movie: X-Men Origins: Wolverine
So, the X-Men movies? Are mixed in terms of silly things like quality, but are pretty enjoyable. I'm not even bitter that the original, fairly Jubilee-centric plots were changed in favor of a de-aged Rogue with passive powers and a superangsty version of Kitty Pryde's personality anymore. Ok, a bit. But that's character preference mixed with "But that's not Character X at all!" as opposed to flaws with the actual movies as independent entities. This? This is pretty awful, and a fairly incomprehensible mess. I mean, I think I could only follow the plot because I'm familiar with the canon it's based on. I shudder to think about watching it cold.
Maybe they expected us to be distracted enough by the eyecandy to not notice? No, wait, women and gay men don't like action/comic book movies, and bisexual men don't exist. Good lord, that probably means they thought it was good.
The first 10~ minutes are the best part. Primarily because you get a montage of Hugh Jackman fighting in various period outfits whilst sporting floppy hair. Actually, I think it was supposed to highlight the deep manly bond between Wolverine and Sabretooth, but I don't care about deep manly bonds where one half of the bond is a sadistic, raping, mass murderer. After that, the plot is this terribly convoluted thing meant to cram in every male x-character they could think of, regardless of whether or not they made sense in the story or were recognizable as their original versions, and I think the only way most of them would make any sense at all is if you had at least a passing familiarity with the basis for them. It also wreaks havoc on the actual movie canon from the X-Men trilogy, especially regarding character ages. (And then comic book fans stop and realize that if they ever did Gambit/Rogue in the movieverse, he'd be 40 years older than her, and go cower in the corner in fear.)
Can someone tell me in Lynn Collins's character was meant to be Silver Fox? If so, then I am wowed that they managed to make her original story even more full of genderfail.
For the good parts: Ryan Reynolds makes a pretty good Wade Wilson, despite being far too pretty for the role, Hugh Jackman wears tight jeans and still does the screaming angst well, Lynn Collins does her best with a horrifically bad and stereotypical character arc, and the fight scenes are pretty good.
However, to save you the pain of actually watching it, I offer up 2 far more entertaining alternatives:
Maybe they expected us to be distracted enough by the eyecandy to not notice? No, wait, women and gay men don't like action/comic book movies, and bisexual men don't exist. Good lord, that probably means they thought it was good.
The first 10~ minutes are the best part. Primarily because you get a montage of Hugh Jackman fighting in various period outfits whilst sporting floppy hair. Actually, I think it was supposed to highlight the deep manly bond between Wolverine and Sabretooth, but I don't care about deep manly bonds where one half of the bond is a sadistic, raping, mass murderer. After that, the plot is this terribly convoluted thing meant to cram in every male x-character they could think of, regardless of whether or not they made sense in the story or were recognizable as their original versions, and I think the only way most of them would make any sense at all is if you had at least a passing familiarity with the basis for them. It also wreaks havoc on the actual movie canon from the X-Men trilogy, especially regarding character ages. (And then comic book fans stop and realize that if they ever did Gambit/Rogue in the movieverse, he'd be 40 years older than her, and go cower in the corner in fear.)
Can someone tell me in Lynn Collins's character was meant to be Silver Fox? If so, then I am wowed that they managed to make her original story even more full of genderfail.
For the good parts: Ryan Reynolds makes a pretty good Wade Wilson, despite being far too pretty for the role, Hugh Jackman wears tight jeans and still does the screaming angst well, Lynn Collins does her best with a horrifically bad and stereotypical character arc, and the fight scenes are pretty good.
However, to save you the pain of actually watching it, I offer up 2 far more entertaining alternatives:
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