking at and picking up products in an almost lazy manner.
"The weekend in bed idea sounds promising, though," he murmured, finding it very easy indeed to imagine in his head. "Tell me more about that. So I can... consider it properly."
"No, no one comes up for Leeds..." He shook his head, the humor clear in his voice. Zirconia had returned to the seat again, probably hearing Lucien's voice and assuming that he was talking to him. It was a perfectly reasonable assumption for a cat to make. He stroked him and found that he quite strongly wanted to introduce John to him. He knew what that made him; one of those crazy people that think that their pets are part of the family. But they are: Love me, love my cat.
... Or... Like me enough to want to take train up to Leeds just to see me again, don't push him off when my cat tries to sit on you. It didn't have quite the same ring to it, but at least it didn't use the "L" word.
"Where are you?" He tilted his head and tried to make out the background noise. He wasn't at home, that much was clear. "If you're in public I'm not sure I should be telling you about how I'm going to let you fuck me."
Ah, and there it was, the now familiar slow burn of desire and fondness John could only identify as Lucien. He continued to make his way through the shop, rather randomly selecting things to put in his basket; that would be an interesting discovery back at home. For now, his attention was focused solely on the voice on the other end of the line. Anyone who bothered to break out of their own bubble and look at John would see him smile, and know what that smile meant. And envy him for it. God, it had been a while since he'd felt like this, about anyone. It was thrilling. And those images now running through his mind, him fucking Lucien... Yes, please. Don't mind if I do.
"Shopping for groceries," he answered, trying for casual but knowing Lucien would be able to pick up on the undertones in his voice, the desire there, the anticipation, the impatience, frustration, pure undeniable want... "Tell me anyway," he ordered, voice low and dark and full of promises. "Not like anyone can hear you. Just me." Fuck, but this was stupidly exciting. He glanced around quickly, wondering if anyone had caught on to what was happening. Everybody seemed perfectly concerned with themselves. Even so, the fact that this was a very public place, and John was effectively talking about getting to fuck his... His what, really? His gay friend with definite benefits? Very male fuck buddy? Boyfriend? God, no... Was he? Would John like him to be? Shit. Whatever, his Lucien, yes, that was a fine enough definition, for now...
"You called me while you were shopping?" He didn't really know what to make of that. It was... Well, it was spontaneous, wasn't it? Even though he'd arranged to call him this evening, the fact that he was in the middle of Tesco, or wherever, and was talking to him on the phone, asking him to tell him about what he wanted John to do to him in bed, it was giving in to so many urges. Wasn't it? God, Lucien wasn't even sure what to think, maybe he was trying to read too much into it, but he'd really expected a post-dinner call from the comfort of his living room, or maybe bedroom. Something that took some building up and preparing for, a glass of Dutch courage. Calling whilst shopping was something you did with people you were close to. Family, good friends. Lovers.
Hmm... Maybe he was reading too much into it. Just because that was what he would have done, it didn't mean that John thought the same way as him. He was probably thinking completely differently, hoping for a good distraction while he picked up a loaf of bread. Lucien could do that at least. It took very little imagination, because he'd already thought about enough since getting home: "I'm going to let you take me, John. I'm going to lay naked on my bed and beckon you to me. Every inch of my body is for you to touch while I plead with you for more, for your tongue and lips, for your cock." His voice is a rough stream of words, the slight rush to them betraying how much he really needs this. "I need to feel you in me, filling me."
... Perhaps he had not thought this through. John inhaled sharply at the image Lucien was painting with his words. Coupled with that damnable voice, the experience was instantly and unbearably erotic. Heat pooled in his stomach, deliciously low, and John cursed himself for not being able to wait thirty minutes more, to call Lucien from the privacy of his own bedroom, instead of in the middle of a very crowded shop. But Sherlock was at home, and somehow, that was worse. Astoundingly observant flatmate, versus a space full of strangers who did not care either way... Yes, this was better. Aside from the fact that he could not touch himself, or freely speak his mind, and oh, the things he wanted to say...
Clearing his throat, he looked around, a quick scan to determine how many people surrounded him, how close they were standing, how distracted they were by groceries and phone calls of their own. "Yeah," he murmured, his voice already rough at the edges, "I need it, too. So much." He sighed, deeply. "Lucien..." God, this was torture. Getting to hear the other man's voice, hear his need, the breathy quality of his words, and there was nothing he could do but grip his hand around his mobile. Curse the thing, it wasn't enough, not nearly. "Christ, I miss you. Do you miss me? Tell me."
