Comments | melissa_42: [fic] Without a trace

melissa_42

[fic] Without a trace

Jun 23, 2010 20:12

Title: Without a trace
Pairing: Tsuna/Enma
Rating: PG
Prompt: *-punkmeme: biopunk; Tsuna/Enma; “Not even footprints will be left behind.”
Word Count: 546
Disclaimer: Katekyo Hitman Reborn belongs to Amano Akira.
Summary: This was the price to pay for their safety.

( Three days passed between the first offer and Tsuna’s final decision. )

*-punk, proud citizen of the procrasti-nation, p: 2700/0027, f: katekyo hitman reborn!, c: sawada tsunayoshi, fanfic, c: kozato enma

Comments 15

makeste June 23 2010, 19:40:52 UTC

I am so torn between "NOOOOO TSUNAAA" and "b-but at least Yamamoto didn't get ripped in half and Tsuna and Enma got to continue their wonderful shota romance" right now. XD

This was so good, though, and I say that in spite of my kneejerk "DON'T SPLIT UP TSUNA FROM HIS GAY MAFIA FAMILY" reaction. You wrote it very well; Tsuna was very IC and his grief at having to leave everything behind hit me hard. "He hadn't even gotten to say goodbye," baww baww bawwww.

Not gonna lie, to save my sanity a rather large part of me is already formulating a headcanon in which Gokudera, Yamamoto and Reborn eventually track him down anyway, haha, but defense mechanism fangirl denial aside, I really loved this. <3

melissa_42 June 27 2010, 16:13:44 UTC

I really didn't want to split up Tsuna from his gay mafia family (lol XD), but the prompt was calling my name. D:

Lol, Gokudera's 'Tenth-radar' was probably going off as soon as Tsuna stepped out of his house. It's only a matter of time before the boys find their boss again!

Thanks for reading--I'm glad you thought it was IC!

tsunayoshi June 23 2010, 20:07:45 UTC

laksjdf S-So anyone who was on my city block probably heard my delighted shrieking when I saw this. jkladf augh you're the best. seriously.

melissa_42 June 27 2010, 16:15:59 UTC

Aww, thanks! :D I couldn't pass up that prompt. <3

katierox342 June 23 2010, 20:43:33 UTC

:3 So stalking this. By the by you have my eternal gratitude for having a layout I can actually read :) I look forward to reading this. I fear for them, but at the same time I can't stop reading now that you've given me a little bit. It's totally a trap Tsuna!! D8

melissa_42 June 29 2010, 23:14:04 UTC

I'm glad you liked it--but sorry, I just planned it as a one-shot! /o\ I totally understand about the readable layout--that's basically why I chose this one. ^^

ibuberu June 23 2010, 23:48:48 UTC

I really like this. I thought you portrayed Tsuna and Enma very well, as well as their awkward, unfamiliar friendship. Personally I think this could have been more emotional, especially regarding the last part where Tsuna 'pushed that thought to the back of his mind'. You could have considered a more obvious mental struggle within Tsuna (because he's leaving his friends and family etc, like you mentioned, but didn't delve into it that much imo) or just more details on his thought process and emotions, because I found this to be a very heavy matter -- the plot was incredible though, and I thought Enma was perfect with his nonchalance and little-little gestures of affection, especially at the end.

All in all, nice work :D

melissa_42 June 29 2010, 23:30:13 UTC

I'm glad the characterization wasn't too bad, but I can see what you mean about the lack of emotional struggle. I probably should have fleshed Tsuna's thoughts out more. Thank you so much for taking the time to read this and leave such a lengthy comment--I really appreciate it!!! :D

morgrix June 24 2010, 00:41:59 UTC

I feel my chest heavy after reading this, poor Tsuna!!! D:
And Enma, what do I think of you????
I want to read more.......

melissa_42 June 29 2010, 23:14:48 UTC

Haha, I'm not sure what to think of Enma, either. Thank you for commenting!!