geez its been a while.............
well it has definitely been a long time since i have written anthing in here................... well a lot has been happening to me through this time.....
my dad................ well he definitely doesnt kno how to keep promises........ especially the ones that really count........... really long story... dont feel like typing it all out right at the moment..............
my family in general........ SUCKS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! no one knos how to talk, listen, or just get along with one another..... and honestly i dont need more than half of this shit...............
me................... well no 16 year old should have to do pretty much anything i have to do on a day to day basis.............. lets see.... well i am the only one who is ever home at my house... granted when we are all sleeping... but i mean in the day time..... i mean i cook. i clean. i do the laundry (for everyone). No one ever acknoweledges anything i do for them............ no 16 year old should have this much stress looming over their shoulders until they have their own family and their own house and shit...... i am just getting to the point where i cant take it anymore.........
me on a better day................ i have a bf...... well...... ill find out if we are staying together tomorrow.... i dunno... i love him................. and he knows it... and i kno he loves me..... but he wants to end it all over some stupid shit... so we are going to work it out tomorrow.....
(yeah that was a better day)
i dont even have good days anymore... i guess i am not allowed to or something.... right now i feel like i shouldnt even exist..... but that is just my opinion right now...... i will prolly kno different by tomorrow... (hopefully)
but yeah i kinda forgot how much journals help at times...... but i feel a lil better now so yeah i am gonna go for now so my mood doesnt get wrecked for the moment... i guess i will write the next time i remember this thing... (my LJ i mean) but yeah ttyl
always,
Melanie
I.
Looking in the window
Mother and daughter talking
Being civil for once
II.
The person glimpsing
In the window is gone,
The fighting starts
Right up agian
III.
Seeing the youngest daughter
In the kitchen doing
Her mother's job of cooking
IV.
Watching the father
Who doesn't know
What went wrong
V.
The sight of the sister
Who never
Respects what she has
VI.
Peeping, nosy neighbors
Who don't know what to do
VII.
the imperceptible life
They have always
Longed for will probably
Never happen
VIII.
The guise of each
Family member different
In many ways
IX.
Visualizing what
life could be like
Without all of the fighting
X.
The youngest daughter
Leering in the corner
Wondering what will
Happen next
XI.
The mother staring
Into the computer
Screen thinking she
Did nothing wrong
XII.
The father visioning
A life after divorce
XIII.
The mother and sister
Envisioning that the
Youngest was never born.......
everything in this poem is true... honestly
my dad................ well he definitely doesnt kno how to keep promises........ especially the ones that really count........... really long story... dont feel like typing it all out right at the moment..............
my family in general........ SUCKS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! no one knos how to talk, listen, or just get along with one another..... and honestly i dont need more than half of this shit...............
me................... well no 16 year old should have to do pretty much anything i have to do on a day to day basis.............. lets see.... well i am the only one who is ever home at my house... granted when we are all sleeping... but i mean in the day time..... i mean i cook. i clean. i do the laundry (for everyone). No one ever acknoweledges anything i do for them............ no 16 year old should have this much stress looming over their shoulders until they have their own family and their own house and shit...... i am just getting to the point where i cant take it anymore.........
me on a better day................ i have a bf...... well...... ill find out if we are staying together tomorrow.... i dunno... i love him................. and he knows it... and i kno he loves me..... but he wants to end it all over some stupid shit... so we are going to work it out tomorrow.....
(yeah that was a better day)
i dont even have good days anymore... i guess i am not allowed to or something.... right now i feel like i shouldnt even exist..... but that is just my opinion right now...... i will prolly kno different by tomorrow... (hopefully)
but yeah i kinda forgot how much journals help at times...... but i feel a lil better now so yeah i am gonna go for now so my mood doesnt get wrecked for the moment... i guess i will write the next time i remember this thing... (my LJ i mean) but yeah ttyl
always,
Melanie
I.
Looking in the window
Mother and daughter talking
Being civil for once
II.
The person glimpsing
In the window is gone,
The fighting starts
Right up agian
III.
Seeing the youngest daughter
In the kitchen doing
Her mother's job of cooking
IV.
Watching the father
Who doesn't know
What went wrong
V.
The sight of the sister
Who never
Respects what she has
VI.
Peeping, nosy neighbors
Who don't know what to do
VII.
the imperceptible life
They have always
Longed for will probably
Never happen
VIII.
The guise of each
Family member different
In many ways
IX.
Visualizing what
life could be like
Without all of the fighting
X.
The youngest daughter
Leering in the corner
Wondering what will
Happen next
XI.
The mother staring
Into the computer
Screen thinking she
Did nothing wrong
XII.
The father visioning
A life after divorce
XIII.
The mother and sister
Envisioning that the
Youngest was never born.......
everything in this poem is true... honestly