What I've Learned From Men
"We might as well get a little tougher. Like cutting back on unnecessary smiling. For many women, smiling is an occupational requirement, but there's no reason to go around grinning when she's not being paid for it. I'd suggest that we save our off-duty smiles for when we truly feel like sharing them, and if you're not sure what to do with your face in the meantime, study Clint Eastwood's expressions - both of them.
I think women should stop taking responsibility for every human interaction we engage in...
In a social encounter with a woman, the average man can go 25 minutes saying nothing more that "You don't say?" "Is that so?" and, of course, "Hmmmm." Why should we do all the work? By taking so much responsibility for making conversations go well, we act as if we had much more at stake in the encounter than the other party - and that gives him (or her) the power advantage. Every now and then, we deserve to get more out of a conversation than we put into it.
Finally, we may be able to learn something from men about what to do with anger. As a general rule, women get irritated; men get mad. We make tight little smiles of ladylike exasperation; they pound on desks and roar. I wouldn't recommend emulating the full basso profundo male tantrum, but women do need ways of expressing justified anger clearly, colorfully, and when necessary, crudely. If you're not just irritated, but pissed off, it might help to say so."
--Barbara Ehrenreich
What I've Learned From Men: Lessons for a Full-Grown Feminist
I think women should stop taking responsibility for every human interaction we engage in...
In a social encounter with a woman, the average man can go 25 minutes saying nothing more that "You don't say?" "Is that so?" and, of course, "Hmmmm." Why should we do all the work? By taking so much responsibility for making conversations go well, we act as if we had much more at stake in the encounter than the other party - and that gives him (or her) the power advantage. Every now and then, we deserve to get more out of a conversation than we put into it.
Finally, we may be able to learn something from men about what to do with anger. As a general rule, women get irritated; men get mad. We make tight little smiles of ladylike exasperation; they pound on desks and roar. I wouldn't recommend emulating the full basso profundo male tantrum, but women do need ways of expressing justified anger clearly, colorfully, and when necessary, crudely. If you're not just irritated, but pissed off, it might help to say so."
--Barbara Ehrenreich
What I've Learned From Men: Lessons for a Full-Grown Feminist