Where have I been?
On the couch still. This being a grown up is tough. I'm not quite used to it yet, now that Mom had to return to work so the office runs smoothly as possible when my father was allowed near his appointment calendar. That's never a good thing. Just kidding... mostly.
Hair update: I am down to checking every other day now. That's progress, right?
One eyebrow is poised to make a big comeback (ok, one part of one eyebrow). The lashes are lagging, especially on the bottom and the ones I have noticed look like they're white. Now, the hair on my head? Well, I think if it continues in the current pattern, I'm going to look like Riff Raff from Rocky Horror. The sides have some short little fuzzy flyaway’s, some of which are even brown, like my hair was. The back, what there is back there, feels soft, but I've no idea if there's any length to it. The top... well, that's the baldest part. Some stubblings here and there, some of which are going to stick around, some that will fall out at the sight of the lint roller. Sigh. It's Spring-ish here in the AV. The wigs will stay on their stands where they can't be blown across a parking lot or into the aqueduct.
Anyway, radiation started last week, and (not really surprised about this) I'm tired. It's not something I necessarily feel every minute of every day. If I've got something to do, I push through it like I used to BC (before cancer). But when I stop... LOOK OUT, MICH. My brain gets fuzzy or, even worse, drifts to all the things that stress me that I can usually hold back. So far, I've been able to get B to school and keep food in the house and actually get something home cooked on the table for dinner. The dishes aren't piling up, and the laundry is slowly getting done. A friend cleans for me. The thought of hauling the vacuum around is daunting, although the front hall desperately needs to be deep cleaned again. Still, even doing the bare minimum, I almost didn't make it past 6 pm the first Friday. Last week, that happened by Thursday. B had yesterday off, and was sick today, and I took it easy all weekend (I was sick Sat.), so maybe I'll make it past tomorrow this week.
See, I just lost my train of thought. It's chemo brain or brain fog as I've heard it's called now. However I'm supposed to refer to it, that's my story and I'm going to exploit this excuse for as long as I possibly can...
What can I say about radiation? Well, of course, the staff is very nice. Kind and caring. My standing appointment is around dinner time, which sucks as far as getting us fed during the week (time wise) but is wonderful because there's no wait at that hour. Basically, I walk in, slip into my fashionable scrub green smock/gown thing and go in and get positioned on the table. I finally figured out how to properly tie the gown today, yay me! After I'm in place, the machine moves around and zaps me in four areas. All in all, it takes two or three minutes. Every other day, they put a bolas (don't ask me how it's spelled) over me and it concentrates the radiation better than my skin does, so the scar tissue gets hit thoroughly. At least I think that's what they told me. In any event, the first time they did it, I had pain, but none since. My skin is holding up, but they said it takes about 3 weeks for the skin effects to show up. The doctor said the tired feeling is from the whole cancer journey, but the jury is still out on that as far as I'm concerned.
What have I been doing with my time when B is at school and I'm not food shopping or running for some cancer related something? I'm working on an autism authorization course. It's all online, and it goes pretty quickly. It's required by my district that I complete it by the end of this year, although by May gets me tuition reimbursement. But if I'd had the foresight not to let my Early Childhood Special Education credential go, I might not have had to do the program at all because that credential authorized me to work with kids with mild to severe disabilities, not just mild to moderate disabilities like the current one. Oh well, live and learn.
I've been revisiting old manuscripts as well, trying to decide what to do with them. I've got some ideas rattling around my brain as well, so I'm making lots of notes. It's a good thing I shop the back to school, 5 cent notebook sales in July. I like to write longhand and then do minor editing as I type the story into Word. And before I know it, it's time to go pick B up from school and get him going on homework or to whatever appointment or class he might have.
Oh yeah, I just picked up a Relay for Life flyer. I've always donated to my friend Anthony Card no’s team, but I might have to sign up for this one. It's on April 14, somewhere up here. If I do remember to register, don't be surprised to find me soliciting donations. You've been warned... but it really is a good cause that has always been close to my heart. I just never expected it to become THIS CLOSE, if you know what I mean...
Later, gators.