BE MY HEAD
i have been in and out of reality all week. and probably more out than in, for that matter.
but whatever. it's kind of a strange paradox: i didn't do any work last week, and didn't really do much of anything except smoking and eating, both in excess. but hey man, anything goes. it was probably the most self indulgent week of my life. anyway, back to the paradox: despite my lack of activity and intelligent thought, i feel more motivated than i ever have before. and i think it's not a coincidence that i got this huge surge of motivation and vivacity right when i'm doing practically less than i ever have: i've been doing what i want to do, when i want to do it, and not really caring about the consequences. and it's been lovely. people care too much about pleasing others and doing what they're "supposed" to do, and it makes them miserable and crazy. if everybody was a little more self indulgent, while the world might not necessarily be a better place, it would definitely be a happier one.
today i took a fair amount of adderall and had a kickass time doing my homework. i mean that. if i was prescribed adderall, i would be a straight A student and stay in all the time studying. and it'd be great. that's why i think adderall is the most dangerous drug of them all, because when you take it it makes you normal. and dilligent. gaah. um...yeah. i got a little out of control re: taking notes for my history paper (on the antiwar movement of the '60's, fuck yes.) it was just so goddamn fun, i couldn't stop myself. goddamn, adderall is a fucking miracle. i had so much fun doing my work. i love the '60s and the antiwar movement and the american revolution and the constitution and the theory of government. (keyword: THEORY.)
my poor head. it's been through a lot this week. and it's still (mostly) functioning.
what a motherfucking trooper.
but whatever. it's kind of a strange paradox: i didn't do any work last week, and didn't really do much of anything except smoking and eating, both in excess. but hey man, anything goes. it was probably the most self indulgent week of my life. anyway, back to the paradox: despite my lack of activity and intelligent thought, i feel more motivated than i ever have before. and i think it's not a coincidence that i got this huge surge of motivation and vivacity right when i'm doing practically less than i ever have: i've been doing what i want to do, when i want to do it, and not really caring about the consequences. and it's been lovely. people care too much about pleasing others and doing what they're "supposed" to do, and it makes them miserable and crazy. if everybody was a little more self indulgent, while the world might not necessarily be a better place, it would definitely be a happier one.
today i took a fair amount of adderall and had a kickass time doing my homework. i mean that. if i was prescribed adderall, i would be a straight A student and stay in all the time studying. and it'd be great. that's why i think adderall is the most dangerous drug of them all, because when you take it it makes you normal. and dilligent. gaah. um...yeah. i got a little out of control re: taking notes for my history paper (on the antiwar movement of the '60's, fuck yes.) it was just so goddamn fun, i couldn't stop myself. goddamn, adderall is a fucking miracle. i had so much fun doing my work. i love the '60s and the antiwar movement and the american revolution and the constitution and the theory of government. (keyword: THEORY.)
my poor head. it's been through a lot this week. and it's still (mostly) functioning.
what a motherfucking trooper.