pieces of me.

[melissafairy19]

Life as I know it these days is not as fulfilling as I had hoped. I had hoped that when i graduated that I would receive my dream job, get paid lots of money and move away to start new. Nope. No such luck. Instead I still live at home with the rents, working at a job that I would probably like better if it made me happy.

My job doesnt make me happy. Surprise. Living at home isn't so bad, but i would prefer living with Blair. Thats another thing that scares me. If I move away to find my dream job, I want blair to come with me. Our friendship and closeness is everything that I have ever wanted in a friend. She gets me. I get her, mostly because we pretty much have the same mind.

I don't know what I want from my life right now. I just know that I have been terribly unhappy as of late, crying a lot, when only a few months ago I couldn't even remember the last time I had cried. I just need something new. Something fresh. Something fulfilling. I don't have that in my life except in my family, and in a few select friends. I just want to feel something other than this. Something other than this emptiness that I feel because my life has too many holes in it.

I guess I just have to fill it one hole at a time and then one day, hopefully sooner than later, I will feel complete.