Pieces of brain-stuff.
So, I'm catching up with LJ for the first time in a long time, and I am awestruck by how intelligent and insightful my friends are. I'm seeing all these really excellent, long, personal posts that seem to give me a direct line to their souls, and I remember when I used to write really open, vulnerable things about my feelings and the events of my life. I feel I may have lost something in the cessation of those postings. So here's what's going on in my life:
I am finally about to graduate, after six years at DigiPen, eight years in college, and 21 years in school (if you count preschool, which I do). This is exciting, but also unnerving. I think my current state can best be described as "freaking out". I'm going to have to find a job soon! And not just a summer job, but a permanent job where I'm not getting paid by the hour. Will I be able to cut it? Will I even be able to find work in this economic climate? Much of last year's batch of DigiPen BFA seniors is unemployed, or employed but not doing art for a living. Needless to say, this scares me. My business cards are on their way, though, so that's good.
I've also suddenly woken up and remembered that I'm a feminist. It's astounding how much bullshit I see out there in the world when I take off the DigiPen-colored glasses. Wow wow wow. When you spend so much time in a male-dominated environment where there's disincentive to be "politically correct," there's an amazing amount of stuff that just slides right off of you. Rape jokes, spousal abuse jokes, invitations to suck the cock of someone who disagrees with something you've said, everything being described as gay. It all seems so innocuous until you actually think about the meaning of the words. I'm sick of it. Luckily, I'm out of here soon, although I can't imagine it's too much better in the industry. It can't possibly be worse.
Bah. Anyway, yeah. It seems I'm not as full of insight as I'd hoped. I wanted to take up lots and lots of space with really deep introspective shit. Apparently not going to happen. Oh, hey, did you guys hear about the e-mail the mayor of Los Alamitos, California sent out? It was appalling, and I was appalled. Here's a video about it. He claims he had no idea that "black people like watermelon" was a stereotype. I almost want to believe him, because I spent 20 years not knowing this myself, but the thing is, without that, there's no joke, and therefore no point in forwarding the e-mail on. Can anyone think of some possible non-racist explanation?
Okay, I'm going to go paint or do something productive like that. I've been in some kind of weird funk all day. Probably because I had a "fig" with my husband last night. We've started recording on a calendar when we have a fight (we've shortened fight to fig, because the calendar is right by the door and I don't want any curious UPS guys or whatever to know all about our marital disputes), in the hopes of a)fighting less, and b)realizing that we don't, in fact, fight all the time. We've both been so stressed out lately, it really seems like we do. I keep telling myself DigiPen will be over soon and then, perhaps, we won't be so stressed. We'll have the time and energy to clean. We sort of only have time either to cook or to clean right now, and having homemade meals is more important to both of us than being able to see the floor. Anyway, painting time!
I am finally about to graduate, after six years at DigiPen, eight years in college, and 21 years in school (if you count preschool, which I do). This is exciting, but also unnerving. I think my current state can best be described as "freaking out". I'm going to have to find a job soon! And not just a summer job, but a permanent job where I'm not getting paid by the hour. Will I be able to cut it? Will I even be able to find work in this economic climate? Much of last year's batch of DigiPen BFA seniors is unemployed, or employed but not doing art for a living. Needless to say, this scares me. My business cards are on their way, though, so that's good.
I've also suddenly woken up and remembered that I'm a feminist. It's astounding how much bullshit I see out there in the world when I take off the DigiPen-colored glasses. Wow wow wow. When you spend so much time in a male-dominated environment where there's disincentive to be "politically correct," there's an amazing amount of stuff that just slides right off of you. Rape jokes, spousal abuse jokes, invitations to suck the cock of someone who disagrees with something you've said, everything being described as gay. It all seems so innocuous until you actually think about the meaning of the words. I'm sick of it. Luckily, I'm out of here soon, although I can't imagine it's too much better in the industry. It can't possibly be worse.
Bah. Anyway, yeah. It seems I'm not as full of insight as I'd hoped. I wanted to take up lots and lots of space with really deep introspective shit. Apparently not going to happen. Oh, hey, did you guys hear about the e-mail the mayor of Los Alamitos, California sent out? It was appalling, and I was appalled. Here's a video about it. He claims he had no idea that "black people like watermelon" was a stereotype. I almost want to believe him, because I spent 20 years not knowing this myself, but the thing is, without that, there's no joke, and therefore no point in forwarding the e-mail on. Can anyone think of some possible non-racist explanation?
Okay, I'm going to go paint or do something productive like that. I've been in some kind of weird funk all day. Probably because I had a "fig" with my husband last night. We've started recording on a calendar when we have a fight (we've shortened fight to fig, because the calendar is right by the door and I don't want any curious UPS guys or whatever to know all about our marital disputes), in the hopes of a)fighting less, and b)realizing that we don't, in fact, fight all the time. We've both been so stressed out lately, it really seems like we do. I keep telling myself DigiPen will be over soon and then, perhaps, we won't be so stressed. We'll have the time and energy to clean. We sort of only have time either to cook or to clean right now, and having homemade meals is more important to both of us than being able to see the floor. Anyway, painting time!