SuperStar
UCAUTIONIN THE INTEREST OF SAFETY IT IS ADVISABLE TO KEEP MELODIOUS04 AWAY FROM FIRE AND FLAMES.
From Go-Quiz.com
... yeah... my weave might catch on fire :/...
anyway...
I just came from the Fox! The Wes and I saw Jesus Christ Super Star and it was pretty good, although CJ was a MUCH better Herod than the broadway dude :). In fact, I saw CJ and Annette at the Fox too. That was pretty cool...
Apparently Allyson is having an Alto Sax party on Saturday. That's so nice of her :). I hope it will be fun and that people will still come, considering that it's memorial day weekend.. isn't it? hrm...
But back to they play... anything having to do with Christ always helps me to re-evaluate my relationship with Him. Recently, I've been less involved in my spiritual growth. My church has changed so much. I've changed so much. I hope that I can get back on track though.
I always hear people talk about how they "know they are going to heaven" and I've always been jealous of that fact. I love God. I love Christ. But He can do whatever He wants with my soul. I always find myself doubting my goodness. Am I doing enough? How could I possibly be making Him happy? If the rapture came tomorrow, why would He want to take me? I hope to some day find the answer to these questions. I want to be able to look at my life and immediately know that I'm doing the right thing in His eyes...
I understand what the writer of Jesus Christ Super star was trying to portray through Judas. Judas was so concerned with being "good" that he started to question and criticize the sole epitome of "goodness" and in turn began to despise Christ. I do it every day. I try hard to be a person that I have no problem seeing in the mirror, but then cynicism takes over. I judge people but dismiss it as trying to "understand" the person. I am suspicious when others are kind to me. I analyze and pull apart aspects of my life until the "goodness" can't exist. I realize this... and now I will fix it.
It's just another step toward my ultimate goal of acceptance I suppose. Tomorrow I think I'll wake up and pray like I used to... before my church changed and I started to not like it. I'll try to eliminate the excuses I make for my spiritual weaknesses...
... who knows...
...maybe a little more faith is all I need.