For now though, he concentrated on the thought of John, there with him. Pinning him against the seat as he bent over him and drilled him hard. His voice, the growl that his soft voice took on, telling him that he was allowed to come now, just for him. Only John.
"... John..."
Afterwards, Lucien slouched sideways in the seat, pleasantly sated and not willing to come back to the real world as his heart rate slowed down and he caught his breath. Eventually, he stirred, wiped his hand on the leg of his jogging bottoms and lifted his phone to type.
Fuck. That was amazing. Hope no one heard you. Kinda craving a cuddle now...
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Getting to read the text once his patient had left was intensely satisfying, and it left John feeling warm all over. He felt quite the same, imagined being able to hold Lucien in his arms after the both of them had fallen apart, spent by their intense coupling. He would brush Lucien's damp hair away from his forehead and kiss the salty skin there, brush his lips down the other's jawline until he could catch his lips in a slow, lazy kiss.
You'll get your cuddle. Promise. Want it too. Hold you close, fall asleep with you in my arms.
John exhaled slowly as he hit the send button. Why did those words seem so much more revealing than any of the dirty ones had been?
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As soon as the text arrived he reached out for his phone, a smile spread over his face and a fuzzy feeling started in his stomach.
That sounds perfect. I wish I could be with you right now. He hesitated, typed a kiss, then shook his head to himself and deleted it again before hitting send.
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Was he actually falling for this man? Falling for a man, at that. A very gay man, who had 'playful' and 'commitment issues' written all over him, and John would know, because he had issues of himself in that area. Still, he couldn't deny what he was feeling, much as he wished he could, much as it confused him.
I could come up. To Leeds. Depending on what your work schedule looks like.
There. John sat back in his chair with a slow breath. He was interested enough in Lucien to take the train up north and visit Lucien on his turf, placing himself out of his comfort zone, his city. Question was, would Lucien accept him in his daily surroundings? Was he more than a London-based fuck buddy arrangement?
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The alarm bells were ringing. And Lucien was ignoring them.
I'd like that. First weekend I get off. I'll email you as soon as I know when. Can't come soon enough.
Maybe he could even swap shifts with someone. Fuck. He needed to see John again so badly, fuck the alarm bells.
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Great. I'll ring you up tonight, after work. If you like.
After all that, John felt an intense need to hear the other man's voice, if just for a short while. By now, he knew it would lift his spirits, and calm him down, which was just what he needed right now. Because this? This was fucking terrifying.
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Yeah. That'd be great. It'll be good to hear your voice.
Letting out a deep breath, Lucien hit send.
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For the rest of the afternoon and early evening, John found himself swamped with patient appointments and updating files on the computer. Feeling just somewhat guilty for earlier that day, he wanted to make sure he got everything done, plus a few extra tasks that had been piling on his desk. It was tedious, and took longer than usual, his mind filled with images of Lucien, the sound of his voice, his laughter, the sparkle in those gorgeous eyes. Oh, but he was fucked, and he knew it. At least it seemed like the other man felt just as confused. And he hadn't disappeared yet, had responded positively to everything so far. Maybe... Maybe this could actually turn into something, something good, something for just John. God, he wanted that, so much.
Leaving the surgery, John decided to do some shopping on the way home. Chances were they'd run low on milk again, and he wasn't entirely sure there was anything that could be identified as edible in their fridge, either. He had planned to call Lucien as soon as he was home, but found his fingers positively itching as he walked down the street. He could wait no longer; his stomach was in knots and his heart was practically leaping out of his chest with the desire and need to hear Lucien's voice again. Fishing his mobile out of his pocket, John found Lucien's contact with practiced ease (the amount of times he had simply stared at it, debating whether he should call, was bordering on pathetic by now). Hearing Lucien pick up on the other end brought an immediate smile to his face, something that shaded his own voice as he spoke.
"Hey. It's John. Is this a good time?"
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"Yeah, it's fine. It's good to hear your voice," he found himself spilling out as he settled on the sofa, tucking his feet under himself comfortably. He felt like a teenage girl, getting a call from their crush. He'd spent most of the afternoon trying to think of things that he could talk about, things he could ask John if the conversation dried up. He'd probably over thought it far too much by now, but he didn't want to risk an awkward silence. He wanted them to keep this connection they had here. "How was your day, huh?" There was a playful tone in Lucien's voice, the words rolling with his accent.
