WTF

[meg14meg14]

So the past few days have been insanely crazy. But I'm just going to fill you all in on the delightful stuff that happened today. I was in the computer lab today before my 2 o'clock class and my sister was online and I was talking to her. She asked me at one point if I wanted my dad to move back into the house. I dont know if I wrote an entry about him moving out but if I didn't, I'll provide that story later. I said "I fucking hope not" and I didnt think anything of it because everyone in my house knows how I feel. But somehow I had a bad feeling. Like I knew it was going to get back to my dad and somehow he'd be mad. So I go to my education class, and then I'm sitting in my night class reading when my dad calls my cell phone. I texted him that I was in class and I'd call him on my break. He called again and I didn't answer and then he texted me back "okay, everythings fine." So he calls me again at 8 o'clock (we didn't get a break tonight because he ended class early). I called him when I got out of class and, surprise surprise, he asked me about what I said. I told him that it wasn't a secret and I've told him that a million times, but he said he was furious or some shit. I don't know. So I hung up with him and called my sister Jen cuz she said she was feeling depressed earlier and I told her I'd call her. I asked her if she told my dad what I said and she said she told my mom and mom must have told dad. So I thought fine, whatever. Then I lost my connection with my sister and my dad called me back and started yelling some more. I finally told him I couldnt deal with this shit and I had to go and I hung up cuz I couldnt even get my ID out of my bag to get into my apartment complex and it was pouring. My mom called me while I was on the phone with my dad so I called her back and said "what do you want" and she just wanted to make sure I was okay. And I told her I wasn't and I'm sick of this and I dont know what to do because I dont think I can live at home next year with this shit and she tried to calm me down and I told her that every single one of them could go the fuck to hell cuz I was done. And then I got off the phone with her. I called her back 15 minutes later and asked her how she can say she doesnt love my dad anymore and yet I'm the bad guy. And then I apologized for cursing at her but I was unbelievably pissed off. And then I heard my dad in the background and got off the phone. Then my dad called me and asked me why I was talking to my mom. Then he told me that I should just stay out of it, its none of my business. Even though he puts me in the middle of everything. He said he'd stop but I dont believe him for one fucking second. He is the biggest fucking hypocrit in the entire world. He always talks about how he has no privacy and he needs some time alone with my mom but he has to know fucking EVERYTHING thats going on. We hashed it out and he thinks that everything is okay but I'm still fucking fuming. And then I called my sister back to make sure she's okay. First she tells me what happened with my brother (long separate story, has nothing to do with this) and then she starts hysterically crying because my dad has been saying all this mean shit about her and now shes gotta look at him every day and pretend like nothing ever happened (because he's been saying all this mean shit about her and my mom mentioned it to her but she asked me about it and I gave her some of the details but I made her promise not to tell my dad). She cried for like an hour and I'm really worried about her. She's 8 months pregnant, she can't be putting this much stress on herself. So I made the decision that I'm going to tell my dad what I said so I get the blame and they can clear the air between them. And now I'm trying to figure out what I'm going to do for housing next year again because I sure as hell cannot live there. I still can't get over the fact that my mom says that she doesnt love him to my aunt and when he called her a few weeks ago and asked to come home and sleep in the den cuz he found a cheaper apartment but it wouldnt be ready for a month. She actually said no! He would have been out on the street and she still said no. It makes no sense to me.

And now its back to the drawing board as far as housing for next year. :(

Okay, time to calm down and do homework. Yippee.