update?
well i finished college a longlong time ago.
hurrah for barely passing my last quarter of college!
i straight up failed an econ class, and i got a C in my senior seminar and i passed a soc class.
i cried an incredible amount last quarter. it was super random because at times i felt that ANYTHING could make me cry. and at this juncture in my life i'm really really happy that i finished college just in time to say goodbye to all my friends.
i'm having a really hard time grappling with the fact that i am leaving santa cruz. i can't imagine how i lived my life without these key people in it. i can honestly say i am in love with at the bare minimum of 10 people. there are 10 people that i have met, loved, respected, and WANTED to get to know and STAY knowing them as people. i love charting how they have changed since i've known them, and i can't imagine going longer than three days without seeing them.
i woke up this morning with an incredible pang in my heart. i leave in thirty days. 30 days. the 30 day countdown, is what i called it. and i sat. and i cried. and i thought that nothing in the world would suck more than that day.
and i know more things wills suck than that day. because i've done this before.
i just... wish i could take them in my pocket. and be mine. and as creepy as that sounds, i really do. because i won't get to see them over the holidays like i do my high school friends. i won't be able to walk next door to see what people are doing. who else is going to play catan, taboo, foose, and rummikub with me?! what about trips to san jose for falafels?! or making stupid lists but getting TONS of people to join in the fun?! i don't know people who like to watch david attenburough documentaries! or talk about tons of fresh of the press politics. who else can talk about kitties and pretentious bullshit?! oh and the jokes, i don't know very many people as funny... smart, stupid, poopy, all kind sof it... as them. i'm going to miss skateboards. losing disc golfs in de lavega. DRINKING PARTNERS. THE POET! THE BLUE! GODDAMNIT, even THE RED! oh and surf city how i love you... and you too cypress. pacific is walking distance away from my house... how the hell am i leaving such a PRIME location?! talking shit to one another... well... i'll be real on that, i can get that anywhere. i'm gonna miss cuddling with the girls and innappropriate touching~! not to mention the people who can make my day brighter with just a few words.
santa cruz is a place where there are very few places i will miss. it is purely and simply the people. my thirty day countdown is a complete wreck to my heart. and i can't figure out if i am numbing myself or if i am just ok with leaving. i will cry randomly, but... ugh. i don't know.
i wish i could tell you highlights of my time since last year. but... i can't and i won't and i'd just like to say that i have been blissful. straight up living the life i want.
oh. college graduate... double major... early... workin at a carwash. YES. at least i now have register training!
hurrah for barely passing my last quarter of college!
i straight up failed an econ class, and i got a C in my senior seminar and i passed a soc class.
i cried an incredible amount last quarter. it was super random because at times i felt that ANYTHING could make me cry. and at this juncture in my life i'm really really happy that i finished college just in time to say goodbye to all my friends.
i'm having a really hard time grappling with the fact that i am leaving santa cruz. i can't imagine how i lived my life without these key people in it. i can honestly say i am in love with at the bare minimum of 10 people. there are 10 people that i have met, loved, respected, and WANTED to get to know and STAY knowing them as people. i love charting how they have changed since i've known them, and i can't imagine going longer than three days without seeing them.
i woke up this morning with an incredible pang in my heart. i leave in thirty days. 30 days. the 30 day countdown, is what i called it. and i sat. and i cried. and i thought that nothing in the world would suck more than that day.
and i know more things wills suck than that day. because i've done this before.
i just... wish i could take them in my pocket. and be mine. and as creepy as that sounds, i really do. because i won't get to see them over the holidays like i do my high school friends. i won't be able to walk next door to see what people are doing. who else is going to play catan, taboo, foose, and rummikub with me?! what about trips to san jose for falafels?! or making stupid lists but getting TONS of people to join in the fun?! i don't know people who like to watch david attenburough documentaries! or talk about tons of fresh of the press politics. who else can talk about kitties and pretentious bullshit?! oh and the jokes, i don't know very many people as funny... smart, stupid, poopy, all kind sof it... as them. i'm going to miss skateboards. losing disc golfs in de lavega. DRINKING PARTNERS. THE POET! THE BLUE! GODDAMNIT, even THE RED! oh and surf city how i love you... and you too cypress. pacific is walking distance away from my house... how the hell am i leaving such a PRIME location?! talking shit to one another... well... i'll be real on that, i can get that anywhere. i'm gonna miss cuddling with the girls and innappropriate touching~! not to mention the people who can make my day brighter with just a few words.
santa cruz is a place where there are very few places i will miss. it is purely and simply the people. my thirty day countdown is a complete wreck to my heart. and i can't figure out if i am numbing myself or if i am just ok with leaving. i will cry randomly, but... ugh. i don't know.
i wish i could tell you highlights of my time since last year. but... i can't and i won't and i'd just like to say that i have been blissful. straight up living the life i want.
oh. college graduate... double major... early... workin at a carwash. YES. at least i now have register training!