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"You know bloody well how my day was, you cheeky bastard," he accused the other man, fondness practically dripping from his voice. God, he missed him, so much. Lucien had a way of lifting his spirits that was almost addictive. "I trust yours was as enjoyable?" Truthfully, the only part that had been enjoyable had been the thoroughly unexpected sexting and quick but mind-blowing wank that followed... but that had certainly turned the day from alright into brilliant.
"Can't wait to come and visit you," he continued, voice a little quieter now, more intimate. "Feels like forever since you left London." And it really had not been that long at all. Christ, this situation...
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"I've been enjoying the last of my freedom, indulging myself." He drew the words out with a smirk. "There was some excitement earlier though."
Ah, there it was, that feeling of exhilaration and anticipation just to hear that John was feeling the same as him. His heart beat a little faster in his chest. "I know. I can't believe how much I want to see you again already." He admitted. He'd already bared himself to John, but each time he reinforced it, it still felt raw and a little overwhelming. "Is there anything you want to do while you're here? Apart from the obvious. I mean... I have no problem with spending a weekend in bed, but I can make plans if you want to go out, or stay in, or whatever..." Fuck. Shut up, Lucien.
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"Lucien," he eventually interruped, voice warm and low with amusement, the shadow of desire present underneath it all. "Honestly, I don't care. I'm coming up for you, not for Leeds. If you have places you want to show me, we can do that. Things you want to do, plans you want to make, I'll be there. As long as it involves spending time with you, I'll be well pleased, I promise you."
John took his time walking through the shop, annoying more than few people who were thoroughly displeased with John's apparent lack for the rules of shopping after work. He knew he wasn't doing it nearly fast or efficient enough, but he didn't care; he was in no hurry, looking at and picking up products in an almost lazy manner.
"The weekend in bed idea sounds promising, though," he murmured, finding it very easy indeed to imagine in his head. "Tell me more about that. So I can... consider it properly."
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... Or... Like me enough to want to take train up to Leeds just to see me again, don't push him off when my cat tries to sit on you. It didn't have quite the same ring to it, but at least it didn't use the "L" word.
"Where are you?" He tilted his head and tried to make out the background noise. He wasn't at home, that much was clear. "If you're in public I'm not sure I should be telling you about how I'm going to let you fuck me."
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"Shopping for groceries," he answered, trying for casual but knowing Lucien would be able to pick up on the undertones in his voice, the desire there, the anticipation, the impatience, frustration, pure undeniable want... "Tell me anyway," he ordered, voice low and dark and full of promises. "Not like anyone can hear you. Just me." Fuck, but this was stupidly exciting. He glanced around quickly, wondering if anyone had caught on to what was happening. Everybody seemed perfectly concerned with themselves. Even so, the fact that this was a very public place, and John was effectively talking about getting to fuck his... His what, really? His gay friend with definite benefits? Very male fuck buddy? Boyfriend? God, no... Was he? Would John like him to be? Shit. Whatever, his Lucien, yes, that was a fine enough definition, for now...
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Hmm... Maybe he was reading too much into it. Just because that was what he would have done, it didn't mean that John thought the same way as him. He was probably thinking completely differently, hoping for a good distraction while he picked up a loaf of bread. Lucien could do that at least. It took very little imagination, because he'd already thought about enough since getting home: "I'm going to let you take me, John. I'm going to lay naked on my bed and beckon you to me. Every inch of my body is for you to touch while I plead with you for more, for your tongue and lips, for your cock." His voice is a rough stream of words, the slight rush to them betraying how much he really needs this. "I need to feel you in me, filling me."
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Clearing his throat, he looked around, a quick scan to determine how many people surrounded him, how close they were standing, how distracted they were by groceries and phone calls of their own. "Yeah," he murmured, his voice already rough at the edges, "I need it, too. So much." He sighed, deeply. "Lucien..." God, this was torture. Getting to hear the other man's voice, hear his need, the breathy quality of his words, and there was nothing he could do but grip his hand around his mobile. Curse the thing, it wasn't enough, not nearly. "Christ, I miss you. Do you miss me? Tell me."
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