(no subject)
Eff, I thought I had pop-up blocker. Eff, eff eff.
I think I'm getting sick.
The last few days when the past has been either tossed my way, or brought on by myself... I realized how much I like natural order. If something is meant to happen, it does...and if that means we're not friends anymore, or I forgot that you existed, then that is how things are supposed to be. I dont like being grabbed and jolted and brought back into someones life that I dont even know anymore. Its fustrating, its overwhelming... you have to start from scratch again. I didnt spend 8 years of my life building a friendship to lose it and then have to start again. That is NOT what I intended. You lied straight to my face too, that is not what I bargained for. I don't know if I can revive that...I dont know anything anymore.
I'm angry, I'm starting to hate a lot of things, and I just want to sleep all day. And gummi worms. Sour gummi worms.
I think I'm getting sick.
The last few days when the past has been either tossed my way, or brought on by myself... I realized how much I like natural order. If something is meant to happen, it does...and if that means we're not friends anymore, or I forgot that you existed, then that is how things are supposed to be. I dont like being grabbed and jolted and brought back into someones life that I dont even know anymore. Its fustrating, its overwhelming... you have to start from scratch again. I didnt spend 8 years of my life building a friendship to lose it and then have to start again. That is NOT what I intended. You lied straight to my face too, that is not what I bargained for. I don't know if I can revive that...I dont know anything anymore.
I'm angry, I'm starting to hate a lot of things, and I just want to sleep all day. And gummi worms. Sour gummi worms.