(no subject)
SO MUCH IS GOING ON. But yet...it isn't. I don't know.
I just feel very determined to write here.
I thought the job I wanted was a bust - but apparently I might still have a shot. So I'm currently tripping about that a little. For the past five days I have assumed I wasn't going to get it. And I still might not. I'm not too sure. When I thought it was a total loss I kept thinking about what I would do instead. When I originally applied for it I did it offhand - more concerned about just being back with family - and figured as soon as I was done with that I would go back to Boston. The job I want is much more permanent. I'm more so scared to not get the job because I feel if I didn't it would reflect on my character. I'm insanely qualified. It would mean that maybe I was too arrogant. Which...I could see. I dunno. Still hoping. I hope to hear something by the end of the day.
I'm having a lot of...normal insane not so typical very typical Mel thoughts. Ha. I don't think I have any more "What If's" in my life...that is for sure. Except Boston. But damn that won't be a What If. It won't be. I'm going to make that happen.
I just feel very determined to write here.
I thought the job I wanted was a bust - but apparently I might still have a shot. So I'm currently tripping about that a little. For the past five days I have assumed I wasn't going to get it. And I still might not. I'm not too sure. When I thought it was a total loss I kept thinking about what I would do instead. When I originally applied for it I did it offhand - more concerned about just being back with family - and figured as soon as I was done with that I would go back to Boston. The job I want is much more permanent. I'm more so scared to not get the job because I feel if I didn't it would reflect on my character. I'm insanely qualified. It would mean that maybe I was too arrogant. Which...I could see. I dunno. Still hoping. I hope to hear something by the end of the day.
I'm having a lot of...normal insane not so typical very typical Mel thoughts. Ha. I don't think I have any more "What If's" in my life...that is for sure. Except Boston. But damn that won't be a What If. It won't be. I'm going to make that happen.